What Might Have Been
by leggylover03
Summary: What might have been if Harry had never gone to the Dursley's but instead been raised a wizard?
1. Chapter 1

Title: What Might Have Been 

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 1

It was a balmy night in October, and Severus Snape was about to go down to breakfast. He was enjoying the peace and quiet away from Hogwarts. He was just sitting down to the table, and his house elf Lucy was bringing him his coffee, when an owl came flittering through the open window.

"Who could be sending me mail at this hour?" Severus thought as he laid down his paper and untied the letter from her talon. It only took a moment for Severus to come to his senses and realize from the handwriting it was Lily's owl.

Opening the letter, he realized only the first part was Lily's handwriting and the rest was in the messy scratching he had come to recognize as James'. Severus let loose the breath he was holding and started to read it.

_Severus,_

_James and I have talked and we wish for you to come to the house tonight. I feel the Dark Lord is close, and I would not leave this world without you knowing._

Severus did not know what Lily wanted. He had only shared a few weeks with her before she had gone into hiding with James. They had gotten married in secret, knowing that Lily was pregnant, and not wanting to bring the child into the world without a stable family home.

_Severus, what Lily is trying to say is that we would like to talk to you and would like if you would join us tonight at eight._

The letter said no more, merely having been signed by Lily and then James. Severus thought it was the oddest thing ever, but he was not one to over think things. He simply took them for what they were.

It was seven o'clock and Severus had just stepped from the shower. His hair was wringing wet and clean. How the students at Hogwarts would gasp if they could see him now, he thought with a sneer. Walking to the dresser, he pulled out a black shirt and pulled it on over his head. His thoughts drifted again to what James and Lily could possibly want, but seeing as he would get no answers until he got there, he hurriedly dressed.

Severus walked up to the house in Godric's Hollow and was about to knock on the door when it opened. Standing there was Lily, her smile as radiant as he remembered.

"Come in, Severus," she said, opening the door to allow him to pass, but she held his gaze for a few seconds. A look passed between them, one Severus had seen before on one hot, passion-filled night when Lily and he seemed to be the only people in the world.

As Severus walked into the sitting room, he saw James standing by the mantle, pacing the floor, as if something was bothering him.

"Severus, please have a seat."

Severus took the seat and the cup of tea being offered to him by Lily. There were a million things running through his mind as to what they wanted, but of course his face was a stone wall, seeming unnerved by all of this. He wanted to scream at them to just go ahead and say whatever it was, but instead he cleared his throat, hoping it would provoke one of them into speaking. It seemed to do the trick as Lily turned to face him.

"Severus, as you know, we dated for many months, and I want you to know before I go any further that I never regretted a moment of it. I loved you and, truth be known, a part of me still does. I was lost when you went away to join the Dark Lord, and I had no way of finding you, no way of telling you the things I needed to say."

Severus' mouth fell open as he listened to his only love Lily confess her feelings in front of James. He just knew at any moment the man would pull his wand and blast him into the next room, but James was taking it in stride.

His cup of tea long forgotten Severus' eyes watched those ruby red lips move, but the sounds did not reach his ears. These were the lips that had set his very soul on fire that night and for many nights after. He had loved no woman before Lily and no woman since. His biggest fear came true the night he had returned and found her gone. He had not wanted to leave her, but he could not defy the Dark Lord.

"Severus, did you hear what I said?" Lily asked.

Severus shook his head, trying to clear it, and realized he had not heard what she had said. He had been too mesmerized by the depths of her eyes.

Lily couldn't bring herself to repeat any of it, and she turned to her husband with pleading eyes. James could see the fear of rejection, the fear of what may come of this revelation. Taking a seat in the chair opposite Severus, he began again.

"Severus, it is no lie that I was jealous of your relationship with Lily. I let my anger show through and made your last year at Hogwarts unbearable, and for that I am truly sorry. I was younger then. I could not see that you were not out to hurt her. Since then Lily has told me of her love for you, how you helped her through many tough times with her sister."

Severus wished Sirius Black were here right now. Hell, he wished he had a recorder, as James Potter was apologizing to him, and this must mean the world was about to end.

"Severus, I wish to let the past remain in the past and let us move on and be friends."

Severus could not comprehend any of it. He could not fathom why James Potter was here asking for his friendship, and he wanted answers. "Why, why now after all this time has gone by?"

Severus did not miss the tear that slipped from Lily's eye, and he wished to run to her and wrap his arms around as he had done each night before they had fallen asleep, but it was not his place now.

"I know, Severus. I know of the nights of passion you shared with Lily, but what you did not know was the end result of those nights." Not being able to say it any other way, James just blurted it out. "Harry is your son, Severus, not mine."

The clatter of Severus' cup hitting the floor echoed throughout the room. His knees buckled and Severus found himself on the floor, the shock of the statement sending chills to the very core of his heart. It couldn't be true. He could not believe what he had just heard, but one look into Lily's eyes told him the truth. He was the father.

Severus was still reeling from all the information when he heard a soft cooing coming from behind him. When he turned, there was Lily, holding Harry.

The baby was his; this was his son. He wanted to hold him, to never let him go, but could he? He had never been a gentle man, caring only enough about Lily to ever show his softer side. How could he remove Harry from his home? How could he take the baby from the only father he had ever known. His questions were answered when Lily opened her mouth to speak.

"Severus, we want you in Harry's life. I want him to know you are his father, but as long as you are a spy, we can tell no one else. James and I would not have you miss out on his life."

Severus was stunned. He had no words for this moment. The usually sarcastic, snide man was at a loss. The tears that had been pooling in his eyes for the last hour flowed freely down his face as Harry was placed in his arms.

All the animosity of the years washed away that night as Severus got to know the real James, the one he had only seen from afar before. He was not a bad man, but instead a good father. James had known all along that Harry was not his, and yet he had taken him and loved him as his son. Severus stayed until the wee hours of the morning, watching Harry as he tugged on the hem of his robes and watching as Lily tucked him into bed.

What Severus had not told them was that his dark mark had burned. Severus would not leave his son for the Dark Lord tonight. He would suffer consequences for it, but as he stared down at the sleeping form of his child, none of it really seemed to matter. As he walked out of the house at Godric's Hollow, Severus promised he would come back tomorrow to go with them to the Halloween festival. He would not miss out on anymore of the important times in his sons' life.

When Severus apparated back to his home that night, he thought someone had been there. Looking around he saw that his things had been moved.

"Lucy! Has anyone been here to see me tonight?" he called to the house elf.

Lucy came in wringing her hands. "Master Malfoy came by to see sir, but sir was gone. He said he would be here tomorrow to see you."

"Did he say anything else?"

"No, sir, he only said he would see sir tomorrow."

"Very well. I am going to bed. Will you have breakfast ready at seven? I have plans for tomorrow and I need to go to Hogsmeade beforehand."

Lucy nodded her head yes, but backed out of the room slowly. Did her master just ask her for something? He never asked before, he usually demanded. Lucy decided it was best not to tempt fate and scurried back to her room before the world exploded.

Severus pulled off his robe and hung it on the rack and then slipped his shoes off. He was tired. His whole world had been turned upside down in the matter of a few minutes, and it had drained him. He could not think rationally, and he was not used to the feeling. He liked being in control, and he was certainly not in control now. Knowing tomorrow he would have to face Lucius gave Severus a dull headache. Rubbing his temples, he decided he would cross that bridge when he came to it. Nothing could ruin this night, not even the Dark Lord himself. Noxing the light, he rolled over and buried his head in the pillow, asleep in seconds.


	2. Will I Make it in Time

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death

Chapter 2

Severus rolled over in his bed. It was still an hour before dawn but he had been tossing and turning all night. Knowing he wasn't going to get anymore sleep, Severus swung his feet over the side of the bed and got up. Grabbing his robe, he sat down on the window sill and stared out into the still starry sky. His mind replayed last nights events over and over. He had a son, someone to share all of his potion secrets with, someone to spoil like he had never been. The moonlight filtering through the window caught something -- a smile.

As Severus walked to the Great Hall, there seemed to be a spring to his step. When he sat down, there was no usual sneer, and he missed the mouths gaping open in shock.

"Why is everyone staring at me?" Severus said, the glare creeping back over his face.

Minerva, the one usually on the end of one of his rants about her Gryffindors, spoke up. "Severus, this is the first morning this year I have not heard a complaint being uttered from your mouth at the first sight of me. Are you ill?"

Severus dropped his fork and noticed all the teachers, the headmaster included, were staring at him. Placing his best scowl on his face, Severus gave them all the sneer he reserved for his students. This seemed to make things normal again, and they all began eating again, as if the conversation had never happened. Severus himself dropped his gaze, finding his rice very interesting all of a sudden. What he didn't want them to see was the smile forming on his lips.

As the students filed out of the Great Hall, Dumbledore came over and placed his hand on Severus' shoulder. "Severus, I have not seen you at all lately. How about tea later in my office?"

Severus, thinking quickly on his feet, answered, "I am sorry, Albus, but I shall have to decline. I have a meeting later this afternoon with one of the parents, and I am scheduled for dinner with an old friend."

"Perhaps another time then, Severus," Albus said, walking away.

Severus wasted no time. He wanted to buy Harry something, something that would be from him. Not turning at the corner for the dungeons, Severus instead walked out the giant front doors and toward Hogsmeade. Normally he would have taken the floo, as not to run into students, but today he felt as if nothing could ruin this day, not even one of those Gryffindors.

Severus first walked into Flourish and Blotts, thinking that perhaps a nice book would entice the child, something he could read to Harry before bed, but soon discarded that idea. He wanted something personal, something that would remind Harry of him when he was not there.

Two hours later and Severus was ready to maim anyone within reach. He had searched the book store, the potion shop, and had even gone into the Quidditch shop, and he was still without a gift. Standing in the middle of the walkway he noticed several witches pushing their babies in prams and all were heading into the same shop, Binkies' Bottles and Blankets.

Holding his head high and placing a look on his face that dared anyone to talk to him, Severus strode into the shop. When he stepped in, Severus wanted to retch at the sight of babies everywhere and women cooing and kissing them all. Severus' only thought was how they were passing germs to every breathing thing in this room. Glancing around, Severus did not see anything suitable for Harry, until his eyes fell on a soft blue blanket. Not his first choice of colors, but the velvety touch of the fabric drew him in. It was so soft that Severus found himself rubbing it against his face.

"If you would like to purchase it, I can have it wrapped for you in five minutes," the saleslady said, giving Severus an odd look.

The motion was swift, almost knocking the lady off her feet, as Severus shot up from where he was kneeling. "I would like one of these, yes, and could you be swift? I would like to finish my errands sometime today."

Severus did not mean to be so rude, but the thought of anyone finding him here in this shop, sent shivers through him. He would rather be eaten by one of Hagrid's creatures than endure that. Taking his bundle, he left the shop as if a pack of hungry wolves were on his heels. Once back inside Hogwarts, Severus made a beeline for the dungeons. He hid Harry's gift and went to wash the weird perfumey smell he had acquired off of him. He had spent longer in Hogsmeade than he planned and was now rushing.

Stepping out of the shower, Severus felt the hairs on the back of his neck stand up. Swinging around, he felt the presence on the other side of the door before the knock sounded. Severus hid the bundle for Harry underneath his robes and opened the door. Stepping inside was non other than Lucius Malfoy, and he had a grin on his face like it was Christmas Eve.

"What is it that you want, Malfoy?"

"Why, Severus, is that any way to treat a friend who has come to bring you good news?"

Severus sneered at Malfoy, the pure hatred for the man churning up something vicious inside him. "You have never brought me anything but a headache. What is it that you want? I have things to do."

"The Dark Lord called some of us for a meeting, Severus, but I am afraid I could not find you to give you the good news. He has sent someone to kill those insufferable Potters."

Severus' face fell, his heart stopping.

"I knew you would be disappointed that you could not be there to witness their demise, therefore I came as quickly as I could. The Aurors will be arriving shortly, but you can still go and gloat over finally being rid of James and his muggle whore."

Severus didn't hear anything else, his mind racing, his heart slowly breaking into a thousand pieces. "Harry..." he thought as he pushed past Lucius, knocking him to the floor. Severus had to get to them before it was too late. 


	3. What Has Fate Allowed?

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

A/N/N: Yes, in this chapter Severus knows where Godric's Hollow is.

Chapter 3

Severus apparted down the street from Godric's Hollow and heard the spine chilling scream pierce the air. "Lily!" he screamed as he took off running towards the house. When he got there, he saw many dark figures apparating away and the remains of the house in shambles.

Fire was quickly trying to consume the house, and Severus, uncaring for his own safety, ran through the front door. Inside he found James lying on the floor, wand still in his hand. All his years of bitter rivalry melted against him. Now he only saw a good father who had died trying to protect his family.

Severus remembered what he came for and ran into Harry's room. He looked where the crib once was, but now only broken shards remained. Looking down at his feet he saw the wisp of red hair, and his body collapsed, sending him to his knees. Lily, his Lily, lay there with her eyes frozen in shock, but Severus did not miss the tears still fresh on her face. Taking the blanket he had brought for Harry, Severus wiped away her tears and then kissed her once more on her cheek.

"Goodbye, my love," Severus said as he pulled his knees up and sat cradling her in his arms. The same man Severus had once vowed to serve had just taken his whole reason for living from him. No longer wishing to live, Severus lay down beside Lily and waited for fate to take him to her waiting arms. All the tears he had never shed fell forth in torrents from his eyes, his body heaving with the sobs.

"Why!" he screamed out. This is punishment for all the things I have done, he thought, and a just punishment it is. I have killed on a whim, watched as people begged for their lives, and I did nothing. Severus' curled into a ball, but as he gave up his will to live a tiny wail was caught by his ears.

"Harry?" Severus asked himself. "Surely I must be wishing, or dreaming." But the sound of more wailing and sobbing made him rise off the floor. When he scanned the room, his eyes caught a bright green jumper.

"Harry!" Severus screamed, running over to the corner where the child was. Picking him up, he looked him up and down for any signs of injury, but the boy seemed to have none except for the lightning bolt scar on his head that was bleeding. Walking back over, Severus picked up the blanket and wiped at the blood on his forehead.

Harry quieted down immediately in Severus' arms. It was almost as if he knew Severus was not there to hurt him. He still whimpered as Severus wiped up the blood, but the crying had stopped.

Severus wanted to access him more, to check for other injuries, but he heard the pop of many people apparating outside. Not knowing if the Dark Lord had returned, Severus threw the blanket down and ran out the back door. As soon as he made it to the treeline of the woods, he apparated to his home.

Albus Dumbledore, followed by ten other Aurors, stormed through the house. Inside the sitting room they, too, found James, and Dumbledore had him taken out. Dumbledore was looking for someone, the same someone he knew was destined to do great things since the day he was born, and that was Harry.

When he opened the door to the nursery, he spotted the carnage left behind in the wake of the Death Eaters, and Voldemort. The room was in shambles, furniture broken, walls bearing black scorch marks and, on the floor, Lily Potter, dead. Kneeling down next to her, Dumbledore let out the deafening wail.

"It seems you put up a good fight, Lily," he said to the still body. Then lifting her up in his arms, he handed her to one of the Aurors.

"Take special care with her, she was a wonderful woman."

Albus and Minerva searched the whole house from top to bottom, but found no sign of Harry. When they were about to give up the pop of someone apparating had them turning, wands drawn, to see who it was. Staring back at them was Remus Lupin.

His eyes were misted over, his mouth hanging open in horror, but Remus was determined that if Harry were inside, he would find him. Stepping in he sensed Harry right away and was drawn to his room. He first went to where the crib had been and saw a bottle broken in two pieces, the milk splattered on the wall, but that was not what Remus smelled.

Walking back over to where Lily had lain only minutes before, Remus spotted something else -- a blue blanket with the name "Harry" on it, but when he picked it up he saw the blood smeared across it. His features paled, his stomach heaving all its contents onto the floor. His friends were gone, dead, and they had killed Harry. Nothing else could be heard for miles as Remus let out the heart stopping howl.

The Aurors were about to go, leaving Dumbledore alone with his thoughts.What will the wizarding world do without Harry Potter? The prophecy said he was going to live and defeat the Dark Lord, but it was wrong, for nothing that remained in the house lived, and all that was left of Harry Potter was the blood stained blanket clutched in his hand. 


	4. Am I ready to be a Father?

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 4

Severus thought about heading back to Hogwarts, but he knew the press would be hounding Dumbledore and every other witch or wizard there about the attacks. He couldn't think straight for the first time in a long time and so went to the only place he knew -- home.

Severus made it past the road leading up to his house, his mind blank, still in shock over the night's events. He opened the door slowly and walked through the dark house. "Where is Lucy?" he thought, but just then the house elf appeared.

"Can Lucy get sir anything?"

Severus shook his head no. Laying his son carefully on the couch, he looked down at him and his heart lurched in his stomach. Lucy gasped as she saw that the small bundle was a child. A child had not been seen in this house since Severus himself was born.

Severus realized that Harry hadn't made any noise at all since he had picked him up in the house.

"Is it dead?" Lucy said, not really wanting to know the answer.

"Dead?" The question lingered only for a minute in Severus' mind before the panic set in. Taking Harry in his arms, he started yelling, "Harry! Wake up Harry!"

The sound of the wails coming from the child were music to his ears, and Severus pulled the toddler to him, wrapping him protectively against his chest.

"Would sir like me to fix something to eat?"

"Eat, what did a child of this age eat?" Severus wondered. Not really knowing, he asked for some soft foods. In minutes the table was laden down with potatoes and vegetables that could be mashed up easily and given to a child.

Severus sat with Harry on his lap after finding that Harry sitting in the chair alone was not an option. The child gleefully ate some of the food offered to him on the fork and flung the rest on Severus, and his robes. The rest of the meal consisted of Severus trying to pick bits of lima beans out of his hair, and trying to get Harry to eat more.

Finally giving up, Severus decided that they both needed a bath. Carrying Harry to the tub, Severus soon learned that a toddler was quite a slippery little rascal. As he soaped up the rag and washed Harry's arms and legs, Harry placed a big mound of bubbles on his head. The giggles coming from Harry and Lucy had Severus scowling.

"Be still, Harry, so I can get finished."

That was an impossible task as Harry squirmed and splashed Severus and, by the time the bath was done, Severus was soaking wet himself. He took Harry from the tub, but balked at Lucy taking him into the other room. He was not ready to let the child out of his sight just yet. This suited Harry just fine as he watched Severus in the tub, gurgling incoherent words the whole time.

Coming from the bath were two very clean people. Severus sat Harry on the bed, put on his pajamas, and then turned back to Harry, who was still wrapped in the towel. He realized that Harry had no clothes with him and the ones left in the house were gone. Going over to his dresser, Severus pulled out one of his black shirts. Shrinking it down, he placed it over Harry's head. It still hung to the child's knees, but it would do for the night.

"Would sir like for me to make the child a bed?"

"No," was the quick reply. "Lucy, this is my son, Harry. I must tell you now that you are to protect him as you would I."

Lucy nodded her head, "Lucy is a good house elf. She will care for Harry like she did Master Snape when he was small."

Severus was relieved that Lucy had not questioned him further. His heart still ached from losing Lily, and he had no idea how to be a father. "What will I do?" he thought as he lay down on the bed, tucking Harry under the covers. As he peered down at the toddler, he noticed how small he seemed in the queen-sized bed.

"I do not know how to be a father, Harry, but together we will teach each other. You just remind me when I am doing it wrong." Harry reached up and grabbed his nose and then rolled over and fell asleep.

Severus could not fall asleep, his mind always going back to Lily staring up, her eyes that used to light his soul so dead, so lifeless. It plagued him when he closed his eyes, and even when he was awake. Severus wished he had known two years ago that he had produced a child that night, for he would have prepared to become a father; now the task had been thrown on him.

His mind went from one thought to another -- the special moments he and Lily shared, from the midnight secret meetings by the Forbidden Forest to the afternoon teas in Hogsmeade. Severus had been able to be himself around Lily, not the scowling, sneering bastard everyone saw him portray.

He was jolted from his memories when Harry began to whimper beside him. Severus knew the child was going to be traumatized by what he had seen that night. He had seen his mother, and the only father he knew killed before his eyes. Severus did the only thing he knew to do; he pulled Harry to him.

"Shhh, it will be all right, Harry. Daddy is here now." Severus knew Harry did not think of him as his father, but to Severus it did not matter. One day Harry would come to know him this way and, until then, he would be there for him. When Harry rolled over and clung to Severus, he at that moment stole his heart. Severus closed his eyes again, but this time when he opened them all he could see was the tousle of black hair, lying on his chest. 


	5. Toddler Proofing

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 5

Severus woke up with a headache to end all headaches. The night before he had shed all the tears he built up for twenty or so years, on top of which had been the constant tossing and turning of the child. Severus was holding his arms over his head, trying to pop the kinks out when he noticed the lump that had been laying under him was gone.

"Harry!" Severus yelled, jumping from the bed. First, Severus flung every cover off the bed. When he did not find Harry there, he knelt down and looked underneath. Fear griping him, Severus next tore his closet apart, throwing clothes about the room and then went into the bathroom to search. Having not found Harry yet, Severus tried to swallow the lump in his throat. Gathering himself up, Severus opened the door. There sitting on the couch was Harry, looking at some picture book. Berating himself, Severus went and sat down at the table, taking the cup of coffee offered by Lucy, and trying to calm his still shaking hands. "Harry, come to the table to eat."

Severus looked over to where Harry sat and saw that the child could not even see over the top of the table, much less reach the food. With a quick flick of his wand, Harry's seat started to rise until he was able to reach all the food on the table, and reach he did.

Harry's hand first grabbed a sausage off his plate, and when he had finished gnawing on it, he placed the half chewed remains of it back on the plate before reaching and grabbing a small handful of eggs.

Severus was appalled at the toddler's table manners, but he was even more horrified when Harry once again took up the sausage and offered it to him, the child's slobber still dripping off it. Severus pushed the small hand, and its contents away before he spewed what little breakfast he had eaten. Standing up and taking Harry from his seat, Severus noticed the sticky fingers, the egg in his hair, and the crumbs all over his face.

"It is time for another bath I believe," he said, leading Harry into the bedroom. Severus placed him on the bed while he went to run the water, but when he got back, Harry was no where to be found. Deciding he didn't want to search the already destroyed room again, Severus pulled out his wand.

"Point me Harry," he said, and the wand twirled on his palm and pointed right back into the kitchen.

Severus followed the wand, but he did not see Harry anywhere. Glancing back down, he saw the wand was turning again and pointed straight for the door. "The pond!" Severus thought and bolted for the door.

Forgetting that he was still in his pajamas, Severus ran through the door and rounded the corner. The stares from the mailman were not even noticed as Severus spotted Harry near the pond. "Harry!" he screamed, watching as Harry splashed around the edge. Severus knew the boy could fall in and go under, so without thinking, the spell left his wand, freezing the child in place.

Grabbing him up and sighing, Severus started walking back into the house. Though at sight of the mail man, he pulled his robe shut tight.

"Stay right here, Harry," he told him as he went to shut the door, glaring at the still lurking mailman, but when he turned around Harry was gone again.

"Harry! Come out this instant!"

Throwing his hands up in the air when Harry did not appear, Severus placed a spell on the door so it would not open and proceeded to tear the house apart in his search for him. Twenty minutes later, Severus walked back into the kitchen, his hair sticking up, his clothes covered in dust from crawling around on the floor.

"Where in the name of all that is good is that boy!" Severus said, sinking into the chair.

The cabinet door under the sink opened and out popped Harry, giggling. Severus did not know whether he wanted to choke the child or hug him, so he settled for wrapping his arms around the child as he crawled into his lap.

"What am I going to do with you? Already I can see myself having a heart attack before my time."

Harry just sat in Severus' lap and smiled up at him. Even as Severus tried to look stern, his demeanor quickly broke when Harry gave him a kiss on his face, leaving a big glob of slobber. Severus heard the snicker coming from Lucy.

"Do not even think of mentioning this. I see now I have been bested by a child, and I think it is high time I toddler-proofed the house."

The rest of the day was spent placing charms on the cabinets and doors, and he even had to pull Harry from the under the bathroom sink once. This had scared Severus to death, as Harry had emerged holding a vial of one of his potions. At the end of the day, Severus sat down, knowing the house was as secure as it could be and that Harry wouldn't be getting into anything he wasn't supposed to be.

"Well, now that Harry cannot get himself into any mischief, how about dinner," he called to Lucy. "Harry, come and have dinner," Severus called to the child who had gone into the bedroom an hour before. When Harry came out the door, he was wearing a pair of Severus' shoes, two of his shirts, and a pair of his slacks that reached past his ankles. At the sight of him, the weariness washed away, and Severus burst out laughing.

"Well, I guess my son has shown me that I cannot curb his desire to get into things."

Helping Harry out of the slacks, Severus sat him down in his lap and both of them enjoyed a meal of chicken and mashed potatoes. Severus knew he would need yet another bath, but he wouldn't trade this time with his son for anything else in the world.

Severus noticed that it was just past one o'clock and he still had many things to get done. He had only one day, and then would be returning to his position at Hogwarts to teach the potions class. Severus picked up Harry and sat him down in his lap.

"Harry, I need to go to Diagon Alley and pick you up a few things. Will you be a good boy for Lucy?"

Harry just looked at him, no actual way of knowing if he understood or not, as he was too busy tugging on Severus' hair. Deciding that Harry was not going to answer him, Severus stood up to leave. He walked to the door, and was almost out of it when he heard the sound of tiny footsteps.

Glancing down Severus saw something that tugged on even his normally cold heartstrings. Harry stood at his feet, hands held up, pleading not to be left behind. Severus couldn't bring himself to leave the boy, so pulling his wand from his robe, he transfigured Harry's shirt into a set of clothes and placed a glamour over his scar.

"Lucy, my son and I are going shopping. We will return at dinner."

Lucy thought her master odd, for never had he told her of his plans for the day; he had never spoken to her at all, unless it was to demand something. "This child is going to bring about many changes, many changes, indeed," she thought, walking off to busy herself with a few chores. 


	6. She is not coming back

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 6

Severus did not want to be bothered by anyone who might see him, the Potion Master, toting around a child. Therefore, before he made it to the apparition point, he placed a glamour over himself, giving him auburn hair and green eyes, instead of his dark brown ones. Severus wished he could do more, but Lily had always been the better at charms. He would have to settle with what he had done.

"Remie," Harry said, holding his arms up and smiling.

Severus wondered who Harry was talking about, but slapped his forehead as they stepped out into Diagon Alley. "Of course, I must look like Remus," he thought. "Oh well. At least Harry would not be frightened of him.

Their first stop was to get Harry some new shoes, seeing as he had none on right now. The witch inside fawned all over Harry, telling him what a good boy he was and giving him a sucker before they exited.

Severus pried the sucker from Harry's grasp, and cleaned him up, grumbling about how people never thought of the consequences of giving candy to children. Seeing Harry's forlorn look at his candy being taken, Severus knew he had a lot to learn. He could see Harry's chin start to tremble, but he was not prepared for the flood of tears that fell, nor the hiccupping sobs. Laying Harry's head down on his shoulder, he patted his back, rubbing soothing circle motions until he calmed down.

"Candy is not good for little boys before dinner."

Sighing when he saw Harry swipe the tears away with his fist, Severus thought maybe that the next stop should be the toy store. He would much rather have Harry playing with a couple of toys, than find the boy playing with more of his potions. Walking in Severus was floored. The store was stacked from floor to ceiling with every toy he could ever imagine. Train whistles went off somewhere in the back of the store, and beside him a doll cried out for her mommy. Severus was rooted to where he stood. He didn't know where to start, what toys were good, or what Harry would prefer to play with.

"Welcome, sir, can I assist you and your son today?"

"I am in need of something to amuse the boy, something that will occupy him," Severus said, putting on the act of a non-doting father. He facade fell away, though, when he saw Harry's eyes light up at the sight of the toy broom.

"It seems your son wishes to play quidditch one day."

"He is too young for such things now. I need something for his current age, not ten years from now."

Severus and the shopkeeper talked for a few minutes, deciding on what would be best for a toddler, but Harry had other ideas. He slipped away unnoticed, and Severus found him among the stuffed animals. Severus' heart slowed down to its normal rhythm, and he went to pull Harry out of the huge pile.

"Let go of the bear, Harry."

"No, my bear," Harry said, his grip on it tightening.

Severus tugged, but Harry's small grasp was firm, and the hint of tears at being parted from it had Severus paying the man and departing the store.

They visited many more shops and bought many more things -- shoes, clothes, and even a set of wee robes. They also purchased toys and books to read at night, and much to Severus' amazement, the set of dishes for which Harry had whimpered. Now tired, Severus headed home. His stomach felt as if it had started to eat itself. Plain and simple, Severus was starving.

"Welcome home, Master Snape. Lucy shall have dinner on the table in two winks."

"I would be grateful, Lucy. I will just be putting away the few things we got for Harry today.

Lucy watched as a trail of things floated in through the door and her mouth fell open. Didn't her master say a few things? Yet she saw over twenty parcels float by her. With a knowing smile, she returned to her pot and the vegetable soup she was making.

With dinner filling their stomachs and a nice strawberry shortcake for dessert, Harry yawned.

"I think you are tired, young man," Severus said, taking Harry into his room and putting on his new pajamas. Walking into the bathroom, Severus returned with a wet washcloth. He washed Harry's face and hands, and then tucked him down under the covers. He was about to turn out the light when he heard the soft whimpering. Severus stopped to see what Harry was saying, and it sent ripples of agony through him.

"Mama, I want mama," Harry called over and over.

Severus walked back over and sat down. "Harry, your mum is gone. She is not coming back, but I will take care of you, I promise." Severus didn't think Harry understood. When the boy burst into tears, he knew he didn't. Sobbing, Harry clung to him, his small fists pounding him across the back.

"Mama, mama come back."

The words froze Severus' heart. The tears rolling down Harry's face sending him over the edge, Severus was soon also crying. He cried for his beloved Lily. He cried for the two years he had missed out on in Harry's life. He cried for the pitiful, hurt child he could not comfort. Severus held Harry until his sobs calmed to only hiccups and his grasp lessened.

"Harry?" he called, but the child had fallen asleep. Laying him down on the pillow, Severus pulled the covers to his chin.

"I can't bring your mum back, Harry," he whispered, "but I will be here for you from now on." Severus pulled up a chair to the side of the bed and sat vigil over his son. He would be there should Harry wake again, and would chase away any dreams that haunted him. This was his life now, his heart, his soul, his whole being, and there was nothing he would not do for him. 


	7. But He is Dead

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

chapter 7 ( But he is dead ...)

May 1984

Harry had long since been saved by his real father Severus Snape, but he still referred to him as Sevie, and not daddy. Severus did not mind this name, although if anyone else had even dared to call him this, they would have died a most horrible death, and slowly at that.

Severus woke and entered the kitchen of his home in Shropshire. No one knew that Harry had survived that night, and Severus had no intention on telling them. However, as he sat there pondering the issue, he knew deep down that he could not hide the fact forever. Harry would have to attend school. As much as Severus would like to think of himself as all knowing, he was not the best at charms, nor transfiguration. Potions and defense he could teach Harry when he came of age, but the others he knew Harry would have to learn elsewhere.

"I could send him to another wizarding school," he thought, but he quickly waved it away, as there was no wizarding school to him but Hogwarts. Grumbling to himself, Severus realized he would have to inform someone else that Harry existed, and he could think of only one person he knew to keep his secret -- Dumbledore.

Realizing it was time to get Harry up, he walked into the bedroom. Lying there on the bed was Harry, small for his age and looking all of two instead of almost four. Severus smiled down as he pushed the stray hair from Harry's forehead.

"It is time to wake up, Harry."

Harry mumbled something incoherent, but Severus began to pull the covers away. Harry was ready for him, though, and grabbed the edge of the sheet, wrapping it around himself and curling into a ball.

"Harry, get up this instant! We have somewhere we need to be today."

Harry shot straight up in the bed, pulling the covers from around his waist. "Where are we going?"

Severus could not contain his laughter. "We are going to see Professor Dumbledore. Why is it you will not willingly get up for anything other than surprises?"

Severus knew he would not get an answer from Harry, as the boy did not talk much these days, preferring to play by himself. He waited till Harry came back out of the bathroom and then helped him into his clothes.

"Harry, I have to tell you that I am going to tell him that you are my son." Severus told Harry all of his plans for the day, about how they were going to Hogwarts to tell Dumbledore and then off to Diagon Alley to pick up a few things. He knew Harry could not comprehend what a huge step this was, but Severus' nervousness was getting the better of him, and he rambled on and on.

Harry quirked his head to the side and stared at Severus. "Are we going now?"

Seeing Harry would not wait much longer, Severus took the child by the hand and led him over to the floo. Picking up Harry and holding him tightly, Severus threw down the floo powder and called out, "Hogwarts Headmaster's Office."

Dumbledore was just sitting down to a cup of tea when his fireplace roared and Severus stepped out. What made Dumbledore drop the biscuit in his hand was that there was a child in Severus' hands, and Severus Snape did not like children to his knowledge. Remembering his manners, Dumbledore stepped from around his desk and offered his hand to the Potions Master.

"Severus, to what do I owe this visit, and, more importantly, who have you brought with you?" he asked, looking down at the child still clutching Severus' hand.

Severus picked Harry up and sat him in a brown leather chair and then took a seat beside him, but he could not sit still and stood, pacing the floor in front of the headmaster's desk.

"I thought I could keep this a secret. I thought I could keep him from harm," Severus rambled while pacing.

"Severus! Would you stop pacing and just tell me what this is about and who this child is?"

Severus stopped, face lined with what Albus thought looked like fear. "This is my son, Albus; this is Harry."

Albus' tea cup shattered on the floor. "You can't mean... He is dead, Lily and you, but how?"

"It is a long story, Albus, and one I wish to only tell once. Can we do this perhaps over lunch? Harry has not eaten yet."

"Come, Severus, we will eat in the Great Hall. No one is around today, with the exception of Minerva. Do you have a problem with her knowing as well?"

"I suppose not. People will know sooner or later that I have a son, but we must not let it be known for now that he is Harry Potter."

The Great Hall was expansive and quite scary to the three year old child. Lingering behind his father's robes, Harry was not seen by Minerva until Severus sat down. The gasp was enough to have Severus give her a smirk, and then he helped Harry climb up and have a seat.

For the next hour Severus told them both the story of how he had arrived at Godric's Hollow and found Lily and James both dead. He also told them of the night before when Lily confessed to him of Harry's real parentage.

"I will not have his life in jeopardy any sooner than it has to be. He will be known as Harry Snape until he comes to Hogwarts."

"Severus, think of what it will mean to the wizarding world to know that the one who defeated Voldemort survived. It will give them hope that he will not return."

"I do not care about the wizarding world, Albus! I care about my son, and I will not have him hunted."

"Calm down, Severus. We would not dream of bringing harm to him."

"Minerva is right, Severus, but I think your son has grown too curious about his surroundings."

Severus turned to see Harry looking at all the pictures and talking to Nearly Headless Nick. Harry seemed unaware that the person he was talking to was dead; he only saw a friendly face. It probably helped that Severus sent the ghost a glare to tell him that any showing Harry of his decapitation would have him wishing he were somewhere else.

"Perhaps I could show Harry around for a few minutes, while you and Albus finish with your chat," Minerva suggested.

Severus was reluctant to let Harry out of his sight but nodded his head in agreement. He watched Harry take Minerva's hand and walk out of the Great Hall and did not think anything of it until he heard an earsplitting scream.

Knowing it was Harry, Severus jumped from his seat, pulling his wand from his robes as he ran for the door. Not far behind was Dumbledore, who also looked a bit worried. But as they rounded the corner, they saw Minerva glaring at Peeves.

"You will leave him alone or have Severus to deal with!" she said, pointing her own wand at the ghost who was floating in front of the boy.

"I was only trying to scare the little imp. You don't have to call Severus."

Minerva pulled Harry to her and tried to stem the tears that were flowing down his face, but Harry was not going to be coddled.

"I want my Daddy!" he cried, and before Minerva could stop him, he ran from her arms and straight into Severus'.

"Daddy! The ghost scared me. He is not nice at all," whimpered Harry, who was still clinging to Severus like he was his lifeline.

Severus did not care about Peeves. He didn't care about the people staring at him as he shed tears. All he cared about was that Harry had just called him 'Daddy' for the first time ever. Standing up, he held Harry close to him, afraid to let go, afraid that it was only a dream, until Harry spoke.

"Don't cry, Daddy, I am all right."

Severus swiped away the tears and cleared his throat. "Albus, I am taking my son out for the day. We will have to discuss this some other time."

With a slight nod of his head to Minerva, Severus walked out the front doors of the school thinking what a perfect day it would be to walk. 


	8. New Faces, Old Friends

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

chapter 8 ( New Faces, Old Friends)

Severus knew he was taking a big chance showing off his son in Hogsmeade, so he stopped outside the doors to Hogwarts and leaned down to be face to face with Harry.

"Harry, we are going to go out for the day, but I cannot go looking like I do now." At the questioning look from his son Severus tried to simplify it. "We are going to play a game. I am going to make myself look different, and I bet no one will be able to guess who I am."

"Can I play, too, Daddy?"

Severus smiled at the enthusiasm, but he shook his head no. "You are just fine the way you are." But when he stood to place the glamour on himself, he saw the disappointment on Harry's face."How about we hide that scar of yours, and perhaps we could change the color of your eyes."

Harry was thrilled, and so was Severus that he was still young enough not to know the dangers of being Harry Potter. With a wave of his hand, Severus placed a glamour over his scar and changed his eye color to brown. It was almost disheartening to no longer see Lily's eyes staring back at him, but he was drawn from his momentary thought by the giggles from Harry.

"Daddy, you look different," came the reply from the toddler.

Severus had to admit that when anyone looked at his light brown hair and blue eyes they would never guess he was the snarky old Potions Master. Severus was almost relieved, for he did not have to put on the airs of being the Gryfinndor hater. For today he could just be himself, but Severus wondered who he was exactly. He had played his role for so long he did not know if he could act in any other way, but looking down into the eyes of his son, he knew if anything could change him, Harry could.

Their first stop was the apothecary, of course, as Severus needed many new ingredients. Harry clung to him, not wanting to go anywhere near the rows of dragon tongues or the frog eyes. Just the sight of them had made Harry almost lose his lunch. Severus finished his business quickly and left the store. He watched with amusement as Harry sucked in big gulps of air when he got outside the door.

"That place smells bad. I would never want to drink or eat anything from there."

Severus envisioned all the students at Hogwarts who had asked him on more than one occasion if he purposely made it taste horrific just to punish them. Wiping the smirk off his face, he grabbed Harry's hand and walked across the street.

Walking into the book store sent Harry's eyes wide. He had never seen so many books in all his life. Sure his dad had books, but there were books everywhere here. There were old ones sitting on pedestals, small ones with pictures of rabbits and dragons, and rows and rows stacked on top of each other. Harry let go of his father's hand and was soon found sitting amongst a stack of children's books, eagerly turning the pages.

Severus thought Harry would be quite safe there and stepped behind one of the rows of books to search for the needed Potions tome. Several minutes later he reappeared, a very dusty and very large book in hand. Once he laid it on the counter to be paid for he went to gather Harry from where he sat.

"Are there any books here that you would like to take home?"

"You mean I can have one of these?" Harry asked, his hands full.

"You may have one, but only one, so choose carefully."

Soon Harry and Severus were heading to the Three Broomsticks for a refreshment, Harry toting his new book about Draweyn the Dragon.

When they sat down, Severus ordered a pumpkin juice and some biscuits for Harry and himself a cup of tea. When he turned back to the table, he did not see Harry, he only saw the few sprigs of hair sticking up past the table. With a smile, Severus pulled his wand from his robes and soon Harry was placed on top of a booster seat.

"Daddy, when can I have one of those wands?"

"Not for many years, Harry. You shall receive your Hogwarts letter when you are of age, until then no touching my wand. Is that clear?"

Harry nodded his head in understanding and waited calmly in is seat. His ooh's and ahhh's over his new book were only interrupted by the witch bringing their drinks and snack to the table, and then Harry was littered with crumbs from his biscuit within minutes.

"Daddy, someone is looking at you?" Harry piped up, trying to get his father to stop trying to clean him up.

When Severus turned his head, a gasp spilt from his mouth. In the corner, staring back at him, was Lucius Malfoy. Severus turned as if the man meant nothing to him and resumed sipping his tea, but Lucius was not one to be ignored and walked over to their table.

"A good day to you, friend," Lucius said, his eyes falling to Severus' forearm.

Severus quietly chided himself, for in his rush to leave with Harry, he had forgotten to wear something to cover his dark mark completely. Acknowledging Lucius he turned back to straightening Harry's shirt.

"I do not believe we have been introduced. Are you new to the area?"

"We are indeed," Severus said, hoping Harry would not give away their secret. He was relieved to see Harry was once again more interested in making a mess with his biscuit than the two adults who were talking.

"Would you like to join my son and I for the day. Draco has no one to amuse him, and I must say he becomes bored easily."

"We were just on our way out to pick up a few things," Severus said, trying to think of anything to keep from spending the day with Malfoy.

"Draco and myself were going to shop for a wand." Lucius then leaned over and whispered close to Severus.

"Never to early to prepare them for joining the Dark Lord," Lucius whispered to Severus.

Severus himself wanted to gag even thinking about Harry, or even Draco, joining the rank of the Death Eaters. He knew he would die to prevent his son from ever experiencing that, but giving Lucius a nod in understanding he rose from the table, motioning for Harry to come along.

Lucius and Draco walked into the wand shop, but soon Lucius had left Draco and gone off to talk to the shop owner himself, pulling the man into the back room. Severus walked over to the opposite chair and sat down, wishing he had never stopped for a snack now.

"Hi, my name is Draco, what is yours?" the small blond boy asked Harry, who had returned to his book.

Harry looked up to his father before answering. "My name is Harry."

Severus' heart slowed down when Draco did not press the issue of last names and, for once, was glad the child had forgotten about the formalities Lucius liked to drill into him. Hoping Harry would not reveal anything more, he got up to hurry Lucius along in his finding, so that he and Harry could be rid of his presence.

Lucius was found speaking rather heatedly to the shop owner. "Do I look like I care that he is not of age for a wand. I want you to find one for him, cost is not an object."

Severus knew he would have to intervene or the shop owner would find himself at the wrong end of a wand very soon. Looking back at Harry, he saw wands being flung to the floor, left and right. Draco had picked one up, and Severus went to cringe, but nothing happened, no sparks, nothing.

"Do you see? That is not the right wand for him, nothing happened. Find another one!" Lucius yelled at the shop owner.

"Here you can have this one, it doesn't work," Draco said, handing Harry the wand.

Harry remembered his father saying not to touch his wand, but his childlike mind told him this wasn't his dad's wand and he picked it up, twirling it and giggling when the blue sparks shot out of it.

Looking down at his book, Harry tried the spell the dragon in it said. Not really grasping how to read, Harry's words were grabbled, but the fire that shot from the wand had Harry squealing with delight.

When the light projected off the rows of wands and sent them flying, Harry squealed even louder, bringing Lucius and Severus from the back room to see what all the commotion was about. When Severus saw Harry holding the wand and the bright blue and now red fire shooting from it, he was in shock. He knew if he yelled at Harry to drop the wand, he could very well look like a piece of bacon within seconds. Slowly he crept past the still gaping Lucius and eased his way over to the corner shelf.

"Harry, give Daddy the wand," he said, coaxing the child into handing it over.

"But Daddy it makes pretty lights, see?" Harry said, pointing it at Severus, but the Potions Master was quicker and slammed his body to the floor before the red jet of fire could hit him.

Severus was unused to being at the mercy of a three year old, but when he saw Lucius getting angry at being pinned down in a corner by one, he knew it would not go well.

"Can't you demand he drop it?" Lucius said, his anger barely restrained.

"Would you prefer to be the one who asks for it. I am sure his aim is not that good, and you can hope he does not hit any vital organs," Severus sneered from his position on the floor.

Draco on the other hand was sitting in the corner, arms crossed, a furious look on his face.

"Why did the wand work for him and not for me! I want a new wand, one that is not broken."

"Draco we have no time for your petty arguments right now," Lucius sneered, right before one of the jets of light zoomed right at his head, turning his usually lovely golden locks a nice shade of purple.

While Lucius was using many colorful words to match his hair, Severus eased over beside Harry and gently placed his hand over the wand, taking it from the now pouting boy.

"But Daddy, I made it do tricks," Harry whined.

Severus pulled Harry into his arms, and tousled his hair. "That you did Harry, that you did."

Turning to the new lavender haired Lucius, Severus had a sickening sweet smile. "We must be off now, but I wish you well in your endeavors to change your hair back."

Now waiting to hear Lucius' reply back Severus, and Harry headed out of the shop and back towards Hogwarts. 


	9. At the Mercy of a Child

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

chapter 9 ( At the mercy of a child)

Severus rushed Harry in through the doors, and Harry had to run to keep up with his father. Once safe inside his quarters, Severus placed a silencing charm on the door.

"Harry, I want to try to explain some things. That man was Lucius Malfoy, and his son, Draco. Lucius and I have had dealings with each other, and he has become quite the nuisance, not to mention his son will probably join his father someday in servitude to the Dark Lord, no matter my intentions to try to persuade him otherwise."

Severus was pacing back and forth, his glamour fading, and his hair was turning from brown to black as he spoke. When he looked down to see if Harry was paying attention, he saw the boy just staring. Berating himself, Severus realized a three year old was the beneficiary of his discussion. Taking in a deep breath and kneeling before his son, Severus tried again.

"The man we saw today is a very bad man and will hurt you if he knows about what you look like. His little boy is fine now but when he gets older he will hurt you, too."

Harry sat for a minute taking in what his father had just told him. Then climbing onto the chair next to him, he turned to look at Severus. The brown eyes he had were now turning green again.

"No, Daddy, you said no one is all bad, and I liked Draco. He is funny."

Severus realized he had just heard his own lecture to Harry returned to him from out of the mouth of a child.

"You are correct Harry, no one is all bad, but I wish you never to reveal who you are to either of them."

Severus noted how Harry did not seemed worried about the Death Eater Lucius, nor did he seem particularly wary of what he was telling him. Knowing it was cruel to say to a three year old, but knowing he would get his point across no other way, Severus got Harry's attention before he spoke. "If they find out what you really look like, and if you say anything other than you are my son, then they will take you away from Daddy forever."

"No!" Harry shouted, clinging to Severus, tears already forming. "I won't say anything Daddy, honest. I don't want them to take me away."

Severus calmed his son, rubbing his back in soothing circles until the boy ceased crying.

"Do not worry, Harry. I will not let them take you from me, just promise you will keep your glamour on when they are around."

Harry shook his head yes, and Severus stood, picking him up and taking him over to the kitchen. He sat Harry down and both had a nice lunch of soup and sandwiches. Severus knew Harry would need friends, but the thought of Draco befriending him scared Severus somewhat. Not that the boy was dangerous, but Draco worshipped his father and would tell him anything to please him -- that was what scared Severus.

After lunch Severus found himself even contemplating introducing Harry to the Weasley clan. He loathed being near them for more than an hour or so at a time; their shows of affection and constant rambling made him wish to silence the entire bunch, but his concern was for Harry. Would they shun Harry because he was Severus' son, or would they give him the same doting they did all their children?

Severus knew he could wait for awhile. School would be getting out for the summer shortly, and then Harry would be free to roam the castle, and Severus himself would have more time to consider a playmate for him.

July 1984

Severus and Harry had spent many hours teaching Harry how to write and read. Harry was only going to be four on his birthday, but he was far too inquisitive for his own good and had pestered Severus nonstop until he sat down and started teaching the child. Severus had thought once Harry learned how to read he would not want Severus to read to him before bed anymore, but his fears were put to rest quickly when Harry came to him, book in hand each night, waiting for his Daddy to come and make the dragon noises.

One morning when Harry was sitting on the floor drawing Severus came out of his room dressed in muggle jeans and a blue tee shirt. When Harry looked up at him the laughter reverberated off the walls.

"What is so amusing?" Severus asked, wondering, since he had tried to wear what he thought was appropriate muggle attire.

"Daddy, you look different, and you have on black socks and dress shoes. Only old people wear those, and you aren't old, are you Daddy?"

Severus decided he did not wish to discuss his age, or the fact that he had made the ultimate fashion disaster, considering Harry's giggles and snorts.

"What should I be wearing then?" He asked, his arms crossed.

"White shoes and socks, Daddy."

Severus shuddered, the thought of himself in white socks and shoes was something he could not fathom.

"It is hot outside, don't you want to wear shorts?"

"Shorts?" Severus asked, not knowing what the child meant. The blur of Harry running past him sent Severus' head looking to the direction of Harry's room, but when the child returned with what he deemed shorts, Severus' face paled even further.

"See, like these, Daddy. Are we going somewhere? Can I come with you? Is it for work? Why are you dressed like a muggle, Daddy?"

Severus held up his hand to silence Harry's never ending questions. It had to be a trait of Lily's, for he had not asked that many questions at once ever in his life. Sometimes he thought the child would run out of air, but every time he was amazed when he didn't.

"I am going to muggle London. Yes, you can come, if you hurry, and are you sure I should be wearing those?" he said, pointing to the shorts in Harry's hand.

"Yes, and I will hurry. Do not leave without me. Can we go to the sweet shop? Can we go and see the telly I was telling you about?"

"Harry, cease these questions and get dressed," Severus said, his patience wearing thin.

When Harry closed the door to the room Severus charmed his socks white and then thought of what Harry was referring to when he said trainers. He assumed Harry was talking about those infernal things the students wore on weekends. With a roll of his eyes and a flick of his wand, Severus changed the black shoes into the trainers he had seen before. He would never admit it but his feet were comfortable. He was just transfiguring his long slacks into these shorts Harry spoke of when Harry walked out of his room ready to go.

The giggles started again and Severus was without any patience left. "What now? I have the proper clothing on, yes?"

Harry slapped his hand to his face to stem the giggles from escaping and then stared from his father's legs to his face.

"Daddy, your legs glow like the stars you put on my ceiling. You need some sun."

Severus thought about what Harry was saying and then peered down at his legs. The child was correct; his legs could reflect light at a thousand paces they were so pale. Sighing, he pulled his wand back out of the waistband of his shorts and soon his legs were the same shade as Harry's.

"Is this acceptable now?" he asked, severely hating that his manner of attire was at the whim of a child.

"You look nice, Daddy. Can we go now?"

"We shall leave in one moment, but first I must speak with Lucy. Wait for me by the floo."

Severus did not take long, and then he picked up Harry and stepped into the fireplace. Throwing down the floo powder, he yelled, "Vine Street, London."

Harry laid his head on Severus' shoulder, not wanting to be sick like last time. He now knew about traveling by floo, but that did not mean he liked it. When the swirling stopped, he and Severus stepped out of the fireplace, and Harry found they were in some kind of shopping plaza.

"Daddy, why didn't those people know what I was talking about when I told them of the store we just left?"

"Harry, only witches and wizards can see it, not muggles. We are out today for you to show me what you want for your birthday. If you do not dawdle we can even have an ice cream before we head home."

The squee from Harry sent shivers down Severus' back. He knew he must curb those before the child got any older, or he knew his ear drum might burst. They spent the next hour in the clothing store, as Harry said Severus needed a pair of trainers so he would not have to configure his black shoes. It took all of Severus' restraint to not curse the friendly salesman. Snatching up his shoes, Severus guided Harry from the store before his willpower broke and the man found himself, bound and gagged.

"Where to next, Harry?"

Harry surveyed the shops around and asked if he could go into the toy store, Harrah's. Severus blanched at the idea when he saw the huge teddy bear sitting in the window waving at the passerby's, but the look of joy on Harry's face had him giving in.

"We may go in, but please stay close to me and remember what I have said about not telling anyone your name."

"I thought no wizards came to where muggles live?" Harry said.

"We are wizards and we are here, therefore, others may be here. Always be leery of your surroundings, Harry."

Realizing once again that Harry was staring at him blankly, Severus clasped his hand around Harry's and walked into the toy store.

The cold air was the first thing that hit Severus, and then the noise of over forty children. His instincts told him to run as fast as he could out the door, but Harry was pulling him toward the toys.

"Look, Daddy, this is a ray gun!" Harry said, pointing the gun at Severus and firing it.

Severus was caught unaware and dived to the floor, hand reaching for his wand when the red light on the gun lit up.

"Sir, are you all right?" the saleslady asked, looking down at Severus, who was still on the floor.

"I tripped, but thank you for your assistance," Severus said, standing and straightening his shirt.

Severus then led Harry away from the toy guns, fearful his instincts would kick in and some stray child would be blasted to Wales.

Severus led Harry down the stuffed animal aisle, thinking that it was a safe toy to have. He even handed Harry a green dragon that looked like Draweyn from Harry's book. He immediately dropped it when, after pressing its stomach, the dragon emitted a roar.

"Is there nothing in this shop that does not roar, spin, make noise, or otherwise make me wish to pull my hair out?"

Harry was staring at Severus, and so were many other people. Blushing from the unwanted attention, Harry shrugged his shoulders and crept towards the door. Severus caught him before he made it outside and knelt down before him.

"I am sorry, Harry, but I am not used to such a place. Can you not just tell me what you wish and I will send someone for it?"

"I don't need anything, Daddy. I have fun reading my book at home and drawing pictures."

"Harry, you need something for your birthday!"

Seeing the child was not going to reveal anything, Severus mentally slapped himself. He had once again lost control and had probably frightened the child. When he looked down at Harry, all the excitement from this morning was gone from his face.

"How about a bite of lunch?"

Harry nodded yes, and Severus picked him up and started for the little cafe he had seen down the street. He noticed Harry was sighing a lot, but yet not speaking. He was about to tell Harry how sorry he was again when the sound of music floated down the street. Harry turned his head the same time Severus did, and both saw the whirling lights and the rides that were up ahead. Severus was no fool, and he saw the sparkle in Harry's eyes and a smile flitter across his face.

"Perhaps we could stop by there after a bite to eat. That is if you wish to..." Severus said, looking for some reaction from Harry. The smile was enough to calm his earlier misgivings about trying to hex the people in the toy store, and he and Harry walked inside to lunch.

The waitress came over and took their order, but when she came back, she spoke to Severus.

"Your son is very well behaved. It is not often I see children who are respectful or that quiet."

Severus nodded his approval, but inside his chest was beaming with pride. Of course his son was respectful and good, could he be anything else?

Harry ate all his food, even the broccoli, Severus noticed. He thought Harry must really want to go to these amusement rides, as they were called, for last time broccoli had been put on his plate he swore he would die if he ate it.

"It seems we are ready to leave then." Severus laid the money for the bill on the table, and then he and Harry left out of the cafe and headed down the street to the sounds of the carousel and other rides. 


	10. A Day Out

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

chapter 10 ( A day out)

Harry's face showed more and more excitement as they neared the rides, but he remained silent. Severus wondered if his earlier outburst had effected Harry that much. Severus shook off his feeling of guilt and led Harry over to what appeared to be the tamest thing there, the carousel.

Once Severus had placed Harry on the horse, he sat down in the multicolored chair behind him. His calm demeanor was jolted when the ride started up, but with the first squeal coming from Harry, he was reassured that Harry was indeed having a good time. The ride only lasted a couple minutes, and then Severus found himself being led to the flying elephants.

Severus and Harry rode all of the rides in the children's section of the fair. Severus had even been persuaded to go down the big slide. He did not like the idea of relying on a burlap sack, but when he was plunging down the slide, the second squeal of the day could be heard from Harry beside him.

"Honestly," he thought. "I must squash that noise from him. I curse the gene that gave him that high pitched noise.

Severus and Harry were quite thirsty, as the noonday sun had been beating down on them for over an hour now. They purchased two lemonades from the little stand and sat down in the grass.

"Daddy, do you like the fair?"

Ruffling Harry's hair and staring into his eyes that lit up like Christmas morning, Severus could not deny it. "I am enjoying the day Harry, because I am with you."

Finishing the last of the lemonade, Harry looked around at the bigger kids and all of them seemed to be standing in line for one ride. The fair not being that big, Harry could see the sign hanging above it.

"Daddy, can we ride that ride?" Harry asked, pointing to the sign that said 'Tilt a Whirl'.

Severus watched the ride for a few minutes, his face turning a shade whiter.

"Harry, are you sure about that ride? It does not look very calm."

"Please, can we go on it, Daddy, please, pretty please?"

Severus knew he should not allow it, but the pleading tone and the eyes he could not resist were staring back at him, not to mention there was still a small pang of guilt from earlier. "Very well, if you wish to go on it, then we shall."

When they got to the end of the line, Harry noticed a sign. He was trying to read it, but he could only make out some of the words.

"Daddy, what does that sign say?"

Severus perused the long list of precautions and then stared down at Harry again. Harry was not tall enough to ride the ride without an adult, but there was no way Severus was going to let him get on otherwise anyway.

Soon their turn came up, and Severus and Harry crawled into the silver colored seat. After the bar came down the ride started, right along with the loud music. Severus was looking at the smile on Harry's face, and also trying to plug his ears from the noise of some horrible song. He had to take his hands away from his ears, however, as the ride picked up speed, to keep a firm grip on Harry, who had slid over to the opposite side of the seat. Harry's face was still beaming with a huge grin, that was until the small cart they were in started to spin around, flinging Harry and Severus to the side.

Severus wished to be off this ride, and the sooner the better. His head was pounding from the loud music, and he thought he would rather have his nether regions raked over barbed wire than to ever get on another muggle contraption such as this. He was about to ask Harry how he felt, but the green tinge on the child's face spoke volumes.

"Daddy, I do not feel good. Can we get off this ride now?"

Severus needed no urging, and the next time they slung around to face the ride operator, he spoke to him quickly.

"Stop the ride now!"

It was in no uncertain terms a direct request, but the ride operator seemed to find Severus' request amusing, and soon Severus found that not only had the ride not stopped, but that it was going faster. The next time he was slung forward, his request was not so nice.

"Stop the ride now, you imbecile!"

Severus saw his request was not going to be granted. He wished to curse the boy, but knew that magical Law Enforcement would swarm on the place within minutes. He instead wrapped his arm around Harry and hoped for he best.

His hopes were soon doused, though, when Harry began to gulp in huge amounts of air.

"Daddy, really, I do not feel good," were the last words he said before he lost the lemonade and quite possibly the entire contents of his stomach all over himself and Severus.

Severus could not move. He wanted to console Harry, but there were vast amounts of liquid pouring from him, and it was now being slung in every direction of the cart with each spin. He simply patted Harry on the back until the ride stopped, while wiping the vomit out of his face.

As Severus stepped out of the cart, he had to almost drag Harry out. He walked past the man, meaning to hex him, but Severus had to run to catch up with Harry, who was now leaning over a bush, heaving more of his lunch onto the grass.

"Are you feeling better now, Harry?" he asked when the boy came up from kneeling over the bush.

The tears in Harry's eyes told Severus all he needed to know. Stooping down, he picked up the filthy child and cuddled him close to his chest, which in turn brought on the wave of tears. Harry cried harder and harder until Severus had to sit him back down, Harry falling to his knees sicking up again.

Picking him back up, Severus started walking toward the shop to head back to Hogwarts, but turned to see the boy on the ride snickering at their plight. Severus was furious, not just ordinary rage filling him, but a fatherly instinct that said someone had harmed his child on purpose. Before he could think properly, he found his wand in his hand and the words of the hex spilled out of his mouth.

The boy who had been snickering seconds before was now trying to figure out why his skin was erupting in boils. Severus knew from the shrieks that it was painful, but he did not even bat an eyelash.

"No one harms my son," he thought as he ran quickly for the shop. He had just made it to the door when he heard the familiar popping sound of many Aurors arriving. He smiled to himself before stepping inside. Spying for all these years did have its advantages, the first was being sneaky.

His victory was short lived as they stepped into the floo and Harry lost the remaining contents of his stomach. Now he just laid on Severus' shoulder, whimpering.

Severus had not flooed back to Hogwarts as he had intended to do earlier in the day, but instead he flooed back home. When he stepped out of the floo carrying Harry, he called for Lucy to turn down the bed.

Laying Harry down on the nice clean sheets, Severus scourified the mess off his clothes and pulled the sheets up to his chin. Then grabbing a chair, Severus sat down beside Harry's bed, planning to watch over him until he woke up.

"Sir, you look different," Lucy said from the side of the bed where she was gathering up the dirty clothes.

Severus had forgotten he still had blond hair and blue eyes and quickly took his wand out, ending the glamour. He was about to clean himself when Harry started to whimper in the bed. Severus stood up to calm him, but his arm began to burn uncontrollably.

He didn't wish to leave Harry, but he knew the consequences of not showing up to the summons. Checking once more that Harry was still asleep, he brushed the sweaty hair from his forehead and planted a kiss on his brow. Severus then took off out the door to the apparition point, past the pond.

A/N: See you next Thursday with chapter 11 titled (Don't Hurt my Daddy) 


	11. Don't Hurt My Daddy

Title: What Might Have Been 

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 11 ( Don't hurt my Daddy)

Severus stepped from the apparition point, while also pulling on his Death Eater mask and robes. His thoughts were not on the meeting, not even the wrath of the Dark Lord himself could sway his thoughts from his son, who was at home and not well when he left him. He entered the circle and took his customary spot next to Lucius.

All of the Death Eaters bowed down as Voldemort entered the clearing, but it was Severus he walked up to. Severus gulped down the bile rising in his throat at the shell of a man standing before him. He could not figure out why the Dark Lord was still staring at him, and he dared not to look directly at him, instead he stayed in his kneeling position.

"Severus, my little snake. Rise and tell me why you have come here in the clothing of a muggle, and note that your answer should please me, or you will find yourself wishing you were dead."

Severus mentally kicked himself. He, in his rush had forgotten to change his clothing and now stood before the Dark Lord in trainers and the shorts.

"I was sent by that fool Dumbledore to a muggle apothecary to procure some valuable ingredients. I was told these are the items of clothing that were required for the task. I did not mean to arrive in such a state. Please forgive me milord," Severus said, bowing deeply and kissing the rotting hem of the Dark Lord's robes.

"No matter your instructions from that fool Dumbledore, you arrived before me in these rags. You shall suffer for your lack of thought, Crucio!"

Severus bit down on his lip so hard it bled to keep from screaming out, but Voldemort did not yet release him. It felt like all the other times he had been placed under the curse, only this time he could have sworn he heard screaming in his mind. Before he could grasp what it was, he was released from the curse.

"Stand!" Voldemort ordered, and Severus rose on shaky feet.

Severus had to repress the urge to scream out from his injuries. His mind was still whirling as the crowd of Death Eaters parted and a man and his wife were dragged into the circle by Lucius, who flung them both to the ground, spitting at their feet.

Voldemort turned to Crabbe and Goyle, "Take the woman, do with her what you will. She shall be an example sent to our enemies." Voldemort then turned to Severus, who was favoring his right leg now, his left one bleeding from the rock he had fallen on.

"Severus, you shall prove the allegations that have come to me about you being a traitor untrue. You shall rid us of this muggle, and I wish to see him suffer."

Severus bowed down to Voldemort, and when he did he wiped a tear from his eye. He knew he would have to kill this man or be killed himself. When he stood upright again his face was a mask of anger and bitterness, something he had practiced for years, but inside his heart was breaking. He would someday kill Lucius also, for he knew that the pitiful excuse for a wizard had been the one filling the Dark Lord's head with these thoughts.

"Crucio!" he said, sending the curse toward the defenseless man. The man writhed and squirmed on the ground, but his predicament only sent waves of laughter throughout the circle of Death Eaters.

When Severus looked up he saw Voldemort nodding his approval, and then sent a bone breaking curse at the man. The man's screams echoed around the clearing, but Severus had tuned him out. Severus heard screams, yes, but not the man who lay before him on the verge of death, he heard Harry.

Severus threw the next curse without looking at the man. He did not want to see those pleading eyes again. Severus watched as the man drew his final breath and the Death Eaters dragged his body away. He stood before the Dark Lord and again bowed.

"You did well, my little snake. You will not show up in the attire of muggles again, no matter what that old fool Dumbledore says."

"Yes, my lord," Severus said. keeping his eyes averted. All of this was in vain as Voldemort sent the hex flying toward him. Severus knew that he would not hold it long. No matter how much Voldemort hated him, he was valuable enough to keep around.

Severus held back his screams as long as he could, but the pain of the curse was too much, and he finally let loose a moan of pain. This seemed to satisfy Voldemort, and the curse was lifted. The meeting ended very shortly after that, and Severus took off for the apparition point, pushing past a still gloating Lucius along the way. Severus had been worried at first that Lucius was going to recognize his clothing from earlier in the day, but, as always, Lucius was to preoccupied in the death of the muggle to notice anything.

When Severus arrived near his home, he took off in a run. He could have sworn he had heard Harry screaming when he was at the meeting. Severus' legs still had not recovered fully, and when he swiped the sweat from his brow, his hand came back covered in blood. Knowing Lucy would help him, Severus staggered on toward the house.

Lucy had been in the kitchen wetting the blood soaked cloth when the door swung open. Her master now stood just inside the doorway, clothes in disarray, hair caked in blood, and looking pale even by his standards.

"I am glad to see all is in order here," he said, grabbing the back of the chair to keep from falling.

"What does sir mean?" Lucy asked, wringing the cloth out and grabbing the glass of water on the counter.

"It is nothing; I thought I heard Harry screaming, but it was only my imagination."

Lucy gulped and tugged on Severus' sleeve. "Young Harry was screaming. He stopped, but not before begging someone to simply kill him. He cried and cried, and Lucy did not know how to stop the pain. There was so much blood, and Master Harry kept saying the Dark Lord's name."

Severus jumped from the chair, rushing to Harry's room and flung open the door. Harry was lying motionless on the bed, the sheets around his head covered in blood that seemed to be seeping from his scar.

"What happened here!" he screamed.

"Master Harry kept saying over and over that you were hurting, that the Dark Lord was punishing you for wearing the clothes he told you to wear. I tried to convince him it was not so, but he then started screaming and bleeding. He only stopped twenty minutes ago."

Severus shook his head. This could not be happening, not to Harry. It had been twenty minutes since Severus had gotten to his feet and arrived back home. Did this mean Harry felt all the pain from the meetings with the Dark Lord? Looking down at the small form of his son, Severus knew the answer. Gathering Harry into his arms, he took the boy to the sitting room and told Lucy to watch him while he went to get some potions.

Severus' legs were shaky and his movements down the hall sent waves of nausea through him, but he needed to get the potions. It did not take long before Severus was back with them, and Lucy helped him to sit Harry up, while Severus poured the potions bit by bit down Harry's throat. Harry gasped then choked, but Severus was glad that he had awoken at all, that was until the screams started again.

"Daddy! Do not hurt my Daddy!"

Severus' heart broke into a million pieces. Harry was so small, and yet he had seen things too horrible for a grown wizard. He wrapped his arms around his son, tears rolling from his eyes, down his ashen face.

"Harry, I am here. Wake up for me, son."

Harry's eyes fluttered open and, at the sight of his father, his tears started anew.

"Daddy, you are here now. Why did the bad man hurt you? Why was that man screaming? Daddy, I am scared," Harry sniffled into the folds of his father's arms.

Severus gathered Harry up into his arms and sat back on the couch, his own body begging for much needed rest.

"Does sir wish for me to turn down the bed for Master Harry?"

"No, thank you, Lucy. Harry shall be sleeping with me tonight," Severus said, picking up Harry and walking toward his room. Once he laid Harry down, Severus took off his own blood soaked clothes. His injuries pained him, but the sight of Harry curled into a ball shivering from fear had all thoughts of anything but him fleeing from his mind. Tomorrow they would have to talk about what had happened, but for now Severus took the remaining potion and laid down beside Harry to sleep.

Harry rolled over in his sleep and grabbed Severus' arm, laying his head down on it. Severus looked down at his son and wondered how he could ever live without him. Harry was his sole purpose for living. His son loved him unconditionally, unlike the love he had thought he would receive from following the Dark Lord. Grabbing hold of Harry, Severus pulled him closer, resting his arm across Harry in a protective gesture. Who would have known the Potions Master of Hogwarts loved nothing more than dragon clad pajamas and the little boy filling them. Kissing Harry upon the head, Severus succumbed to the potion and fell into a dreamless sleep.

A/N: See you next Thursday with the chapter (Meet Agatha Thromble)


	12. Meet Agatha Thromble

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 12 ( Meet Agatha Thromble)

When Severus awoke the next morning he saw Harry, still curled up clutching his robes in what appeared to be a desperate attempt to keep him close. Sliding from underneath him, Severus went into his room, dressed quickly, and then called for Lucy.

"Could you make a fresh pot of coffee; I feel a headache already coming on?"

Lucy went off to do as she was bidden, and Severus sat down at the table, pinching the bridge of his nose, trying to stave off the remnants of last nights meeting. He had refused to allow himself to heal after the effects of the curse, thinking of only Harry, as he begged him to stay.

"Would sir like cream or sugar?" Lucy asked, snapping Severus from his thoughts.

"Black will be fine."

Severus sat and sipped his coffee and thought of the best solution to his problem, which was the Dark Lord questioning his loyalty now. That could, in turn, result in his untimely death, leaving Harry with no one. He was so lost in his thought he did not hear Harry wake, and only realized it when he heard the big intake of air. Turning to face Harry's room, Severus saw the child standing there with huge tears in his eyes. When he opened his arms, Harry took off running towards him.

"I was afraid you were just a dream," Harry sobbed.

Severus stood the child at arm's length. "As you can see, I am really here."

"But they hurt you, Daddy; they did awful things to you, and I saw it," Harry said, a fresh set of tears rolling down his face.

Severus sat Harry down at the table and passed him a plate with eggs and bacon on it, as he grabbed his own, though his stomach lurched at the thought of eating it.

"Eat something and then we shall have a talk."

Once Harry had eaten all he wished, which by the looks of the nearly full plate was not a lot, Severus took him by the hand and led him to the couch. Not knowing how to explain everything to a child, Severus sat for too long.

"Daddy, I thought you were going to tell me something."

"You are correct, Harry."

Severus proposed the best way was how the old cogger Dumbledore said -- at the beginning. He explained, without the gory details, how Lily and James had passed on and how Sirius had been placed in Azkaban for his misdeeds.

"You see, Harry, the Dark Lord was angered by you, for you did something no one else could do. You hurt him."

"I hurt that big man?" Harry said, while his eyes grew to the size of saucers.

"Yes, my boy, you really did. Now my loyalties have been questioned, and I know of only one way to calm their fears."

Harry wrinkled his forehead, trying to figure out what Severus was going to say next, but he did not have to wait long.

"Harry, I feel I must against my better judgement reveal to the Dark Lord that I have a son. He must be told that your mother was a witch and that she was going to expose him, so I killed her."

Harry's chin started to tremble, but he put on his bravest face. "What do I have to do, Daddy?"

"Harry, you do not have to do anything. I shall invite Lucius to the manor, and the rest is taken care of, as the man can't keep a secret to save his life. But, Harry, we must place a glamour over your scar when around others. They must not ever know who you really are, and you must never reveal to them your true name."

This was a lot for a four year old to take in, so Severus gave him a few minutes to absorb the information. He could see Harry's brow again wrinkle as he thought long and hard on his father's words, and Severus made sure to keep a stern face to let Harry know of the seriousness of the matter.

"What will I look like with this glamour, Daddy?"

Severus had to fight back the chuckle that was forming before he answered. Leave it to a child to overlook how he could die at the whim of another and only be concerned with what he would look like.

"You will look as you always do, nothing will change except the hiding of your scar, and I think perhaps we will change the color of your eyes to blue when around others."

"Why do you have to change my eye color?"

A piece of Severus heart was broken off as he answered, "Because they are the eyes of your mother, Lily."

Severus spent the next two hours schooling Harry on the do's and don't's in front of Death Eaters and loyal supporters of the Dark Lord. He had gone over each thing twice to make sure Harry remembered, and hoped the child would not forget them at some point, causing both their deaths. Once he was sure Harry had a firm grasp on everything, he picked him up and placed him on the floor in front of him.

"Go and get dressed. We shall go out for a little while, perhaps a picnic."

Harry ran off to his room, and Severus was glad, for he walked over to the fireplace and threw in a pinch of floo powder, before calling out 'Malfoy Manor'. When he stepped from the floo, he came face to face with Lucius Malfoy. The smirk on his face made Severus wish to kill him outright.

"Severus, what brings you here?" Lucius said, the condescending voice driving Severus to take a deep calming breath before answering.

"I came by to invite you and Draco for dinner. I have something I recently found out that I wish to share with you."

Severus watched as Lucius processed that he would find out information, and he held the sneer on his face that he reserved for people like Lucius. He loathed the man and wished he did not have to go through with the plan, but it was the only way Harry would survive.

"Draco and I would love to accept your invitation. We shall be there at six."

With a curt nod, Severus stepped back into the floo and went home. When he stepped out, he found Harry waiting for him, dressed in his new green jumper.

"Where are we going, Daddy?"

Severus walked over to grab both of their coats, and Harry tugged on his arm.

"Daddy, it is the middle of July; we do not need a coat. We will burn up outside."

"We shall need a coat where we are going, Harry; it gets quite windy there."

Harry didn't ask anything else, but the sulk on his face at being burdened down with the hot coat was noticeable. They stepped into the floo, but Harry had been too busy hanging on to Severus to hear where he had called. But when he stepped from the floo, he could see he was in a dirty an old house.

"Daddy, it is dirty in here. Are we supposed to stay here?"

Severus walked Harry over to the window and watched in gleeful fascination as Harry gasped out loud.

"Daddy, we are above the clouds!" Harry squeaked.

"Yes, we are. Stay here while I go and find Ms. Thromble. Severus did not think he would have to worry about Harry wandering away from the window, as he was now giggling about the hawk that had flown by.

Severus walked to the back of the small house and found Thromble hovering over a cauldron, as he always found her. She did not look up when he entered the room, but he instead found himself pinned to the wall instantly by some spell he had not even heard her utter.

"It's not nice to sneak up on someone unannounced, Severus."

"It is of the utmost importance that I came. There was no time to tell you of my arrival."

"Just what is so important that you could not first inform me that you were coming?" the haggard old witch asked as she moved closer to the still pinned Severus. She had almost made it to him when the door flew open and Harry walked in.

"Daddy, guess what I saw!" he yelled, but he stopped short when he saw his father pinned to the wall, a look of annoyance on his face.

"Daddy?" Thromble said, releasing Severus from the wall.

"I would like to introduce you to my son, Agatha," Severus said, his eyes gleaming with glee as he had finally stunned the usually unflappable witch into silence. When she looked at the child clutching Severus' robes, the same one glaring at her now, a look of question came over her face.

"It's a long story," Severus supplied. "Why don't we discuss it over tea?"

Agatha ushered Severus from the back room and went to make the tea. When she came into the sitting room, she handed a cup to Severus and offered Harry a glass of milk. She sat down in the chair opposite them both and shook off the eerie feeling that had come over her.

"Your son, you say, Severus? Perhaps you could enlighten the boy as to who I am, so he will stop glaring at me as if he wished me dead."

Severus pulled the still angry Harry into his lap. "Harry, this is Agatha Thromble. She was a friend of your mother and the only one to escape from the Dark Lord. She lives here now so that he cannot find her. No one else knows of this place, so I will trust you can keep it secret."

Harry sent another glare at the witch before he answered, "She was trying to hurt you, Daddy, I saw her."

"Nonsense, boy! I was caught unaware is all. Your father is still in one piece."

"Harry, Agatha would never harm me, or you now, for that matter. She was merely frightened that we showed up without telling her."

The humph at being called frightened sent a smile across Severus' face. "Why don't you show Harry the aviary, and then we can discuss the matter for which you came here."

"We have no time for small talk, Agatha, not today. Lucius Malfoy will be in my home at six tonight, and he must not know that this in fact is the famed Harry Potter."

"Harry Potter! Your son is Harry Potter?"

Severus, in his annoyance, lifted Harry's bangs to reveal the scar, and Agatha dropped her teacup.

"What is it you require of me, Severus?"

Severus flattened Harry's bangs back down. "I need to know a charm to disguise him when he is in the company of those who would wish him harm."

"Couldn't you perform it, or have one of those at Hogwarts?"

"I would rather not reveal that I have placed Harry in a situation near the Death Eaters to Dumbledore. I feel he would show me the true meaning of fear should he find out. As for my doing the charm... you know Lily was the one gifted in Charms, not I."

Agatha seemed to think things over for a moment and then stood up, pointing her wand at Harry. 'Esconda a cicatriz,' she incanted, and Severus watched as Harry's scar seemed to dissolve.

"This is a very old incantation, Severus, used only in Portugal, and not one known to many, if any at all. The result will only last for five hours."

"I understand," Severus said, silently thanking the witch for knowing what to do.

"What about my eyes, Daddy? You said you would change my eyes from green to blue."

"That is a simple charm that even your father knows," Severus said, pointing his wand at Harry and saying, "Puteulanus." Harry's eyes went from vibrant green to crystal clear blue that matched the sky.

"Now enough of all this talk. I think we should show Harry the aviary before you have to head back."

Severus knew it was a ploy to grab Harry's attention while the adults talked, so he led Harry down the hall and out of the door at the end of it.

"Daddy! There is nothing underneath us! We are going to fall!" Harry screamed.

"The floor is charmed invisible, Harry, as to not alert the birds that they have come inside. You are safe."

Severus watched as Harry slowly edged away from him, trying to sneak up on a nearby falcon perched on a tree. When he thought Harry was far enough away not to hear their conversation, he and Agatha spoke about how everything had come about and how Harry had come to Severus after Lily's death.

Agatha placed her hand over Severus' when it started to clinch into a fist. She knew his darker side. She had been there when Lily had found out about Severus joining the Death Eaters. Severus had come to her after Lily had sent him away. That night they had stayed up for hours talking about his decisions, about how they would only lead to more heartache.

"Severus, you are a fine man, and your son will grow to be a fine boy."

"Am I the one to raise him? Or will my judgements only lead him down the wrong path?"

"Do not doubt yourself so, Severus. True, you are a hard man with little patience in some matters, but I know the man behind all those smirks and sneers, and he has a heart of gold."

Severus let the slightest of smiles cross his face and looked over to where Harry had not only climbed the tree the falcon was in, but now had the prestigious bird perched on his arm and was rambling on and on to it.

"Harry, it is time to be going. We have dinner guests coming soon."

Harry, he could tell, was pouting, but he placed the falcon on the tree limb and walked back over. He grabbed his father's hand, and both started walking toward the floo when Agatha stopped them.

"Wait, I have a gift for Harry."

The surprised look on Severus' face told Harry he didn't know either, but when Agatha placed the necklace in his hand, Severus knew. Severus watched as Agatha placed the necklace around Harry's neck.

"This is a special gift I am giving to you, Harry. Should you ever find yourself in danger just hold it tight and say,'ut salus'. It will return you here."

Harry nodded in understanding, but Severus knew what the necklace was. He himself had been given the necklace when he was small. It had taken him from his room many times after his father's harsh punishments and into the caring arms of the waiting Agatha. He knew if Harry had it he would be safe. They said their good byes to Agatha and stepped into the floo.

Severus had told Harry of Lucius and how he should never know who Harry really was, but how did someone keep a five year old from slipping up? He only hoped Harry realized the danger of doing so. Severus caught a glimpse of the right fireplace, and he and Harry stepped out to have dinner with a Death Eater.

'Esconda a cicatriz- Conceal the scar

Puteulanus - blue

'ut salus' - to safety

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chp 13 (Dinner with a Death Eater) 


	13. Dinner with a DeathEater

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 13 (DINNER WITH A DEATH EATER)

Severus drew a bath for Harry and left him to wash himself while Severus went to tell Lucy to prepare for guests. He had not been gone but a few minutes, but when he returned he found the entire bathroom floor covered in bubbles.

"Harry? Are you in there somewhere?"

All Severus heard in response was the small giggle coming from somewhere behind the wall of bubbles. He mentally cursed the Muggle thing called 'Mr. Bubble' that Harry had asked for, and wondered how such a small amount of it had made so many bubbles. His questions were answered, however, when his foot landed on the empty bottle on the floor and he found himself careening toward a giggling Harry.

"Daddy, what are you doing in the tub with clothes on?" Harry asked as he stared through the bubbles in the tub to see his father.

Severus had landed quite haphazardly in the tub and was now trying to get out of it, but his feet kept slipping on the wet floor. Each time sent him crashing back into the water.

"Harry!" he scowled as he once again fell back. "How is it you get into so much trouble in such a little time?"

Harry grew quiet. Something about the tone of his father's voice told him it was no longer funny, and he tried to scoot to the back of the tub.

"Accio wand!" Severus called and held up his hand to catch the wand sailing in from the bedroom. It only took a second for Severus to clear away the mountain of bubbles and then to grab a towel, pulling Harry from the tub.

"I hope you got clean before your adventure in the bubbles, for we have no time left. Our guests will be arriving soon, and we must be prepared."

Harry's chin began to quiver, and Severus could see the tears frozen in the corners of his eyes. Knowing he had spoken harshly, he knelt down in front of Harry.

"Tomorrow we can have a bit of fun, but this dinner tonight is important. You cannot possibly know the significance of it. You must be on your best behavior." At the nod from Harry, he grabbed him up in a hug. "Do not think you have angered me, understood?"

Severus took Harry by the hand, and led him into the room to get dressed. Harry could not possibly know the simple pleasure that his laughter brought to his father.

Soon Harry and Severus were presentable and Severus muttered the words 'esconda a cicatriz'. It was not a second too soon, as he heard the fireplace flare to life, announcing that their guests had arrived. Lucius Malfoy stepped from the fireplace and behind him came the small blond head of Draco.

Severus was busy muttering the charm to change Harry's eye color, or he would have noticed the strange look Draco was giving him. Once he was done, he slipped his wand into his sleeve and turned to face his guests. He went to speak, but it was Lucius who spoke first.

"You will have to excuse Narcissa. You know you and her do not exactly get along. She politely declined the offer to join us for dinner, but I think it is a nice reprieve as I have things to discuss with you of great importance."

Severus led Lucius over to the table and handed him a glass of brandy, while Draco continued to stare at Harry. This was making Harry uncomfortable.

"You look like someone, I just do not know who," Draco finally said.

"I look like my dad," Harry said, staring at where Severus was standing off in the kitchen.

Draco shrugged off any other thoughts and dragged Harry over to the couch to show him the Quidditch book he had brought. The two boys gazed at the pictures for thirty minutes, until Lucy told them that dinner was ready.

Once Lucius sat down, he turned to Severus with a sneer. "You treat your house elf with too much respect. It does not know its place."

"My house elf is none of your concern, Lucius. I thought we had matters you wished to discuss."

Lucius took another sip of his brandy and shifted forward in his chair to speak in hushed tones. "The Dark Lord is having a meeting next week and he wishes to meet the next generation of his followers. Since I was unaware that you had a son, I am sure the Dark Lord will be pleased to know that you will be training another in the pure blood ways."

Severus' heart clinched in his chest. "Harry is not old enough to attend a meeting. I will not allow it."

"You would defy the Dark Lord's wishes? Severus, even you have to see the folly in doing so. The consequences would be fatal."

Harry and Draco had stopped eating and were now focused on the conversation, both waiting to hear Severus' reply.

"I would not defy the Dark Lord. I simply think Harry is too small to attend. Do you not have the same fears for Draco?"

Lucius sneered, "I think Draco is old enough to know about keeping the bloodlines pure and untainted by Muggle and Half blood filth. You should be teaching your son these same values."

"Bloodlines?" Harry said, a look of confusion on his face.

"Yes, child, bloodlines. Those who are not purebloods should be eradicated from the gene pool. Those with Muggle lineage are not worthy to be wizards."

Harry did not ask anymore questions for he could see the vein in his father's forehead throbbing and that meant he was not happy. He quietly excused himself, and he and Draco went into his room. Once the door was shut, Draco clapped him on the back.

"Can you believe it? We get to meet the Dark Lord."

Harry tried to smile but there were too many questions floating around in his mind. Thinking Draco would tell him things his father wouldn't, Harry asked,"Who is this Dark Lord?"

Harry knew he had said something wrong when Draco's mouth fell open

"That is a joke right?"

Harry wanted to laugh it off, but couldn't bring himself too. "I just have not heard a lot about him."

Draco puffed his chest out as he spoke, "The Dark Lord rose to power, but some baby named Harry Potter hurt him. "

"So what happened then?" Harry asked, his throat going dry.

"The Dark Lord was weakened, but father says he is still all powerful."

Harry tried to hide his worry as Draco spoke about the purebloods and Muggles, but he was very relieved when Severus and Lucius opened the door.

"Draco, come, it is time we left."

Draco left the room, waving good bye to Harry as he went. Harry had waved good bye also, but his stomach was still churning with the stories Draco had told him.

"Severus, I will see you this weekend at the meeting. I am sure Harry will fit in nicely. He is, after all, your son."

Harry waited until both Draco and Lucius disappeared in the flames before he started firing questions off at his father. "Daddy, Draco said the Dark Lord killed people for not being pure, and he said I was a pureblood and had to follow the Dark Lord."

Severus wrapped Harry up in his arms, as he could see the boys knees shaking. "Harry, do not worry about the Dark Lord. He simply wishes to meet you. Do as he says and no harm will come to you."

This seemed to quiet Harry's fears somewhat, but hours later, as Severus laid down in his bed, he could see a tousle of hair sticking up from underneath the covers beside him. It seemed Harry had been frightened more than he thought by Draco's words. He had told Harry there was nothing to fear, and even went as far as to explain the Death Eater mask and had shown it to Harry telling him it was like a Muggle Halloween costume they all wore.

What worried Severus the most was exposing Harry to the Dark Lord. Would Harry know what to say? Would Voldemort read into his mind and see that Harry was indeed Harry Potter? If this came to pass, Severus knew they would both die at the hands of the Dark Lord, but Severus knew that if Albus Dumbledore ever found out where he had taken Harry, that his mentor and friend would waste no time making Severus pay for his grave lack in judgement.

Severus spent the next week with Harry. He had given in to every whim of the child, even going as far as to blow a bubble after placing the whole bag of Drobbles' Best Blowing Gum in his mouth. The bubble had been quite large, and Severus ended up spending an hour trying to get the gum out of his hair.

Severus had been outraged at the sticky mess, but the laughter from Harry almost made it bearable. He did not treasure the thought of the weekend and wanted to keep Harry's mind off the dreaded task. It seemed to do the trick as Harry slept in his own bed the second night, and his face was no longer pale at the mention of the Dark Lord. Harry thought of it now as a huge costume party with everyone dressed the same way. Severus had told him that this was just a gathering of people and that all Harry had to do was be a good boy and everything would turn out fine.

Severus sat every night and prayed for forgiveness, because he knew the sight of the Dark Lord would mortify Harry, but there was no other way, short of leaving everything and everyone behind, and spending their life on the run.

The dreaded day came at last and Severus could not sleep. He had tossed and turned for hours and finally gotten up. He sat now watching Harry sleep, his stuffed dragon clutched firmly to him. Could he do what was asked of him? Could he take Harry to stand before the abomination that was the Dark Lord? Severus did not have time to think on it any longer as Harry's eyes flittered open.

Why are you watching me sleep?"

Severus covered up the smile, "Who says I was watching you sleep? I was just coming to tell you to hurry up and get dressed for breakfast before I eat all the blueberry pancakes."

Harry bolted from the bed and grabbed his robe on the way out the door, yelling as he ran, " Last one to the table is a rotten egg!"

Severus and Harry spent the whole day together. They had a picnic outside under the elm tree, and Severus had taken a picture Harry drew him and placed it on the mantle. They had just returned from a swim in the lake when Severus noticed the time. There would be no time for baths.

"Harry, run and change clothes. Lucius and Draco will be here in a few minutes."

Harry did as his father asked, but he was dragging his feet as he went. He came back in the room just as the fireplace flared up and Lucius stepped out.

"Severus, are you ready? It would not be wise to keep our Lord waiting."

"I am ready," Severus said, placing his arm around Harry as he led him out the door.

The Death Eater mask did not go unnoticed by Harry as it dangled loosely in his father's hand. They all stopped in the middle of the field near the house, Lucius drew his wand, and with a pop, Lucius and Draco apparated away. Severus took a second to lean down in front of Harry.

"Remember, I will be right beside you, Harry. If you feel scared just squeeze my hand."

Harry did just that as he held his father's hand, and they apparated away.

A/N: See you next Thursday with chapter 14 A SCAR YOU CANNOT SEE 


	14. A Scar You Cannot See

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 14 ( A SCAR YOU CANNOT SEE)

Harry opened his eyes to find he was somewhere in a clearing in the middle of the woods, but these were not the woods near his home, nor the woods near Hogwarts; this was somewhere new and creepy. Clutching his father's hand tightly, he started towards the other men all walking with their children.

Severus caught up with Lucius and took his customary place in the circle of Death Eaters. He could feel Harry's sweaty palm in his and knew it was only the beginning of the horrors the child would see. Inwardly Severus hoped it would be a meeting just to see the children and then they would be dismissed, but deep down he knew this to not be true. Voldemort never gave up the opportunity to torture someone, even his devout servants.

Harry waited patiently beside his father. He wanted to ask questions, but thought better of it. When he glanced to his right, he saw Draco, whose head was held high with no look of fear in his eyes, but when he looked to his left he saw a cowering boy not much older than he was. The boy was maybe eight and had tears rolling down his face. Harry was about to talk to the boy when there came a hush over the crowd. When he looked up he could see his father had put on his mask, and when he looked back he saw red glowing eyes coming towards them.

"My loyal servants, I see you have come and brought forth your children. Lucius, step forward and present me with your son."

Lucius Malfoy stepped foward from the circle of Death Eaters, and Draco walked with him. If Draco was afraid, he did not show it.

"You have cunning in you, that will serve us well, young Malfoy. Tell me what is it you wish to do when you grow up?"

"I wish to rid the world of Mudbloods and all those who are not pure, My Lord."

"Lucius, you are raising a fine wizard, one that will help us when he is of age."

Lucius beamed with pride and then took his place back in line as other children were called forward. A few of the children were given praise, but Harry watched as three fainted at the Dark Lord's feet. Those children were hastily picked up by their parents and dragged back to the circle. No comfort given, only glares of disgust at their weakness. Harry was watching as one child's father slapped his son when he heard the dreaded voice.

"Severus, my little snake, bring me your son."

Severus squeezed Harry's hand slightly and walked forward. He knelt before the Dark Lord, and Harry, not knowing what else to do, knelt down with him. When they stood again, Harry came face to face with the Dark Lord.

His eyes were red orbs of malice, his breath a putrid smell that sent waves of nausea throughout Harry, and his skin hung from his body like that of the zombies Harry had seen in pictures. Harry wanted to turn away, but his face was grabbed by a bony hand.

"Severus, tell me again how it is I did not know you had a son until now?"

Severus stepped forward and knelt again, kissing the hem of the Dark Lord's robes.

"His mother and I met in Wales. When she found out I served you, she was going to Dumbledore. I had to kill her, and I took the boy."

"She was pureblood, yes?"

"I would not defile myself with anything less, and had I found out otherwise I would have killed the child immediately."

"He looks like you, Severus -- your hair, your bone structure, but his eyes are not yours."

"Those were his mother's."

"He will make a fine addition to our ranks one day."

Harry's stomach was churning, his hand that had held his father's so tightly before now was balled into a fist. He wanted to cry out, wanted to run as far away as possible, but he did not wish to disobey his father. He was so caught up in his thoughts he did not notice the Dark Lord grab his father until he felt the uneasy feeling of standing there alone.

"Severus, your loyalties have been questioned; tell me now, who do you serve?"

Harry never heard the answer as his mind whirled with anger and fright. His father! Someone, no, something had his father and wished to harm him. He did not mean for it to happen, but soon he saw Death Eaters running for cover as the ball of light flew from him and hit the Dark Lord squarely in the chest, causing him to momentarily loose his grip on Severus. That was all Harry needed to be at his father's side.

"Daddy?" he questioned, but Severus silenced him with a look.

"Severus, your son shows great power already. I commend you on teaching him well, now let me show him what true power can do."

Severus grabbed Harry by the hand and dragged him back to the circle of Death Eaters just as a young man was dragged into the circle and dropped.

"This, my servants, is a man unworthy of his life. True his mother was a witch, but his father was born in a Muggle house. Let us show our children how they should deal with those who are not pureblood."

Harry watched in horror as the man was hexed time after time. The man begged for them to end his life, begged for any kind of mercy, but they showed him none. Harry wondered if this was how all pureblood wizards were supposed to act -- hating Muggles, torturing them until they screamed. He did not want to be pureblood. He didn't want to join the Dark Lord, but his father kept his eyes on the man.

The man knelt before Crabbe and begged for his mercy, but all he got was a broken jaw. When he tried to mumble for his death to Lucius, blood poured from his mouth. The wails of agony as a bone breaking curse was administered, and finally Harry saw nothing but the cold dead eyes of the man staring back at him. This is what is was all about? Death? Those eyes were haunting him, leaving some scar on his innocence that could never be washed away, and Harry, even at five years old, put up a wall where the bad images could not harm him. When Severus grabbed his hand to apparate back, he was no longer the care-free five year old from the day before; he was an empty shell. This was a scar not visible to the naked eye; this one was buried deep down, and no charm could take away the hurt. 


	15. Silence

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death. Yeah I know in canon Voldemort has no body, but for the purpose of this fic he does.

Chapter 15 (SILENCE)

Severus noticed Harry did not speak when they came back into the house; he did not even speak when Severus asked him if he wanted something to eat. Harry only nodded no in reply and walked quietly to his room.

Severus did not know if it had been a wise choice to take Harry to the meeting, but the other option of death was not one he wished to even give any thought. He sat at the dinner table that night rolling the food around his plate, not really wanting anything to eat, not tasting the food.

"Does sir wish Lucy to fix something else?"

"No, I am just not hungry. I think a shower, and then bed."

Severus pushed himself away from the table and walked into his room. When he passed by Harry's room, he did not hear a peep. He wondered if he should go in and see if Harry needed him, but in the end, he decided to give the child a little time to himself.

Severus turned on the water and let it run over his head and shoulders. Usually a shower relaxed him after a meeting with the Dark Lord, but tonight that would not be the case. Shampooing his hair and rinsing off, he stepped from the shower and dressed in a casual shirt and his sweatpants that he had come to be fond of thanks to Harry. He walked out of his room intending to get a cup of coffee and sit down, but the gnawing urge to check on Harry was too powerful, and he found himself drawn to the room off of the sitting room.

When he opened the door, he saw that the sheets were rumpled as if there had been a fight on the bed, but underneath those sheets, he found Harry, clutching his stuffed dragon, tears dried on his cheeks. Severus' heart broke into a thousand pieces at the sight of his son. He knew he had been the cause of this pain, and that was yet another thing Severus had done to betray his better judgement; the first was joining the Dark Lord at all.

Severus tried adjusting Harry on the bed to make him more comfortable, but a whimper coming from Harry made Severus withdraw his hand as if it had been bitten. Not knowing what else to do, Severus debated on staying in the room in case Harry woke up, but Harry turned his face from Severus, and Severus walked out of the door, closing it softly, and walked to his own room, tears beginning to well up in his eyes. He slipped his shoes from his feet and sat down on the edge of the bed. The pitiful wail he had been holding in now escaped from his lips, as tears started to cascade down his face

"It is all my fault," he said, talking to himself. 'How could I take Harry there? How could I subject him to that bastard." Even death would have been better than to take a five year old child into the pit of the most hated wizard, and, should Albus Dumbledore ever find out about it, death would seem a welcome to what he would do to Severus. "I have failed as a father. He will no longer care for me like he once did."

Severus fell asleep, but his dreams were filled with visions of Harry in front of him, turning away every time he reached out to grab him. Severus was in the middle of a very vivid nightmare with Harry being placed under a curse from the Dark Lord when he felt the tiny tug on his sleeve. He could not at first tell if it was his imagination or not, but when he opened his eyes blearily, he saw Harry standing at the side of his bed, dragon in his arms and tears rolling down his face.

"Did you have a bad dream, Harry?"

Harry nodded but did not answer aloud, his eyes still misting up, his shoulders hunched as he tried to stop crying.

Severus got up from the bed and reached out for Harry, but the boy seemed to flinch, so Severus drew back.

"Come, Harry, I will tuck you back in," he said, trying to usher the child back to bed without placing his hands on him, but Harry was rooted to the floor. Severus went back over and sat down on his bed, taking Harry's hands in his own, hoping the child would allow it.

"Harry, for what it is worth, I am sorry. I will never make you go back there again. Won't you please talk to me?"

Harry didn't answer; he only got onto the bed beside Severus and lay down. Closing his eyes, he did not see the tears well up in his father's eyes again. He didn't see the look of hurt at what he had done.

Severus was devastated. He did not know what it was going to take to get Harry back to the carefree child he once had been, but he was determined to do so. He wanted to grab Harry and curl him protectively to him, but Harry's earlier reaction to his touch left him in doubt. Severus was just glad that Harry had come to him when he had the bad dream and now would settle for having him near.

Severus had just about drifted off to sleep when he felt Harry stir beside him. His eyes immediately opened, alert if Harry were to need him, but that was not the case. Severus lay motionless as Harry rolled over and slung his little arm over his chest. The little hand that was not clutching the stuffed animal was now full of Severus' night shirt, fingers intertwined in the fabric, a viselike grip on it.

Severus threw away all the doubts he had earlier and pulled Harry close to him, wrapping his arms around him protectively, and kissing the top of his tousled head. He did not know when Harry would talk again, so he would treasure the moments that he could.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 17 I Would Do Anything 


	16. I Would do Anything

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 16

The next two weeks went by with Harry simply going through the motions everyday. Sure, he ate and sat on the couch reading his books, but he had yet to speak. Severus had tried everything to get Harry to speak, but nothing worked. He had asked about a trip to Diagon Alley, and he and Harry had gone, but the sights and sounds, and even the ice cream, had brought no words from the child.

On the start of the third week, lines of worry could clearly be seen on Severus' face. Harry had refused to do anything for his birthday, even refused the cake made by Lucy, and simply went to bed early that night. Severus did not know why the child had gone to bed, for it had been weeks since Harry had slept all night. What worried Severus most was that even in waking from his nightmares Harry did not call out like before; he would get up from his bed and walk into Severus' room, and Severus would wake to Harry clutching his nightshirt, trembling beneath the covers.

Harry, he knew, had loved Hagrid once he had gotten over the initial shock. So Severus arranged for them both to have dinner at Hogwarts that night. Harry got dressed and held Severus' hand as the flooed over, but he did not have the same smile that he had always had when Dumbledore came to greet them.

"Severus, so nice of you to join us this evening."

"Thank you, headmaster. Is Hagrid here as well?"

Severus did not miss the small look of joy on Harry's face, but it was all too soon gone. Albus led them both through the double doors of the Great Hall and, indeed, Hagrid, along with McGonagall, was waiting inside.

Severus himself was pratically thrown to the side when Hagrid came barreling over and enveloped Harry in a bone crushing hug.

"How are you, Harry?"

Hagrid got no response from Harry other than the half smile. When Hagrid looked to Severus for an explanation, Severus hunched his shoulders.Hagrid led Harry over to the long table and sat him down, filling his plate with various things.

While Harry was being coddled by Hagrid and Minerva, Dumbledore motioned Severus over by the door.

"Severus, is there still no improvement?"

"None, headmaster."

"I do not understand what has brought about this sudden change in him. He seemed like such a carefree child, so warm and loving. Have you any ideas, Severus?"

Severus occluded his mind swiftly, before Dumbledore could sense his lie before he spoke it.

"I do not know what troubles him, but he has been this way since he saw Draco and Lucius."

Dumbledore's face clouded over with thought.

"What were Lucius and Draco doing at your house? I daresay it was not what I am thinking."

"You are indeed correct about Lucius' coming to the house; he spoke freely of the Dark Lord and how Harry would make a good Death Eater someday."

Dumbledore frowned at this, though he had no idea of the full story, and Severus was not about to tell him for fear of reprocussions.

"Perhaps Harry could do with a change of friends. Draco is still young and, therefore, will follow his father's lead. I hope there is hope for him yet, but why not expose Harry to other children."

"I will take this into consideration, Headmaster."

Severus and Harry sat and listened to all the start of term discussions. It was but a mere three weeks away, and Severus had not thought of his plans once. Usually he was diligent in making things out a month ahead of time, but the problem with Harry had kept him busy.

He excused himself and Harry after dessert and waited while Minerva and Hagrid hugged Harry goodbye. The child not not return the hug, but simply stood there like a rag doll, limp, hands at his side. It was disheartening, and Severus knew he would have to think hard on Dumbledore's suggestion.

When Severus stepped from the floo, Harry followed and plopped himself down on the couch, taking his book off the coffeetable and starting to read, ignoring everyone else. He had only gotten three pages into the book when his eyes started to droop and he fell asleep.

Severus wanted to put him in his bed, but Harry looked so peaceful there on the couch that he had not the heart to move him. Instead, he covered Harry with a blanket and then, bidding Lucy a good night, went to bed.

Upon entering his room, Severus made sure to leave his door open so he could hear Harry should he wake. To be honest with himself, Severus was starved for sleep. Each night Harry bolted into his room, waking him, and every night he had rocked the quivering child back to sleep. Tonight he hoped for eight hours of uninterrupted sleep, but not too long after his eyes had closed, he heard whimpers coming from down the hall.

Severus groaned and then rose from his bed. He heard the whimpering become louder and louder, and knew Harry was in the midst of another of his nightmares. Severus wanted to comfort him, wanted to make all the bad images go away, but though Harry would not tell him what plagued his dreams; Severus had a good idea, all the same.

When Severus made it to the couch, he saw Harry sitting up, eyes wide with fear, tears rolling down his face and dripping off his chin onto his knees. He was curled up into a protective ball, clutching at the blanket, until Severus sat down beside him.

Harry leapt from his position and latched onto Severus' nightshirt, holding on for dear life. This was not some ordinary dream, this was worse. Little by little, Severus coaxed Harry's fingertips from his shirt, and soon he was holding Harry's hand, while rubbing his back with the other. Harry's brow was soaked in sweat, his eyes puffy from crying, and Severus wanted to reach inside and pull all the hurt out.

He sat there for an hour rocking Harry, whispering to him that it would be all right.

"I am here, Harry; I am not going anywhere," he said, hoping it would somehow get through to the still trembling child.

Just before dawn, an exhausted Severus watched as Harry relaxed in his arms. Carefully easing out from under him, Severus walked into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of black coffee. Sitting down, Severus placed his head in his hands, rubbing his temples, trying to stave off the headache forming from his lack of sleep.

' What am I going to do?' he thought and only realized he had spoken outloud when Lucy came over to his chair.

"Is there something I can help sir with?"

Severus shooed Lucy away and drank down the last of the bitter coffee. He was about to get up when an idea struck him. It was a horrible one. One he loathed to do. To be honest Severus would rather face down twenty dementors than this, but if it was for Harry then he would do anything.

Walking over to the floo, Severus rubbed his eyes and tried to clear his mind. He ran his hand through his hair and placed what he hoped was a congenial look on his face. Then throwing the powder in the floo, he called out, "The Burrow."

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 17 A Talk at the Burrow 


	17. A Talk at the Burrow

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 17 (A TALK AT THE BURROW)

George and Fred Weasley were a playing game of exploding snap in the sitting room when the fireplace roared to life and out stepped Severus Snape.

"Mum, we have company," yelled George, who stared at the tall man before him dressed in black.

"Well, George, who is it?" came the reply from the Weasley matriarch, who was preparing the evening meal.

Charlie Weasley came around the corner to see who had come for a visit and dropped the plate he had been drying for his mother.

"Mum! It's Professor Snape from Hogwarts," he said, staring at the dreaded potions professor, the very one that made his life miserable during each class.

"Severus, such a surprise for you to come. Won't you join us for dinner?" Molly Weasley said, drying her hands, and ushering the solemn man towards the kitchen. "Arthur should be home any minute now."

Sure enough, the tall, red-haired father of the Weasley household stepped through the kitchen door, as Severus Snape was being pushed into a chair. Severus could see the absolute wonder that, he, Severus, was in his house, but his face was a mask of smiles as they sat down to dinner.

The other children were called to dinner and everyone sat down to eat, but Severus was not eating, he was staring at the many red-haired children. Here were seven children, and yet all seemed happy and talked nonstop throughout the entire meal. Severus wondered how Molly and Arthur kept their sanity.

Soon the meal was over and Severus realized he had barely touched his food. He had spent most of the meal watching the interaction between the children and their parents. Molly and Arthur stood up and ushered him into the sitting room, while the children played in the corner. After he was seated on the sofa, Molly spoke.

"Now, Severus, what brings you to The Burrow?"

Severus Snape was not one to ever ask for help, and he couldn't quite bring himself to do it now, so he covered up his embarrasment with a question.

"I did not know your house was so plentiful with children. How many do you have now?"

Molly stood up and called all the children into the room, and, to Severus, they looked like little stair steps standing before him. None of them would look at him directly, except for the biggest one, who glared at Severus as if asking why he had dared to enter their house. Severus looked away from him as Molly started her introduction with the tallest of the bunch, the one who had stared down Severus.

"This is Bill; I believe you have him in your fourth year potions class."

Severus indeed knew he had the boy in his class. He ridiculed him nonstop, but secretly he thought the boy had a knack for potions, as he was always one of the first to complete his.

"Now we have Charlie here who just started Hogwarts last year. He is a Gryffindor, of course. Percy here is two years away from starting school, I am afraid, although last week he did try to sneak past us to go with his brothers. Always wanting to be the leader of sorts, he is."

Severus' head was already whirling with the three faces he had seen and there were more.

"Now we have the twins here. This is Fred, and this is George," she said, pointing to two identical faces. They looked eager for trouble and Severus knew he would have his hands full in a few years with these two.

Severus watched the twins snicker at him, plotting it almost seemed. His attention was brought back as Molly continued on with her introductions.

"This is Ronald and Ginny. Ron is five and Ginny is four."

Molly was finally finished with the children and all of them went back to what they were doing before she had called them over. Severus was at a loss, but finally his lips started to move, and out fell his earlier question.

"How do you keep seven children and have them all seem so happy?"

"It doesn't take much," Molly beamed. "You just have to let them be themselves and love each of them despite their flaws," she said, pointingly staring at the twins as she said it.

Severus brought his voice down to a whisper and told Arthur and Molly about Harry. Both were shocked, and Molly had even started to cry at one point.

"I thought the poor child had died that night in Godric's Hollow. Now I know that he is alive and well and it warms my heart to know Lily and James' memory will live on."

Severus twitched at remembering back to that faithful night, but he then dived into the story, after placing a silencing charm around them. He told them both how it was he, in fact, that was Harry's father and how Lily and James had told him only the night before the Dark Lord had them killed. Molly had fainted after the information and had to be ennervated by Arthur. Once she was back in the waking world, Severus finished telling them about Harry and his refusal to speak. He did not tell them about taking the boy to see the Dark Lord, that he knew would have caused Molly Weasley to hex him to death.

"I see your problem, Severus, and we would be delighted to let Ron come over for the night, or have Harry here."

Severus didn't know if he could leave Harry alone anywhere for the night, but decided if it were best for Harry, he could allow it. Plans were made to drop Harry off the following night for a sleepover. Severus departed and soon stepped out into his own sitting room and was met by the face of Lucy.

"Master Harry did not waken while you were gone; Lucy watched him just like you asked."

Severus thanked Lucy and went to sit beside Harry. He was lost in thought, wondering how he could possibly let Harry out of his sight, when Harry's eyes fluttered open. He didn't speak to Severus, but the smile on his face made Severus envelope him in a hug.

"Harry, why don't you go and get ready for dinner. I have something to tell you after we eat."

Harry shuffled out of the room, and Severus began pacing the floor. He knew he couldn't possibly let Harry leave his sight; he would worry nonstop. He was racking his brain when he stopped, bumping into Lucy.

"Is something troubling sir? Is it something Lucy can help with?"

Severus waved Lucy off, muttering as he did, "There is nothing you can do, unless you have a way for me to keep tabs on Harry in case of danger when he is not here." Severus was now muttering outloud his concerns and he didn't care.

"How could I have been such a fool, telling the Weasleys I would bring him over. I can't do it; I simply refuse to let him go unguarded."

He didn't see Lucy apparate out, nor did he hear the pop as she returned. He only noticed the house elf when she tugged on his robes incessantly. Finally irritated, not with her but with himself, he yelled down at the two huge eyes staring up at him.

What? Why are you tugging on me?"

"Lucy is sorry for bothering Master Snape, but Lucy is wanting to know if Master wishes to use these," she said, handing Severus what looked like two lockets.

"Why would I want these?" he spat, his anger escapig him.

Lucy cowered beneath his stare, but she spoke up, "These were Master Snape's mother's and father's. It was a way for Master Snape to keep an eye on Mrs. Snape when he was out with the Dark Lord."

Severus snatched the lockets, loathing the items. He remembered how his mother was forbidden to take it off. His father had made her wear it so he could see if she tried to escape the house when he was gone. He was about to throw them into the trash, when something occurred to him. As much as he loathed them for what they stood for, he knew he could watch Harry and make sure he was all right while at the Weasley's.

Looking down he saw Lucy cowering at his feet and shook his head. "Forgive me for my earlier anger, it was not directed towards you."

This seemed to brighten Lucy's face and she got up and happily went back to making dinner. When Harry came out of his room, he took his seat at the table and started eating, without so much as a sound. Severus, too, finished up his meal and then ushered Harry to the sofa by the fire.

"Tomorrow you shall be going to the Weasley's for a sleepover."

Harry's eyes grew wide with fear, and the clawlike grasp on Severus' robes was immediate.

"Do not worry, Harry, I will only be a floo away. You remember how to use the floo, right?"

Harry nodded his head yes, but his grip on Severus' sleeve was still as tight as ever, and now he had his head buried in the folds.

"I have something for you, Harry, a gift."

Harry lifted his head out of his father's robes and saw the lockets in his hands. He did not back away as one was placed over his head; something about it made him feel safer when Severus placed the second over his own head.

"This is a family heirloom," Severus did not tell Harry what the locket was for, he only made him promise not to take it off. He and Harry then sat by the fire as Severus told Harry about all the Weasley children, and how they seemed to have fun and that he hoped Harry would as well.

"They have a son your age, too. His name is Ronald, but I think I heard his brothers calling him Ron. Perhaps you two can play together."

Harry nodded his head yes, but he was scared to meet anyone else new. He had met Draco, and they had become friends very quickly, cowering in fear near the Dark Lord, but would Ron like him? Harry fell asleep laying there next to Severus.

Severus picked up Harry and started walking towards his bed, but at the last minute turned and walked down the hall to his own room. He didn't have the heart to leave Harry right now, so he gently placed him on the bed and pulled off his shoes. Climbing in beside Harry, he pulled the covers up and watched as Harry curled into a ball.

How was it that this five year old boy, soon to be six, had complete control over him? He would do anything for Harry -- kill, maim, and even be the father that his own never was. Running his hands through Harry's hair, he vowed he would be there for him. He didn't think he would ever be the doting father Arthur Weasley was, but Harry would know he was loved. Tomorrow he would send Harry into the Weasley home and pray for the best, but he knew he would be home pacing the floors until his son's return. Curling up and pulling Harry to his chest, he wrapped an arm around him; the boy's whimpers faded, and Severus Snape fell asleep, content.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chp 18 (I Want to go Home) 


	18. I Want to go Home

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 18 ( I Want to go Home)

The next morning dawned and Severus woke, pulling the still-sleepy Harry from the bed and ushering him towards the bathroom to wash up. Severus went to the kitchen and sat at the table to eat, and it was not long before Harry emerged wearing a green shirt and a pair of pants. His hair was uncombed, and there were remnants of dried toothpaste on the corner of his mouth. Usually Severus would have chuckled at the sight, but his stomach was already turning flips. Taking Harry by the hand, he led him back to the bathroom, combed his unruly hair, and wiped his face again.

When Severus appeared back in the kitchen and sat down, there was a steaming stack of pancakes on his plate.

"Lucy?" he said, turning his head toward the house elf, who was busy wiping up the counter.

"I thought I asked you just for coffee this morning?"

"Sir did ask me for coffee, but sir needs something to eat, so Lucy made sir pancakes."

Severus normally would have argued the point, but when he glanced over at Harry, he could see the boy pushing his own food around his plate. Picking up his fork, Severus brought a bite of food to his mouth and instantly regretted it. He was worried about letting Harry go and his worry had his stomach churning to the point of being sick.

"Nerves, it's just nerves," he told himself, but he pushed the plate away after only two bites and saw Harry do the same.

"Harry, are you ready to go? The Weasleys are expecting you at ten."

Harry gulped down the swallow of juice he had taken and stared blankly at Severus. His eyes showed fear, but he said nothing. Severus would have given anything for Harry to scream he wasn't going, that he was staying home with his dad, but Harry uttered not a sound.

Grabbing Harry's overnight bag that Lucy had packed, Severus walked over to the floo and stepped in. He motioned for Harry to join him, and Harry shuffled his feet inside the fireplace.

As the fireplace grates whizzed past Severus' stomach lurched. He wanted to maim the wizard who had thought up the idea of traveling by floo. It had never set right with him, always bringing him to the point of losing his meal. He was very happy when the Weasley's grate popped up, and he grabbed Harry by the collar and stepped out.

"Severus, so good to see you looking well," Arthur Weasley said, shaking Severus' hand. "This must be Harry, who we have heard so much about."

Harry said nothing, his eyes riveted to the five faces staring back at him. They looked harmless enough, especially the one boy Harry's size, but Harry had not released his grip on his father's hand yet. Before his mind adjusted to the first five, two more faces joined the others, two identical faces.

Severus knelt down in front of Harry, handing him his overnight bag. "I am just a floo away should you need me. Do you know how to get back?"

Harry rolled his eyes and nodded his head, but said nothing. His grip on Severus' hand was tightening.

"He will be fine, Severus; I will see to it. Come, dear, you look absolutely famished. Let me fix you a spot of breakfast, put some meat on those bones," Molly said, taking Harry by his hand and leading him away to the kitchen.

Severus just stood there, making no move towards the floo. He wanted to run to Harry, to tell him that he didn't have to stay and that if he never spoke again it would be all right with him, but Severus knew that was not going to do Harry any good. Telling Arthur he would be at home all night should he be needed, Severus then stepped into the floo, giving one last look at Harry as he was seated at the table.

Harry sat down, his stomach rumbling, but he did not wish to eat with so many people staring at him.

"Is it true? Are you Harry Potter?" Fred asked, his mouth full of eggs. A smack to his head sent the eggs flying out over Percy's plate.

"Fred Weasley, how dare you," Molly chided. "Eat up, Harry, dear."

Harry didn't want to eat -- he wanted to run home as fast as he could, where there was no one staring at him -- but he could not deny the smell of the freshly scrambled eggs and sausage had his mouth watering. He took a bite and found they tasted as good as they smelled, and soon his plate was as empty as Ron's. He was full, but he watched in horror as Ron devoured another plate of eggs and two pieces of toast.

"Why don't you go and show Harry around the house," Molly said, pointing the spatula she was washing, "and no funny business from any of you."

Percy went off and stuck his nose in a book in the sitting room, and Charlie and Bill went outside to degnome the garden. That left Harry with Ron and the twins, Fred and George, since Ginny was helping her mother.

"So, mate, wanna play a game or something? Dad has been teaching me how to play chess."

Harry sat down while Ron explained chess and then found himself being beaten four times. The fun of the game ended when Ron declared he had won again, and Harry stood up, wandering over to the mantle to stare at the pictures.

"You sure don't talk, do you? Mum said you didn't, but I thought she was only fooling us." Harry's whole body tensed up from these words, until Ron placed his hand on his shoulder.

"That's fine with me, though, usually no one hears me, either, over Fred and George making so much noise. Come on, how about we go and watch them play Quidditch?"

Harry had heard of Quidditch before and couldn't wait until he was older so he could play too. He once had asked his father if he could have a broom, but Severus had told him he was too little.

When they walked out into the backyard, they found Charlie and Bill flinging gnomes around by their feet and over the fence. Harry thought it looked funny and even laughed, despite his best efforts not to. He didn't get to watch long because Ron was pulling him along by the shirt towards what Harry thought was one of the best things he had ever seen: Fred and George were on brooms, flying at least twenty feet off the ground. When they spotted Harry and Ron coming towards them, they landed and walked over.

"Glad to see you came outside, Harry."

George looked at Ron with raised eyebrows when Harry said nothing.

"Ever ridden a broom, Harry?" George asked. Harry shook his head no, and George snickered. "We have been riding for at least a year. Mom wouldn't let us get a proper size brooms yet, says we would break a limb, but she lets us fly about on these," he said, pointing to the broom slung over his shoulder.

"All you have to do is say up and the broom will go right into your hand, mount up and you can take off," Fred replied, handing Harry his broom.

Harry wanted more than anything to ride the broom and, in the end, after ten minutes of staring at it, he spoke the word. 

"Up!" he said, rather more forcefully than needed.

The broom shot straight into his hand, and Harry mounted it just like Fred had showed him. He was surprised when it began to lift off the ground, but he was more surprised that he loved the feeling. It was better than anything he could have imagined. He flew past the twins and over the fence, where Charlie had to duck to keep from being hit. He flew for a long time, enjoying the wind in his face and the thought of being free, until Fred called him back over.

"Your a natural, Harry," he said, patting Harry on the back.

"Never seen anyone take to a broom like that before, you'll be Quidditch captain someday," George added.

The boys took turns riding the broom all afternoon, until Molly called them in for dinner. Everyone seemed famished, and Harry did not have to be told to eat this time. He ate everything on his plate and then sat back quite content. He was happy, but yet feeling a little bit tired.

"Why don't you boys go and settle Harry in. He can sleep with Ron tonight."

Ron led Harry up a winding staircase and opened the door to his room. Earlier Molly had charmed the bed into two beds, both with the blazing orange duvets with the words Chuddley Cannons on it.

"This is my room. It is the smallest, but I like it, because it's mine and I don't have to share with Fred and George. I slept in their room once when I got scared, and they set my flannels on fire by accident."

Harry sat down on the bed that his bag was sitting on and stared around the room. There were posters on the wall of Quidditch players flying around and a banner for Hogwarts that said Gryffindor. He thought it was a very nice room.

Ron started gabbing away and didn't even stop when Harry stepped in the bathroom to change clothes. He was still talking when Harry sat back down on the bed.

"You know I always thought Snape was a Death Eater, but I guess since he is your dad, he isn't."

Ron didn't notice Harry's grip on the sheets tighten, or the look of panic cross his face. Harry remembered the meeting all to well. He remembered the words of how he would make a fine Death Eater someday, of how it was destined to happen because he was pureblooded. Harry didn't hear whatever Ron said next, as his mind was whirling with the horrific things he had seen that night, but his ears perked up with the words "pure blood."

"See, we are pure blood wizards, too, but mum and dad said they would rather die than join forces with him. Never had any family member in anything other than Gryffindor since Gran was around. Mum said it was a shame that people raised their kids to think they had to become Death Eaters.

Harry fought back the bile in his throat and opened his mouth. It was dry from non use, so the words came out almost in a croak. "Just because you are pure blood doesn't mean you have to join forces with Voldemort?"

"Gah! Don't say his name, Harry. It's like an omen, you know."

Harry sat back on the bed. His mind really was racing. He had thought that because Severus had to be a Death Eater, he did too. Severus explained to him a long time ago about being a spy for Dumbledore, but Harry had seen first hand what Severus had to go through. He didn't want it, he never had, and he had been scared since that night. Little did he know Severus was home right now pacing the floors with worry.

"Would sir like a glass of warm milk to calm him before bed?"

Severus looked up from in front of the fireplace where he had been pacing back and forth for over an hour. "I am fine, Lucy. I think I will retire to my room for the night. It is quite late, and I wish to be up early to go and get Harry."

Lucy boldly walked over to where Severus was, blocking his path to his room. "Lucy knows sir is worried, she can see it in Master Snape's face. He will talk again soon, Lucy just knows he will."

Severus sighed deeply. "Perhaps you are right. I will achieve nothing worrying about it. Goodnight, Lucy," Severus said, stepping past the house elf and going to his room.

Once there, Severus got into his nightclothes and sat down on the bed. He wanted to relax, but he couldn't. His mind raced with thoughts of Harry. It was his fault Harry was not speaking, his fault the child had no joy in him now. He berated himself silently, until his head began to throb. He thought about getting up for a potion to ease it off, but knew it was only from stress. Severus laid back down, hoping morning would hurry up and come. The clock beside him read only eleven, and he knew it would be many more hours until Harry would be back home. Figuring the faster he fell asleep, the faster Harry would be home, Severus closed his eyes.

Molly had come in, told the boys it was past time for sleeping, and spelled all the lights in the room out. It didn't really matter, for the moonlight streaming through the window lit up the room quite nicely. The last explosion from Fred's and George's room had been heard well over an hour ago, and Ron looked as if he were getting sleepy. Harry knew he had to ask now, before Ron fell asleep.

"Ron, if someone's parent were a Death Eater would it mean they had to be a Death Eater too? I thought all pureblooded wizards had to be one."

"Who told you that load of rubbish?" Ron said from his bed. "Mum and Dad would disown me if I even thought of becoming a follower of You- Know-Who. Look, Harry, just because someone's parents are off their rocker, doesn't mean they have to be. Of course no one has to be a Death Eater, pureblood or not; we are purebloods and you don't see us out killing Muggles, do you? Look, I am tired, so I am going to sleep. You should too. Mum calls us early for breakfast."

Harry's face lit up with the knowledge of what Ron had just told him. For months now he thought he had to join Voldemort, and now he knew he didn't. Everything would be fine now. Clutching his stuffed dragon, Harry jumped out of his bed. He didn't heed the yells of Ron, wondering where he was going. He knew where he was going, back home to tell his Dad the news.

The dark staircase, which would have frightened him before, didn't bother Harry at all as he stumbled down it. He ran past the kitchen and didn't stop until his little feet were standing in front of the fireplace. The pot of floo powder was up high, and Harry was quite short. Even on his tiptoes, he couldn't reach it. Harry began to cry quietly. He wanted his Dad. He wanted to tell Severus that he was okay now, that he understood. It wasn't until he felt Molly's hand on his shoulder that he looked up.

"You want to go home, don't you, Harry?" she said, softly stroking his hair.

Harry could see that Ron had woken his Mum, probably after he had bolted from the room. He didn't want to hurt Ron's feelings, but he wanted to go home.

"I want my Dad," Harry sniffled out.

"Come dear let us get you dressed, then I will take you home," Molly said.

"No, I want to go now, please. I really like it here, but I have to tell Dad something. Maybe Ron could come over soon and spend the night with me."

"Very well," Molly said, ushering Harry inside the fireplace.

Harry glanced over at Ron and could see his eyes already glazing over with sleep. He saw Mr. Weasley come over and tell Ron to get back to bed, and Ron turned to go, but stopped.

"See you, Harry," he said, waving as he walked away.

"Snape Manor," Molly said, after tossing the floo powder in, and soon Harry was whirling past grate after grate.

Harry hoped he was stepping out fast enough, and when he saw the familiar face of Lucy he knew he was home. He didn't stop to say hello, or even explain why he was home. He ran down the hall towards his father's room. Harry burst through the door, which brought Severus sitting straight up in his bed, wand at the ready.

"Dad, I don't have to become a Death Eater, Ron said so!" Harry yelled, bounding onto the bed.

Severus was in shock. He had woken up not only to a ruckus and his door being flung open so hard it clanged on the hinges, but now before him was Harry, tears drying on his face, talking rapidly. Wait... talking? Harry was talking!

Severus flung his arms around Harry, the sound of his voice filling Severus' ears. It was the best sound in the whole world to him. He sat while Harry explained very fast what Ron had told him, and then looked at Harry with big eyes. After Harry ran out of breath and finally stopped, Severus spoke. "This is what has been bothering you? This is why you stopped talking?"

Harry nodded his head in affirmation.

"Why?" Severus questioned. "Why didn't you come and tell me?"

Harry stammered, his voice barely above a whisper, "I thought you would be angry. I don't ever want to join Voldemort. He is mean and hurts people; he hurts you, Daddy."

Severus hung his head in shame for what he had done to the child. He knew these were his own issues and should not have been placed on one so young. "Harry, I am sorry I ever took you there. It was my fault for thinking he would leave you in peace afterwards. I made a decision, a very bad one long ago; the same one you will have to make someday, I fear. I am confident you will make the right one, whereas I chose poorly. You never have to go back there again."

Harry clung to his father, his palms twisting his nightshirt into a ball. "I don't want you to go back, Daddy. He hurts people; he'll hurt you."

Severus pulled Harry's chin up to meet his gaze. "I go for you, Harry, so that I can give information to save people. I will make this promise: I will never leave you willingly. It would take all the dragons in the world to take me away from you."

Harry hugged his father and led him away by the hand. Severus wondered where the child was leading him, until Harry pushed him down in a chair in the kitchen. Lucy was there even before Harry could call for her. Harry went over and whispered into her ear and soon the table was filled full of eggs and sausages and a lovely stack of steaming pancakes

"You didn't eat breakfast this morning, Daddy, and I know you are hungry; I can hear your stomach talking."

The room was so silent you could hear a pin drop, until Severus burst out laughing so loudly he almost fell out of the chair.

"What is so funny?" Harry asked.

"You spend a few hours with Molly Weasley and already you are trying to feed me. That woman has been trying to fatten me up for years."

Harry had to laugh too, as he had never seen his father laugh so hard that tears ran down his face. That night, even though it was really one in the morning, they sat at the table, just father and son, and ate a lovely breakfast.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 19 (More than the Moon and Stars) 


	19. More than the Moon and Stars

Title: What Might Have Been 

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 19 (More than the Moon and Stars)

Severus was so happy to see Harry speaking again he sat through an entire day of the overexcited six year old's endless rambling. It seemed to Severus the child would never stop when suddenly he looked up from the picture he was drawing and stared with wide eyes at the potions professor.

"Daddy, what did mum look like?"

The question made Severus choke on the tea he was sipping, sputtering it down the front of his robes. After grabbing a napkin to dab up the mess, Severus looked down into the innocent eyes of his son.

"She looked much like you do now, only her hair was the color of a falling leaf in the last days of autumn."

"Was she pretty, did you like her? What kind of things did you do, Daddy? Did you take her for rides on the broom like you do me? Did you tuck her in at night?"

Severus' mind was whirling with so many questions aimed at him all at once. Placing his cup of tea down on the table he sat down on the floor next to Harry. "Let me see, if I recall correctly your mother's favorite thing to do was go to the beach and watch the waves roll in. I, myself, never took her, but she spoke of it often saying how soothing the sound of the waves was, and how the glimmer of the sun setting on it reminded her that things of beauty still existed in the world. As for tucking her in at night, I am afraid your mother was a bit busy tucking you in to be tucked in herself. Many nights I found her asleep by your crib, her hand laying on your back."

Severus, in his remembrance, had forgotten the small child staring up at him, that is until Harry pounced into his lap.

"Can we go to the beach, Daddy?"

Severus tickled Harry until the child screamed for him to stop, before standing up and bringing the still giggling Harry with him, "Go and ask Lucy to pack a lunch for us, and I will see about taking you."

In a few minutes, Harry stood before Severus dressed in his robes, his jumper, and trainers, ready to go.

"Wait a minute, Harry, the beach is very hot and I am afraid you would be no more than a puddle should you wear all of those." It did not take Severus long to return Harry to his room and dress him appropriately. After that, Lucy was handing him not only a basket with their lunch pack in it, but also another bag.

At the questionable look from Severus, she spoke. "Lucy has packed things Master Snape may need for today. Lucy is knowing about the beach, and Lucy wants you to have everything you need."

Severus did not look into the bag, thinking he would leave that for when he got there. House elves could be so strange he thought, but he stepped out into the backyard and shrunk both bags, placing them in his pocket, before helping Harry onto the broom.

Severus was enjoying the ride through the countryside and it was ending all to soon as they approached the heat of the noonday sun. Severus was wishing he had worn something besides black when the broom crested over the hill and the smell of salt air hit him, along with a flying sea gull.

Severus glared at the sea gull, thinking of turning it into something wicked and eatable, as he cleaned the drippings from his shirt, but a squeal from Harry brought his attention back to the sight of the ocean before them. Once he looked at it, Severus was mesmerized by the glare of the sun off the water, the salt air filling his nostrils. He landed and took the two bags from his pockets, bringing them back to their normal size as Harry ran through the white sands of the beach.

The first was the basket of food Lucy had prepared, and Severus realized the house elf had packed enough to feed a small army. In the other bag, Severus found all the things he, in his haste to leave, had forgotten to pack. Inside the bag were towels, sunscreen, and a couple of pails.

"Silly elf, does she not think I know of a shield charm from the sun." Severus saw a note inside, though, and opened it up.

_"Sir,_

_Lucy knows you were forgetting something so Lucy packed the things sir needed. Lucy remembers Miss Lily was much better at charms than sir, so she packed the sunscreen, too."_

Severus chuckled to himself. Lily was indeed much better at charms than he was. Throwing down the bag on top of the blanket he had spread out, Severus took off his shirt and went to join Harry, who was splashing in the waves as they rolled on shore.

After many hours of playing in the water and looking for the 'perfect' shells, Severus went to sit on the blanket and relax. Harry had far too much energy for him, he saw, and he really wanted another glass of the strange drink Lucy had packed that she called Lemonade. He noticed Harry seemed to be having a good time, and the questions about his mother had all but ceased as soon as his eyes saw the ocean. Severus didn't know whether to be happy about it or not, but settled for the contentment of the day. Soon he would be back at Hogwarts placing the mask of hatred firmly on his face for every house but his own. He would be taunted, and jokes would pass about his greasy hair or his nose that was hooked. Today, though, he was Harry's dad and enjoying every minute of it.

Harry played along the shore until the sun started to set. It was growing colder now, despite the day having been very warm. He ran back up to the blanket and noticed his father was staring off into somewhere unknown.

"Daddy?" he said, waving his small hand in front of his father's face.

Severus blinked his eyes and smiled down at the now shivering Harry. Taking Harry's shirt out of a bag, he pulled it over the child's head and pulled him into his lap. This was the time Severus loved, it was like he could feel Lily here, her spirit floating to the shore like the waves lapping at his feet now.

"Daddy, did you love Mum?"

Severus was startled by the abrupt question, but he answered it without any hesitation. "I loved your mother more than life itself, more than the moon or stars."

"That's a lot of love. If you loved Mommy that much, then how do you have any love left for me?"

Severus broke his gaze away from the setting sun and looked at Harry. "I will always have enough love to give to you. Never doubt that."

This seemed to put Harry at ease. "Look, Daddy, the sun is touching the water!"

Severus noticed how the sun's rays were just settling across the horizon of the waves and a sigh escaped his lips.

"What is it, Daddy? You seem sad."

"Not sad, Harry, just thinking about your mother."

"What about her?"

Severus was silent for a minute longer, but then he spoke, not to Harry, or anyone else, but more like he was recalling a time past that was only alive in his memories.

"I was thinking about your mother, about how her hair was the color of the sun setting across the water, about her love for the sound of the waves rushing up to meet her toes. It would make her laugh as she ran away, the waves giving chase. She was beautiful, more beautiful than the moon, the stars, more beautiful than anything I could have ever imagined. She saw in me things I could not see myself and looked past all the things people said and gave me her love."

Harry didn't know what to say. His young mind could not fathom everything his father had just said, but even he could guess that his father and mother loved one another. They sat there watching till the sun completely drifted behind he ocean. It was then that Severus picked up the now sleeping Harry and straddled the broom. He hovered in the air for only a second, relishing the look of the moonlight water before wishing his beloved a goodnight also, then Severus took off to get Harry home and tucked into his own bed.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 20 (Breakfast in Bed)


	20. Breakfast in Bed

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 20 (Breakfast in Bed)

August 1987

Severus had spent the last two weeks getting ready to start the new term at Hogwarts, and finally he was done and in need of some peace and quiet. Severus had found out that yet another of the Weasley children would be attending Hogwarts the upcoming year -- Percy, if he were not mistaken. At least it was not the twins. Severus thought he might want to retire before they enrolled.

Severus had been sitting on the sofa for over an hour, relishing the peace and quiet... 'Wait, peace and quiet? Where is Harry?' Severus got up and walked into the bedroom, but Harry was neither there nor in the loo. Severus' heart began to beat a little faster. He flung open the back door and yelled for his son.

He found Harry playing next to the lake, a strange hunched over seven year old peaked Severus' interest and he found himself venturing out to where Harry was sitting. Once he got there he saw a pot with some sort of black sludge in it and wondered what the boy had gotten in to.

"Harry...what is it you have there?"

"Daddy! Look what I made," he said, pointing at the pot and grinning from ear to ear.

Severus peered closer, but flinched back when the smell hit him. "What is this in the pot, Harry, for it smells like the droppings of one of Hagrid's creatures."

"I put in some things from the kitchen and a couple of dead frogs I found."

Severus wrinkled his nose at the smell, but felt he must ask the next question. "Just exactly what from the house did you put in there?"

Harry placed his finger to his chin in thought, leaving a black smear across it from the sludge. "I put in some vinegar and some of that butter you like so much, three strawberries so it would taste good, and some of the mud from the side of the house, you know, where Lucy throws the grease out."

Severus raised an eyebrow to that one, but Harry jumped to his feet.

"I swear, Daddy, the frogs were already dead; I just pulled their legs off like the ones in your potion jars."

"Be that as it may, Harry, you smell distasteful and in high need of a good bath."

Harry's chin started to tremble. "Aren't you even going to taste it? I made it just for you, Daddy."

Severus shuddered at the black glop in the pot and couldn't bring himself to say yes. "I would have enjoyed it, but Lucy already has dinner ready. If we do not eat it her feelings will be hurt. You wouldn't want that, would you?"

Harry shook his head no, but he still looked on the verge of tears.

"I promise the next time you make me something I will enjoy it, just not before meal time."

This seemed to satisfy Harry. He wrapped his arms around Severus and then took off running inside the house. Severus looked down and saw his robes were now smeared with the concoction Harry had created. With a flick of his wand he cleaned them and then removed the contents of the pot before the smell of it took his breath away.

Dinner was a pleasant smell after the mixture from outside. The pot roast and fresh potatoes had Severus' mouth watering, and the Potions Professor swabbed each piece with enough butter for four. Harry giggled as the butter ran down Severus' face, but his own was full of the same butter.

Dinner was always Severus' favorite time of the day. He and Harry would talk about the things each had done that day and make plans for other days. If there were problems, they usually discussed them over dessert, and by the end of the meal both were smiling. Severus was glad to see Harry's plate clean and gave him two scoops of ice cream for dessert.

"Young Master Harry was making sir a potion today. Did sir enjoy it?' Lucy asked.

Severus choked on his ice cream and changed the subject quickly. "Harry, I have invited Draco over for the day tomorrow. His father and I have a few things to discuss, and I thought you would like to have someone to play with."

Harry was excited, so excited that he even bathed and got into bed without the usual claim of not being tired.

"Goodnight, Daddy," he said, before hugging his father.

"Goodnight, Harry," Severus said and went to leave.

"Daddy, you didn't tell Draweyn goodnight," Harry said, pulling his stuffed dragon from underneath the covers. It was rather worn now, but Harry loved it all the same.

Severus sighed, but before he walked out the door he whispered goodnight to the stuffed animal and prayed no one ever found out.

Severus had gone to bed early the night before, knowing he would need all his patience to deal with Lucius. He had slept wonderfully, not waking even once during the night, and now he was laying in his bed relishing the comfort that came with morning's first light.

He was oblivious to the noise coming from the kitchen, or the small squeak coming from Lucy as she ran to and fro trying to clean up the mess. He didn't even open his eyes until he heard his door creaked open and saw Harry at the foot of his bed, tray in hand. Severus opened his eyes and saw the tray held a daisy, more than likely from the field outside, and a glass of pumpkin juice, but it also held a bowl, which Severus thought must be oatmeal.

Severus' mind had forgotten about the sludge from the day before until the tray was placed across his lap and inside the bowl was something green and gooey. Placing a smile on his face, Severus looked to his son who had taken a seat beside the bed.

"It looks lovely, Harry. Can you tell Daddy what it is in the bowl?"

Harry stood up from the chair and climbed on the bed with Severus. "I put in oatmeal cause you said breakfast had to be healthy, and then I added some of the potatoes from last night. I know you like them, cause you ate three, and then I put in some of your coffee so you could have it without it burning your tongue. Oh yeah, and I put in the rest of the frogs from yesterday, daddy, cause you said never to be wasteful and they were just sitting there with no legs."

Severus' face paled at the thought of what was sitting in the bowl before him.

"Eat up, Daddy," Harry said, jumping up and down on the bed.

"Didn't Lucy make breakfast?" Severus asked, stalling the best he could.

"No, she made me breakfast, but I told her I was making yours, so she went to go do something outside."

Severus could see he was not going to get out of this, so he picked up the pumpkin juice and took a big gulp, savoring the taste, but not touching the bowl yet.

"Aren't you going to eat it, Daddy? You said the next time I made you something you would eat it, and I worked hard on this. Do you know how long it took me to mash up the frog like you do with your potion ingredients?"

Severus wanted to run as fast as he could away from the bowl and his son. His perfect night was now coming to a crashing halt. Slowly he picked up the spoon and placed a small amount of the sludge in it. The smell was not as bad as yesterday, thank goodness, but the bits of frog mixed with the oatmeal was almost more than his stomach could take.

"Hurry up, Daddy, Draco will be here soon."

Severus saw no way out of it and opened his mouth, shoving the spoon in and swallowing fast so he would not taste it. The taste was horrid, the bits sticking to his tongue like peanut butter. Bite after bite he forced down his throat until only one remained. he just couldn't eat it, his stomach was already churning with the urge to throw up. He knew if he ate the last bite, it might push him over the edge.

"Well, go ahead, Daddy, we should be getting ready," Harry said, fiddling with the sheet on the bed, his eyes riveted to the bowl.

Severus prayed to whomever was listening to keep his food down, but as the last bite went down, Severus could feel his stomach gurgling, promising to take revenge for the foul things he had eaten.

"Daddy, why are you sweating?" Harry asked, but his answer was cut off as Severus flung the covers back and took off in a run towards the bathroom.

Over and over he paid for eating the contents of the bowl. Now Severus lay resting his head on the porcelain of the commode, praying his stomach was empty. He usually would have accioed a potion, but realized his wand still lay underneath his pillow and he didn't have the strength to call for it.

Just as he went to stand and clean himself up, the last remnants of what Harry had given him came hurtling from him. Again Severus was laying face first in the commode, and this is how Lucius found him.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chp 21 (Potion Making) 


	21. Potion Making

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 21 (Potion Making)

"Severus, do you always start the morning out this way?" Lucius grinned maliciously down at Severus.

Severus snarled at him, but the thoughts of getting up to quickly were not an option. "As you can see Lucius the thought of your arrival today has me indisposed." Severus looked at Harry who was still standing in the doorway looking very worried now.

"Harry, would you go and tell Lucy that I will be needing a headache potion. Seems I am feeling a bit under the weather."

Harry left immediately, and Lucius took great pleasure in watching Severus wipe the sweat from his face with the cloth, and clean his robes of the bile on them.

Severus and Lucius came from the room and Lucy was waiting with a headache potion for Severus. After he downed it his stomach returned back to normal, and he turned to Harry.

"I would like to thank you for breakfast. I enjoyed it immensely. How would you like to show Draco the lake?"

Harry grabbed Draco by the arm and dragged him out the door promising to show him how to make a potion for his dad. Severus shuddered just a bit thinking of it, and turned to face Lucius.

"What did you deem so important that you had to come to the house today?"

"Severus, the Dark Lord wonders why Harry has not been to see him again. Seems he is quite fond of your son, even going as far as to say he reminded him of the Potter boy."

Severus reined in his emotions, wondering if Lucius had noticed the color of Harry's eyes. "The Dark Lord has seen my son before. I do not see the need in taking him again."

"You would defy the Dark Lord?" Lucius said, eyebrows raised.

"I would do no such thing, but I have not received any word that our master wishes to see my son. I will not subject him to the going ons at the meetings before he is ready. I think it is you Lucius who wishes to make a spectacle of Harry, and I won't allow it."

Severus hoped he would not regret those words for Lucius was shady if nothing else, and he would do anything if he thought it would benefit him in some way, even turn in Severus.

Lucy brought both men cups of tea and a few biscuits, but she did not leave. She stared at Severus and waited for him to acknowledge her.

"What is it Lucy?" he said a little more irritated than he meant.

"Lucy, must speak with sir alone. Lucy has something very important to tell him."

"Letting your house elves dictate to you are you Severus? How shameful."

"I, unlike you do not treat them as if they were vermin. I prefer to keep the help fit enough to actually do the work around the house. Now if you will excuse me I will be right back."

Severus got up and followed Lucy into the study and placed a silencing charm on the door. He knew Lucius would try to eavesdrop as he was nosy, and he was curious as to what Lucy wanted. He watched as Lucy fidgeted, wringing her hands.

"What is it Lucy?" he asked, wanting to hurry back before Lucius pried around the house in search of any information he could use against Severus.

"Lucy did not know if sir wished it, but Lucy saw Master Harry without his charms on. Lucy placed the charms on Master Harry before he went out to play. I hope I have not angered you."

Severus broke into the widest grin, and enveloped Lucy into a hug. Lucy was frightened, thinking she was about to be flailed for her misdeed and screeched until she saw that indeed her master was not angry.

"I thank you Lucy for in my state this morning I was not thinking clearly."

Glad that Lucy had charmed Harry's scar away Severus came back out of the room a new man, leaving Lucy to tidy the room giving her an equal gleeful look. Severus' mood changed however when he saw that Lucius was not in the kitchen where he left him, and the door was standing wide open. Severus hurried his pace not wanting Lucius anywhere near Harry.

It only took a couple of minutes for Severus to get down to the lake, and sure enough that is where he found Lucius. Coming to stand beside him he startled Lucius when he spoke.

"Do the games of children amuse you more than I Lucius?"

Lucius turned in a whirl, his hand firmly grasping his wand. "Do not sneak up on someone like that Severus. I am merely watching the children to make sure they do not get into any mischief as little boys tend to do."

Harry and Draco were oblivious to the two adults standing there watching them. Harry had shown Draco the joys of creating potions as he called it. Draco had been quick to correct Harry telling him that was not a potion, but the lure of simply making a mess was too much for the boy and he too dived into the game.

It was not long before he came back covered in dirt and mud, and holding a very small pail full of something that turned Severus' stomach again thinking back to the day Harry had handed him something similar.

"Look father at what I have made you," Draco said proudly showing him the contents of the pail.

Harry was showing Severus his own, and like a father was supposed to Severus praised Harry for his efforts. Lucius on the other hand turned his nose up to the rather offensive mess.

"Dispose of that at once Draco for we must be leaving, and then come here, we cannot return home with you in that manner. You look like some filthy muggle beggar."

Draco handed his potion to Harry and went to stand next to his father. His face was a mask of nonchalance, but Severus knew the boy was hurt by his father's words. What was more shameful was that Draco could hide his emotions so well at only seven.

One look at Harry and Severus could tell he was about to explode. He was a little more than upset that his friend was one leaving, and two, going without his potion.

"Draco! don't forget your potion. If you can't have it now maybe you can have it later," and with that Harry started walking toward them both. Harry's clumsiness was Lucius' downfall for after no more than five or six steps towards them Harry tripped and Draco's sludge landed in Lucius' hand, and all over his face.

Lucius yelled in fury, "What is this horrid stench?" he said as he tried to wipe his mouth clean.

"I told you to add more frog legs Draco. Yours only had four and mine had five," Harry chimed in.

Lucius went pale and grabbed Draco by his shirt apparting just in time as Severus fell to his knees in laughter.

"What is so funny Dad?"

"Harry, the look on Lucius' face was better than anything I have seen in a long time."

"You mean he really didn't like Draco's potion?" Harry said not really understanding.

"He has not acquired a taste for the finer things it seems," Severus said dodging the question. He would regret not telling Harry the truth one day soon, but that was not today.

Harry leaned over to grab the now empty pail and slipped, sending his own potion all over Severus. He jumped back in horror wondering if his father would have the same reaction as the other man, but all he got was a face full of mud.

"Dad! That is not fair I only tripped and spilled it on you, but you did that on purpose."

Severus' eyes gleamed, "I believe I did indeed," he said.

The two of them spent the next hour chasing each other with huge balls of mud from the banks of the small ditch near the water, and by the time Lucy could be heard calling them to dinner, both of them were very dirty.

"Dad, I think you need to do that whirling thing with your wand or Lucy is not going to let us in the house."

Severus looked at Harry who had glops of mud falling off his head and then looked at himself. "Perhaps you are right. I do not think Lucy would appreciate us tracking mud through the house."

With one quick motion he called for his wand, and once he had it placed a cleaning charm on the both.

Dinner was very good, as Lucy had made a roast with chopped onions, carrots, and potatoes. Harry had eaten all of his and then went to sit and draw. It had become one of his favorite things to do lately, and tonight was no exception. Even the offer of dessert couldn't tear him away once he got started.

Severus took a piece of the cake Lucy offered and went to sit down beside Harry and see what he was drawing and noticed it was a picture of the ocean.

"That is a very nice drawing Harry," he said as he took another bite of his cake.

"It's not finished yet Dad and I don't want you to see it because it is a surprise."

Severus agreed not to look and sat quietly in his chair reading the newspaper till it was time for Harry to go to bed. Once he got Harry tucked in he handed him his stuffed dragon which looked a little beaten up after all these years, but Harry would not part with it. Placing a kiss upon Harry's brow he walked to the door.

"Dad?"

"Yes Harry," Severus said, turning around at the door.

"I will make you breakfast in the morning."

Severus' stomach lurched at the thought, but he wished Harry a goodnight and went to make sure he had potion nearby come morning.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 22 ( No More Food) 


	22. No More Food

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 22 ( No More Food)

When Severus opened his eyes he felt refreshed and the smell of eggs wafting through the door of his room, made him think Harry had not woken in time to make breakfast. Severus was more than happy to not have to eat what his son may procure, and dressed quickly.

As Severus sat down at the table Harry handed him the newspaper and then handed him a plate of eggs. Relief washed over Severus, and the sight of the perfectly normal scrambled eggs in front of him had him looking at Lucy.

"Lucy helped me make the eggs Dad, but do not worry I made you something all by myself too."

Severus was afraid to ask, and he ate the eggs slowly hoping Harry would forget about giving him the other, but as soon as his plate was clear of the eggs Harry took his plate and replaced it with a bowl of something quite horrible. Swallowing the lump in his throat Severus turned to Harry and smiled.

"What have you made me today?"

Harry grinned from ear to ear. "I made your favorite dad can't you tell?"

Severus tried to distinguish what it could be and then it dawned on him. "Is it porridge?"

Harry grinned again. "You are right!" he yelled.

Severus smiled back and looked at Harry who was staring at him from across the table. "Aren't you going to have any?"

"Dad you know I don't like porridge, so I only made enough for you. Hurry up and eat because I wanted to know if we could visit Ron today, and you said I could, and they are expecting us to show up soon."

Severus could not fathom why his son felt the need to make him breakfast, but the look of pure love in Harry's eyes had him lifting the spoon to his mouth. Perhaps, he thought it would not be that bad, but after the food entered his mouth he knew better.

"What are these crunchy things Harry?"

"Peanuts Dad, and the squishy things are the frog legs you like so much. I mixed them in after it was done because last time they got all gooey do you remember?"

Severus did remember all too well, and he shuddered despite himself.

"I also added some lemon juice and jelly beans. I don't know what flavor they are though so I guess it will be a surprise."

Severus looked to Lucy who at once went to get the potion she was sure her master would need. Raising the spoon to his mouth again, Severus tried to smile at Harry, but then the taste of the vomit flavored jelly bean mixed with the frog legs had his stomach churning. He ate the rest of it as quickly as he possibly could and then excused himself.

Severus made it to the bathroom not a moment too soon. He had survived the curses thrown at him by the Dark Lord, but Harry's surprise treats were more than he bargained for. Leaning over Severus felt the familiar sweat that came with being sick, and soon he was again laying on the cool marble of the bathroom floor, wishing he had not eaten that last bite. Lucy brought Severus the headache potion but it could not rid the shudders after he thought of the meal. Getting up and washing his face, Severus knew he was going to have to explain to Harry somehow that he should refrain from inventing anymore things to eat.

After a lengthy conversation about how Lucy would be offended if Harry didn't stop making such wonderful breakfast, Harry agreed to only help Lucy if he was so eager. Severus was more than happy to agree to that, and his stomach still was not ready to face the Weasley clan, but he had promised Harry.

Gathering up his cloak and Harry's they stepped into the floo. Severus grabbed Harry and held him close and soon they were whirling past many grates, their destination The Burrow.

Within seconds of stepping from the floo Molly had whisked Harry up and sat him down at the table trying to feed him breakfast yet again. Harry politely ate a few eggs but then claimed he was full.

"Severus, come and have a bite to eat as well, you look absolutely famished," Molly said, ushering the still nauseated man to a chair.

Severus looked down as Molly filled his plate with eggs and bacon and thought perhaps that he could eat one bite or two until she placed the creamed chipped beef atop his plate, and that instantly had him holding back the urge to gag.

Grasping his coffee Severus pushed back the plate, grabbing a single piece of bacon to munch on and watched as Molly scowled at him.

"I am glad you came by Severus, Arthur has some things he wanted to speak with you about."

Severus turned his attention to the matriarch of the Weasley clan. It was not often, if ever that Arthur Weasley spoke to him. To know that he had something vital to say was remarkable, Severus thought.

"Harry why do you not go up and find Ron. He should be in his room."

Harry looked to his father and saw him nod in approval and took off in a run towards Ron's room. Severus waited till he heard the door slam before he got up and walked into the sitting room.Once there Arthur and he spoke of a meeting that Severus was shocked he had not been a part of.

"Severus the muggles in Shropshire were beaten and murdered in the streets they say. They raped and pillaged the houses for anything of worth, and you say you didn't attend this meeting?" Arthur asked in amazement.

"I am not privy to the Dark Lord's every move Arthur."

The adults spoke quietly in the sitting room for an hour and then it was Severus who called for Harry so they could leave.

"Dad, you promised I could visit all day."

Severus leaned down to make eye contact with Harry. "I will not be defied in front of others Harry, we have spoken about this," he said a little too harshly.

Harry didn't say anything else, as he told everyone goodbye and left with his father. When they stepped back out of the floo in the cottage Harry went straight to his room, closing the door behind him and sat on his bed moping. He didn't come out for lunch, and when Severus went to collect him for a snack Harry told him he didn't wish any.

"Harry, I know I spoke with you harshly, but I cannot stress enough that young men should respect their fathers. What if it had been Lucius instead of the Weasley's you had spoken in front of?"

Harry looked to his father, confusion settling in his green eyes.

Sighing Severus went on, "Something of that nature is frowned upon in the Dark Lord's circle and is dealt with in a severe manner. Draco has been whipped until he bled for speaking as you did then."

Harry's eyes went wide, "I will be better Dad, I promise."

Severus knew Harry would not defy him again in front of others, and went to tell Lucy to prepare Harry's favorite dinner. Just as he was walking to get Harry for dinner, the floo flared and Lucius Malfoy stepped from it. He was not in his usual regal black robes, but instead in another set of robes, ones Severus recognized immediately.

"Lucius, what brings you here to my home, unannounced I might add."

"Severus, when have I ever needed to announce my comings and goings to you."

At the ice cold glare Severus sent him Lucius spoke quickly. "The Dark Lord needs your expertise as it is immediately. I have been sent to fetch you."

"I have received no summons from our Master," Severus said, his hand going instinctively to his mark.

"This is not a meeting Severus, only the Dark Lord's need for you. If I were you I would not keep him waiting either, he seems a bit upset."

Severus looked to Harry's room and told Lucius he would be ready in just a moment. Walking into Harry's room he closed the door and placed silencing charms around it.

"Harry, I must go out for a while. If you are in need of anything just ask Lucy. If anything goes wrong floo straight to The Burrow and inform the Weasley's. Do you understand?"

Harry nodded his head yes but before he could ask anything else Severus had kissed him upon the top of the head and left his room. Harry wanted to follow but as he got closer to the door he heard a voice, not anyone's voice, but that of Draco's father, and he feared that man. Closing the door back he sat down and waited till he heard the whoosh of the floo before going out.

Lucy tried to get Harry to eat, but the food grew cold while Harry sat there. He was worried, his father hadn't come back yet and it was almost seven. He told himself he would wait another hour to see if he came home and then he would floo to Ron's house. Getting up Harry went over to the shelf and took one of the may books down. It was a book that looked very old and worn. Harry had only ever read the smaller ones on the bottom shelf, so he opened the first page and read the title.

"Dark Arts of the Fourteenth century."

It seemed like a boring book but Harry read on regardless. It would kill some time until his father came home.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chp. 23 Give His Pain to Me 


	23. Give His Pain to Me

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 23 ( Give His Pain to Me)

Severus apparated straight to the place Lucius had given him and opened the door. Inside the house smelled dank, like it had been closed off for many years. It smelled of mold and mildew and other things Severus did not wish to think on. Seeing a light up ahead Severus opened the door and found Voldemort standing over a cauldron.

"My Lord," Severus said, kneeling before him, kissing the hem of his robes.

"Severusss, how good of you to join me. Lucius said you were without merit to me and I should do away with you, but I told him I needed you for my potions."

"Thank you my Lord. It pleases me to serve you in any manner that I can."

"Severusss, I need a potion to poison my enemies, but I do not wish them to die so quickly, no, I wish them to suffer."

"If it pleases you then I shall make it."

Severus set about brewing the potion, mixing herbs an ingredients as only his skilled hands could do, all the while being watched over by his most hated enemy.

Harry waited for more than an hour before he fire called Ron. He waited and just as he was about to step through the flames to see if Ron had heard him Ron poked his head through the fire.

"Sorry mate but mum and dad have gone out. I'm here with Fred and George."

"Can you come through for a few minutes?" Harry asked.

Harry stepped back and not only Ron but also Fred stepped through the fireplace and behind him George.

"They say I will get into too much trouble on my own," Ron groaned, staring at his brothers.

"Don't blame us. Mum told us to watch you, and to make sure you didn't get hurt. Now what kind of brothers would we be if we let you come alone?" George smirked.

Harry sat down and played a game of wizard's chess with Ron hoping it would take his mind off his father. He was staring at the chessboard hoping to find a way to keep Ron from taking his bishop when Fred picked up the book he had been reading. Ron took Harry's bishop and was about to take his knight when Fred sucked in a breath.

Curious as to what it was Harry looked over.

"Just what kind of stuff does that man let you read Harry?"

"What do you mean?" Harry said, forgetting the chess game and walking over.

"What do I mean?" Fred said. "Just look at this book they have spells to maim, to kill, and even one to burn someone alive."

Harry gulped at hearing what Fred was saying. When he had the book open his mind had been elsewhere and he hadn't really absorbed much of it if any.

"Look they even have a spell that makes you feel whatever someone else feels."

"Why in the world would you want someone else's pain?" Ron asked him.

"Who knows what fancied wizards back then. Maybe they got their jollies from it," Fred said, tossing the book down on the table. the page open to the empathy spell he had spoken of.

"Well, Harry we have to be getting home now. If mum comes back and finds us gone we will be grounded for a month."

Harry didn't want them to go, but he also didn't want them to get into any trouble because of him. Thanking them he watched as each one flooed back to The Burrow and flopped down on the couch. The book he had tossed down now seemed a bit more interesting and he picked it up. The spell seemed easy, even to Harry's seven year old mind. He wondered like Fred why wizards would want to feel someone else's pain. Yawning, Harry got up to get himself a cup of tea when the pain hit him.

Agonizing pain shot across his head. Harry moaned and in a flash Lucy was at his side.

"Is Master Harry in need of something?" the house elf asked leaning over the now groaning child.

Lucy saw that Harry's face was contorted in pain and she began to panic. "Master Harry is needing some help!" she screamed. "I will be getting you some help. Lucy is a good elf and Lucy will not be letting Master Harry hurt."

Harry shook himself, the pain blinding him, making him retch on the floor. "Lucy no!" he yelled. "I will be all right. Don't get anyone," he mumbled.

Lucy came back over handing Harry a wet cloth, But Master Harry is sick and he is needing someone to help him."

Just as Lucy went to get help Harry grabbed her leg. "I am fine Lucy, honest. I do not need any help and please do not tell anyone," Harry begged, still holding his head to keep the stabbing pains away. He wanted to move but his legs felt like someone was sticking them with hot pokers, his arms like lead.

Lucy stopped her movement towards the floo, but she wrung her hands. "Master Severus will be displeased with Lucy for this. He will punish Lucy by giving her clothes."

"No Lucy I won't tell him. Just help me to the couch and I will be fine."

Lucy helped Harry to the couch but before she could step away Harry grabbed her arm.

"Promise you won't say anything Lucy, promise me you won't speak of this to anyone."

Lucy's eyes filled with tears but she promised. Harry waited for her to go back to the kitchens to let out the groan. He knew what the pain was he had felt it for years now. Voldemort was mad, and he was punishing one of his servants, Harry only hoped it wasn't his father.

Severus finished the potion and pulled it off the fire to let it cool.

"Severussss, you do wonderful work. This is why I keep you around, but your loyalty has been questioned, and for that I must know the truth."

Severus waited as the Dark Lord probed his mind, searching for anything he could find to use against him, but he almost sighed when Voldemort spoke again.

"I can still see the hatred for the muggles in your mind, and yet you displease me. I have asked you time and time again to get me into Hogwarts and you cannot seem to do this one thing for me. For that you must be punished. Crucio!" Voldemort yelled, watching with glee as Severus writhed in pain. He grew tired after only a few minutes when Severus would not yell out and released him.

"Do not anger me again my little snake. There shall be a meeting this weekend. We shall rid the town of Enfield of the muggles who reside there. Do not be late to my call again."

Severus kissed the hems of Voldemort's robes. "I shall not dishonor you again My Lord."

The front door opened and Severus stumbled in. His body ached, his head throbbed and all he could think of was checking on Harry. He stumbled past the kitchen and as he was turning to go down the hall to Harry's room he spotted the boy on the couch, curled in a ball. Severus leaned down to cover him, the pain making him dizzy for a moment.

Harry looked cold, so cold in fact that Severus called Lucy to light a fire, his own hands to unsteady to do it. Lucy came and lit the fire and then stared down at Harry and then to Severus.

"Is sir in need of the potion?" she asked.

"Yes Lucy, if you would go and get it I will be in my bedroom in just a moment."

Severus looking down at Harry whom he thought sleeping and saw him tremble. Taking the covers off the back of the couch he covered him up and felt his hands to see if they felt cold. Harry's hand felt warm to the touch and with the fire roaring Severus stumbled to his feet and to his room. He didn't have the strength to get undressed and flopped down on the bed.

He laid there willing the pain in his head to go away when he heard the door to his room creak open. Lucy walked over to the bed and placed the vial next to him and started to walk out.

"Lucy." Severus called. "Did everything go well here tonight? Were there any problems?"

Lucy gulped down wringing her hands again. "No Master Severus, everything was just wonderful here, Lucy was making sure of it."

Severus groaned and laid back down. is whole body hurt, every inch, a lasting remnant of the Crutius curse. Reaching over to his nightstand he grabbed the vial and downed it. It would not heal him completely, but it would help him enough to where he could fall asleep and that is what he did.

Harry awoke and found himself on the couch covered up with a blanket but didn't remember grabbing it when he went to sleep. Knowing the only other explanation was that his father was home Harry tiptoed down the hall to his room and pushed the door open very quietly.

Harry didn't want to disturb him but he had to make sure his father was all right. When he finally got to the edge of the bed he looked at the man he called Dad tangled up in the covers, his face scrunched up as if in pain. Harry knew then that his father had been the one to suffer from Voldemort's hand.

Harry wanted to help him but he didn't know enough about potions to brew him one. Harry was scared. If his father died who would take care of him? Harry knew the answer to his problems. As quietly as he could he reached into his father's robes and pulled out his wand. Harry knew he would have to return it before he woke up or suffer the questions Severus was sure to ask.

Making his way back to the sitting room Harry pulled open he book. He flipped through the pages until he found the one Fred had been looking at. The Empathy spell did not seem to difficult Harry thought. With a flick of his father's wand Harry spoke the words, Tribuo suus poena volo.

Harry waited thinking the spell did not work until he saw the blue glow circle him, and then he felt the nagging headache return. Clutching his head Harry sat down to keep from falling. He was dizzy now, but not to the point of being sick like before. His arms and legs hurt but the pain was like when he chased Ron around the Quidditch pitch. Knowing he needed to return his father's wand, Harry snuck back down the hall and into his room.

His father seemed to be resting peacefully now. No longer did clinch the sheets in his hand and his brow was no longer scrunched up. Now he was curled up with his hands tucked under the pillow, snoring lightly. Harry didn't think he could reach his pocket without waking him so he laid the wand on the nightstand, and went to crawl into his own bed.

He didn't bother to get into his nightclothes, he just wanted to sleep. Harry didn't care about anything other than his plan had worked and now his father would be safe. Closing his eyes he prayed his head would stop hurting and drifted off into a fitful sleep.

Give his pain to me- Tribuo suus poena volo

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 24 (Acting the Part) 


	24. Acting the Part

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 24 (Acting the Part)

When Severus awoke the next morning he was relieved to find that all remnants of the curse were gone. He almost felt as if he had never been cursed at all. Thinking his was very fortunate he climbed from the bed and noticed he had not even taken his robes off from the night before. It was then Severus saw his wand sitting on the nightstand. He thought it peculiar that he would lay it there, but knew he was not in very good shape when he came home he shrugged it off and went to take a nice long bath.

Stepping from his room Severus saw Lucy making breakfast and sat down to enjoy a cup of coffee.

"Will sir be eating this morning?" Lucy questioned, knowing her master did not usually eat after coming home from a meeting.

"I think I would enjoy pancakes this morning Lucy, and a side of bacon if you can manage it."

Lucy could not explain her master's appetite but the thought of pleasing him, made her absolutely giddy and she went about making breakfast while he sat and sipped his coffee and read the newspaper. Soon there was a stack of pancakes on the table almost a foot high, and what seemed to Severus like a pound of bacon next to it.

"Lucy, there is no way I can eat all this unless I grow an extra head. I believe Harry is going to have to help me," Severus said, getting up from his chair to wake Harry.

Severus opened the door and walked over to the bed. He could see Harry was bundled up in the sheets in a ball, his head covered up under his pillow. Grabbing the sheet he yanked the covers away.

"Rise and shine there are pancakes to be eaten, and a full day of no classes for me to teach."

Harry groaned and tried to roll over and go back to sleep. His head was still pounding and he didn't relish the idea of eating anything.

"Come Harry, enough of this foolishness it is well past breakfast time and Lucy has made enough to feed an army of giants.

Harry opened his eyes mere slits and stared at his father. He really wanted to hide under the covers all day, but the look of his father staring back at him with a rare smile had him sitting up in the bed.

"Hurry and get dressed and come to the table. I expect you there in five minutes."

Harry waited till his father closed the door to groan. His whole body felt terrible, like so many other times when he knew Voldemort was mad. He had never spoken about his dreams with his father. As far as Harry knew no one else knew about it. Grabbing his jumper off the back of the chair he pulled it over his head and finished getting dressed. He didn't know if he could eat but he would try.

"Harry, you finally made it I see. Come and sit down and look at the stack of pancakes Lucy has made for us."

Harry took his seat and the scent of the pancakes hit him sending his stomach into violent churning. Grabbing his glass of pumpkin juice Harry tried to stave off the urge to retch.

Severus heaped Harry's plate full of food and then settled in to eat his own.

"Come on Harry. The other day I saw you eat five pancakes. You are a growing boy, and you need to eat."

Harry picked up his fork and forced down a bite, chasing it with the pumpkin juice which seemed to calm his stomach. Harry knew from previous dreams that the feeling would pass, but for now he could not look at the food, much less eat it.

"I'm not hungry Dad, can I skip breakfast?"

"Are you feeling well?" Severus asked, immediately wondering why.

"I feel fine, just not really hungry. Maybe you could save me some for later."

"Finish your juice if nothing else, but you will eat your lunch I presume, considering today is our picnic by the lake."

Harry smiled, Yes, I can't wait."

Harry excused himself to go shower in hopes that the hot water would ease some of the pain in his arms and legs, and sure enough when he stepped from the shower an hour later he was clean and his body didn't ache as much. His head still hurt some, but it was nothing compared to that morning. 'A small price to pay to keep from being sent to an orphanage,' Harry thought.

Harry spent the day chasing Severus around the lake, pushing him in once only to be scolded and then pushed in himself. They sat down on the blanket and Severus told him again about how much he reminded Severus of Lily, of her smile, her laugh. Harry loved hearing stories about his mother, and sat curled up in Severus' lap as he told them. These were the times that Harry loved the most, when he and his father could be just father and son.

Often Harry would mistake his father's wrath at school. Everyone at Hogwarts knew he was Harry Potter, but they didn't know he was not simply there at Dumbledore's invite for the day, but he was there actually to see his father at mealtimes. Severus pretended to loathe Harry there, playing the part that he must play in order for them both to survive.

It was on that Thursday that Harry once again found himself at Hogwarts. The Headmaster had invited him to have lunch with his father and Harry had jumped at the chance, but walking towards the headmaster's office Harry ran right into a few Slytherins. Harry looked everywhere to see of anyone was around to help, but no one was coming and the stares of the Slytherins were intense.

"Harry Potter, how nice of you to drop by," one of them smirked. "My father has spoken about you. How you tried to kill the Dark Lord. He is amazed that a piece of muggle filth like you could do it. I personally think he would be very happy if I were to bring you to him."

Harry cringed, being only seven he was half the size of the Slytherin holding him and he had no means of escape. Closing his eyes he felt the sharp pain as the Slytherin boy delivered a fist to his stomach. Harry awaited the next blow but it never came, and he ventured to open his eyes.

"My my boys, what have we here?" Severus said, glaring at Harry. "Boys I have told you not to play with your enemies but to go for the kill have I not?" he said, staring at the boys around him. All the boys nodded in affirmation. "I have also told you about being discreet. Now how would it look for you to have him in your possession should Dumbledore come walking around the corner?"

"He deserves no sympathy. He is a half breed and should suffer the Dark Lord's wrath for what he has done!" one of the boys spat.

"I agree Mr. Smittens, but we shall have our chance soon. Dumbledore will be looking for him, but we shall bid our time, and very soon we shall avenge the Dark Lord."

The boys let go of Harry and took off in the direction of the Great Hall. Once they were gone Severus picked Harry up and walked into an empty classroom, sitting him on one of the empty desks.

"Are you all right Harry? Did they hurt you?"

Harry shook his head and turned away from Severus.

"Harry look at me. You know I must act the part when you are here, we have spoken about it many times. Tell me did they hurt you?"

Harry turned back around and Severus saw the tears glistening in the corners of his eyes. Harry showed him the bruise trying to form on his stomach, and Severus sent one of the house elves to retrieve a salve for it. Once the house elf returned Severus spread it on Harry's bruise until all traces of it were gone, and then he gently placed his arms around Harry.

"I am truly sorry Harry. To give away our secret means certain death for both of us. You understand that don't you?" Harry nodded his head yes, but Severus did not miss the hurt in his eyes. "Perhaps it is best if you don't come for lunch for a while."

"No Dad!" I like eating lunch with you" Harry yelled, wrapping his arms around Severus' neck.

Severus returned the hug, and picked Harry up placing him back on his feet. "Come, let us go to lunch before the headmaster comes looking for us."

Harry and Severus went through the back way to the headmaster's room and soon were knocking on his door. When they entered Dumbledore was sitting behind his desk.

"Severus, Harry I was wondering what was keeping you, no problems I presume?"

"None Headmaster, we were just having a little talk."

"Good to hear, Severus I would like to have a talk with you about this coming weekend after lunch if I may."

Severus nodded his head, and the three of them enjoyed a nice lunch of roast chicken and potatoes. Harry's stomach was feeling much better now and soon his plate was empty.

"Harry, I have a new collection of those muggle comic books you enjoy so much upstairs in my study. You are more than welcome to go and look at them if you wish."

Harry's eyes brightened at the chance to go and look at the books, but he also knew when he was being distracted so the adults could talk. Harry got up from his seat and walked the spiral staircase up to the study, but after only a few minutes he found himself coming back down.

"If I don't go then he will grow more suspicious Albus," he heard his father say.

"Severus, I only worry for your well being. Voldemort has been brutal as of late. How long can you go on spying before he gives you an ultimatum?"

"I will do what I have to do to keep Harry safe Albus you know this. Warn the people of Enfield, tell them the Dark Lord will be coming this weekend, but Albus he did not tell me when."

"I understand Severus but do try to be careful. I have grown quite fond of you and I would hate to see anything happen to you. What would become of Harry?"

"Harry is why I do this Albus. I do not know where he would go, but he will be safe as long as I can manage it."

Harry didn't want to hear anymore and made sure he made lots of noise coming back down the stairs.

"Harry," Severus said, noticing the boy standing at the bottom of the stairs. "Are you ready to go home now?"

Harry said he was and Severus told him goodbye and that he would be home soon. Harry stepped into the floo in the Headmaster's office and stepped back out in his own home. He was glad he had done the spell because now his father would be safe, now he would not be sent away. Smiling to himself Harry went to find Lucy to see what they were having for lunch.

A/N: See you next Thursday for

Chapter 25 ( A Quick Departure) 


	25. A Quick Departure

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 25 (A Quick Departure)

The next day went by in much of a blur. Severus had placed the charms on Harry and then firecalled Lucius, hoping to pry some information out of him.

Harry and Draco played in his room while Severus stroked Lucius' ego, and placated him with wine, praying he would let just the tiniest of details slip.

"Lucius, surely you know you are the Dark Lord's most trusted ally. You must know where we will attack this weekend," Severus crooned, as he poured the blond man another drink.

"Why are you so interested in where Severus. You have never cared before, why should you now?"

Severus knew he must answer this question without flinching. "I must make arrangements for Harry if we are to be out all night."

"Can't your house elf watch him?"

"My house elf is a poor excuse for protection against the mind of my seven year old son. I will come home to the house in shambles."

Lucius downed the last of his wine and stood as if to leave.

"I would make preparations to have someone watch him then for I do think we shall be gone late into the evening. Now I must go, Draco has an early day tomorrow. I am teaching him a few new spells."

"So early?" Severus questioned.

"Early Severus? Was it not you who entered Hogwarts knowing half the dark arts spells yourself?"

Severus conceded, he knew when to stop pushing the issue. Draco would have to be saved another time, for now he had to figure out how to save himself from the Dark Lord.

As Harry slept that night Severus stood by the door. He had been in his bed when he felt a sudden need to check on his son, and that had led him to where he was standing now. Harry looked so small, so helpless. How could this boy be the savior of the wizarding world? How could he hope to defeat the Dark Lord when he had yet to learn even the simplest of spells? Perhaps, he thought Lucius is not so insane as to teach Draco now.

Harry appetite was back in full force the next morning and he finished his plate of food, and then when Severus was not looking Harry snitched the bacon from his plate as well.

Severus reached for his bacon as he put the paper down and found he only came back with a hand full of grease.

"It seems someone was hungrier than they thought," he said ruffling Harry's already messy hair.

Harry grinned back and set off to get dressed. He and Severus had planned on having lunch again today at Hogwarts, but as Harry came out of the room he saw his father standing by the door, his arm the color of fire, his eyes wincing in pain.

"Firecall Remus, Harry and have him come to sit with you."

Harry wanted to hug his father good-bye but Severus took off in a run towards the apparition point. Harry sat for over an hour on the couch waiting to see if this was just one of those times his father would return swiftly, but it was not the case.

Standing he went to the fireplace and threw in a handful of floo powder and a few minutes later Remus stepped out.

"Well, Harry so nice to see you again."

"Hello Uncle Remus. Do you know when he will be back?"

"Harry I am afraid we are all in the dark on this one. Severus was not able to procure any information about where the attack would take place, but he does have an amulet to alert us once he arrives."

Harry felt a bit better knowing his father had something to help him, and let Remus talk him into a game of cards, a muggle game that Remus enjoyed.

Hours ticked by in the small house on the outskirts of town, and Severus wiped the sweat from his brow as he leaned over the cauldron pouring in the lacewings. Voldemort wanted a potion to make its victim think their attack came not from the Death Eaters but from their own loved ones. 'A deserving blow to their egos before death,' Voldemort had said.

By the time the potion was finished it was late in the evening, and Severus was all but exhausted. Standing up straight and popping the kinks from his back he went to find the Dark Lord, and deliver his potion.

"Ahhh Severuss, is my potion ready?"

Severus kneeled, holding the potion upwards to him. "It is ready my Lord."

"Arise my followers and let us go now into the streets of Enfield and rid it of the muggle filth that dwells within. Let no muggle go unpunished, let no house be unsearched. Destroy all who stand in your path."

There were shouts from the Death Eaters, and then the search began. House after house the people were dragged out. All those who struggled were killed outright, and those who chose to hide were made examples of. Men were beaten to death in front of their families, children were taken from their mother's arms, and the women were used and then cast away dead as if they were nothing.

Severus watched all this, standing at the Dark Lord's side. His place was to make potions not to kill, and he relished that fact. He felt very relieved to see some of the Death Eaters coming back towards them, hoping the night was over, but his hopes were soon dashed.

Remus beat Harry three times in the muggle card game before Harry asked if they could stop. He went and took a bath, and put on his pajamas and returned to the living room.

"Can I sit out here with you Uncle Remus, just for a little while?"

Remus had not the heart to say no, and patted the couch beside him.

"How about if I read to you for a while?"

Harry nodded his head yes, and scooted over to Remus, laying his head on his shoulder as Remus began the story. Harry had no idea what was about to happen in Enfield.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 26 (Massacre in Enfield) 


	26. Massacre in Enfield

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 26 (Massacre in Enfield)

Severus watched as Lucius and the others returned, looks of satisfaction on their faces, blood on their hands.

"Cleanse your hands before you kneel before me!" Voldemort screamed.

Instantly there were cleaning charms being muttered all around.

"Now my loyal servants I have ..." but Voldemort did not finish his statement, for running towards him was a portly woman.

The woman was dressed in what appeared to be the garb of a warrior, but all too soon she was stunned and brought before Voldemort in the streets.

"What have we here, someone thinking they can stop me? A savior perhaps?"

The snorts and jeers were heard throughout the ranks of the Death Eaters and Lucius stepped forward.

"My Lord let me kill this muggle for you, let me have that pleasure."

Voldemort smiled at Lucius and laid his bony hand upon his shoulder.

"Lucius, my ever loyal servant. You were always ready to do my bidding, but I have another in mind for this task. Severus step forward," Voldemort said.

Severus felt his stomach twist into a knot, but he masked it behind a face of cold indifference. Bowing before the Dark Lord he stood, facing him.

"Often you have missed out on the fun of the hunt Severus, but I shall not deprive you of killing this muggle for she is one who deserves to die."

Severus watched as the woman was woken from the stunner and then he watched her futile attempts to break free.

"Kneel before the Dark Lord!" he roared and instantly the woman lunged for him. Severus sent a curse flying towards the girl, knocking her back a few feet and then she was dragged back by her arms to face him again. Severus leaned over and picked up the supposed weapon. When he saw it was nothing more than a plastic sword he sneered.

"Were you going to kill me with your sword?"

The woman struggled to break free, but failed. "I may not be some witch or whatever you are but I read the comics, the villains in comics scare me more than you."

Severus leaned towards the Dark Lord and whispered in his ear. "My Lord, this one is suffering from delusions, a slow witted muggle that is hardly worth your time."

"Any muggle death is worth watching Severus but perhaps you are right. My followers what shall become of this muggle who chooses to taint the world?"

"Let us curse her to starve to death!" Crabbe yelled out.

"That is inane! It will take weeks for someone her size to die from starvation," Severus explained.

Many more ideas were shouted while the woman cowered before them, but it was the sickening smile that came across Voldemort's face that made Severus cringe inwardly.

"Silence!" he yelled. "Severus, my little potion master. We shall try out your new creation on this muggle, a testament of your loyalty to me. I wish her to suffer Severus or I shall not be pleased and you shall be the bearer of my anger."

Severus gulped back the bile in his throat and grabbed the fat meaty neck of the woman. She would not open her mouth willingly so Severus punched her in the face. That was all it took for her mouth to open and then the potion was poured down her throat.

Severus knew he would have to put on a show, a show of defiling this woman before he would be allowed to kill her. For just a second Severus prayed for forgiveness for himself and then he sent the hex towards her.

The screams brought rounds of applause as the woman's legs were broken. Severus wished to kill her, but again an again he sent the curses and hexes flying towards her. The woman's screams filled the air, begging, pleading for help that was not coming.

Willow! why are you doing this?" she screamed, until Severus threw the curse at her. The woman retched until blood poured from her nose and mouth, all the while begging Krystal to save her, but Krystal was not coming.

"Listen to her Severus, listen to the muggle scream for help," Voldemort jeered. "She begs for forgiveness for her past sins, and tonight she will have it in the form of death."

Severus could not take her screams anymore and with one last hex he sent the muggle woman to her death.

All was silent now in the streets of Enfield and that is when Voldemort turned back to Severus.

"I am pleased with you tonight Severus, but you ended our fun prematurely for that you must be punished, Crucio!"

Voldemort would be hexing Severus for many more minutes, but the woman he ordered to be left in the sewers, where filth like her belonged.

Severus felt the pain right away and fell to his knees in front of the Dark Lord, but back at home it was Harry who felt the pain the worst.

Harry was just about to drift off to sleep when the pain of the curse hit him. Instantly his eyes widened and he bit down on his lip to keep from screaming out in front of Remus.

Remus' senses picked up the scent of blood and looked down at Harry. He didn't see any blood but he sensed it. "Harry?" he questioned.

Harry lifted up just a bit and Remus saw the bloody lip. "When did you do this?"

Harry fought back the pain and replied, "I was thinking and bit down on my lip too hard."

Remus thought Harry far too sleepy and stood up. "I think you are tired. Why don't you go to bed. I will wake you the moment your father gets home."

Harry stood and walked slowly to his room but before he could climb into the bed he fell beside it and lost the contents of his stomach. Harry tried one last time to stand but he collapsed on the floor again, this time falling into a fevered unconsciousness.

Remus paced the floor for a while and then sat back down when Lucy brought him a cup of coffee. He sipped at it, but his growing worry for Severus had him going to check on Harry. He noticed earlier that Harry was distant.

As soon as Remus opened the door he knew something was wrong. Looking to the bed he didn't see Harry, and it was when he walked towards it that he spotted the boy on the floor.

"Harry!" Remus yelled to him, thinking the boy had fallen and hurt himself.

Harry picked up his head, "Remus, I don't feel good," he whimpered.

Remus could feel the heat radiating off Harry, but when he went to lift him off the floor Harry yelled out in pain. Remus almost dropped Harry, but he carefully and quickly placed Harry on the bed and went to get a cool cloth for his head. Coming back into the room Remus flicked his wand to clean the mess from the floor and pulled up a chair to sit with Harry. The child was now shivering; Remus thought from the fever but it was the after effects of the Cruciatus.

Severus laid beneath Voldemort's feet waiting for the end of the curse and soon Voldemort released it from him.

"Severus, think about this the next time you wish to defy me and end my entertainment."

"Yes My Lord," Severus said, still kneeling.

The sound of several people apparating in caused the end of the conversation as the Aurors had arrived. Severus went to stand, knowing he would be in pain, but as he stood up straight he realized that in fact he felt all right. Thinking he was lucky Severus apparated away as he saw Alabastor Moody headed his way.

"Remus," Severus called, as he came through the door. He didn't see the werewolf anywhere and swore outloud.

Severus' heart started beating faster hoping nothing had happened and called for Lucy. The house elf popped into the kitchen, wringing her bandaged hands. Severus would have asked her why she had punished herself but his mind was on other matters.

"Where is Remus?"

"Master Remus is with Master Harry sir."

Lucy seemed to have more to say but she didn't and Severus was in no mood to question her. Severus felt an old grudge surfacing, one that told him he should not have left Harry with Remus, but when he opened Harry's door and saw Remus asleep, his hand on Harry's head he soon realized his error.

Severus walked quietly over and shook Remus, bringing the man from his sleep instantly. He motioned for Remus to follow him out into the sitting room.

"Severus, did things go well tonight?" Remus inquired.

Severus launched into the story about how they massacred the muggles of Enfield, but of how he thought that he was back in the Dark Lord's good graces.

"Does Sir need Lucy to get him the potion?"

Severus noticed the house elf who had popped in while they had been speaking. "No Lucy, I am actually feeling much better now. The Dark Lord must be weakening for I never recover this quickly after a few of his curses."

Remus shook his head, placing it in his hands. "Severus in all the excitement I forgot to tell you, Harry was feeling unwell earlier. I put him in bed and he fell asleep right away, but he did look rather pale."

At the news that Harry was ill Severus rushed into the room. Harry was still fast asleep, but it seemed to be a troubled sleep. The sheets were drenched in sweat and tangled underneath him. Harry's left arm held his stuffed dragon, but his face was what brought Severus to his side. The normal rosy cheeks were now ashen, and Severus could see the dried tear tracks on his face.

"He was fine earlier," Severus said aloud to himself.

Severus gently pushed back the covers and gathered Harry in his arms. Harry whimpered, but then fell silent again. Severus noticed his breathing seemed troubled, and felt his head.

"Do you need me to stay Severus?" Remus asked.

"We will be fine Remus, thank you but you may go home," Severus said, taking his wand out and placing a freshening charm on Harry's clothes. When Remus did not make a move towards the floo Severus turned around.

"You may transfigure the couch into a bed and stay if you prefer."

Remus gladly accepted his offer, feeling much better knowing he could be there to help with Harry, for he was the closest thing Remus had to a family.

Severus continued down the hall till he got to his room, and pushed open the door with his foot. He had Lucy turn down the covers and then laid Harry down on the bed. Harry once laid down moaned and then curled into a ball, grabbing at the sheets with his hand. Severus finished getting dressed in his night clothes and laid down beside Harry, gathering him in his arms he rocked the child. Harry for his part knew his father was home, knew he was safe, but the effects of the curses filled every fiber of his being with pain.

Harry finally drifted off into a troubled sleep, one filled with men in masks laughing over the people they had killed.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 27 (Bad Dreams) 


	27. Bad Dreams

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 27

The next morning Severus noticed Harry's face seemed to be back to its normal color almost, but he did not waken the boy as he maneuvered out of the bed and went to shower. It was in the shower that Severus had time to think, and that was not something he ever relished doing.

It was when times were quiet when he had time to reflect back on things he would rather forget. As Severus let the hot water pound against his back he thought back to the screams of the muggles, and how he had also killed. He was not happy about having to do it, but the alternative would have been a very slow and painful death at the hands of the Dark Lord.

Severus turned the shower off and stepped out. He always felt shaky after being cursed by the Dark Lord. Perhaps, he thought the Dark Lord had missed, perhaps his strength was waning, but Severus did not think so. Wrapping the towel around him Severus went into the room to get dressed and peered down at the bed where Harry had been sleeping.

Harry wasn't there any longer and Severus hoped he had not woken the boy, but the headache that was forming in his temples made him sit on the bed. It was not a regular headache born from a night of being cursed but one of trying to solve something that was still an enigma to him. He felt the need to check on Harry, but his son's hushed voice talking to Remus behind the door satisfied Severus that Harry would be all right for a few more minutes.

Severus put on his clothes and then sat down on the edge of the bed, rubbing his temples as he did. He knew he would have to inform Dumbledore about his suspicions. Severus did not for one minute think that Voldemort had lost his touch, but then again he couldn't explain why he felt fine after being cursed by him. Shaking his head he got up and opened the door to go and check on Harry.

"Severus, so good to see you up and about. How are you feeling?" Remus asked.

Severus sent the man a look that clearly stated he was in no mood to talk about it in front of Harry and Remus got the point right away.

"How about a bit of breakfast then?"

Severus stared at Remus unsure of why he was still there and voiced his opinion before he thought about it.

"Why it is you are still here Lupin? Unless of course you enjoy my company, and I highly doubt that? Don't you have to go away to the shack this weekend?"

Remus' eyes said what he couldn't. "I was just making sure Harry was fine before I left, nothing more." he said making his way to towards the door.

Severus looked over to Harry who was staring at him, a look of confusion and a bit of sadness on his face.

"Harry how are you this morning, feeling better I assume?"

Harry nodded his head that he was and carefully placed his still shaking hands behind his back. He didn't want his father to see his hands.

"Harry come and eat your breakfast before it gets cold. Lupin I am sure I will be seeing you next week sometime," Severus said, Remus understanding this took it as his cue to leave.

Remus told Harry good-bye and then closed the door quietly behind him. Harry waited till he heard the familiar sound of Remus apparating away before getting up from the floor and walking over to the table to sit down. He reached for a plate and saw his hands shaking slightly and hoped his father hadn't. He quickly placed a couple of eggs and a piece of bacon on his plate and started to eat, but the taste of the food made the nausea come rushing back.

Severus saw Harry's hands shaking, but thought maybe he had frightened the boy with is harsh words earlier. Making a mental note to try and be more patient Severus picked up the Daily Prophet to read it, but the headlines of the muggle slayings on the front page made him drop it as if it were a snake. He didn't want to think about what he had done last night, the images still haunted him.

Harry was forcing himself to eat the eggs but after the third bite his stomach started churning. Hoping he could stave off the inevitable he grabbed his glass of milk, but his hands were shaking so badly that he dropped the glass, sending milk all over the table and Severus.

"Harry!" Severus yelled, jumping up from the table and pulling his wand out to clean up the mess.

Harry jumped at the sound of his father's voice, backing up in his chair, as Lucy popped into the room with a fresh glass of milk for Harry. Harry went to stand, but his father halted his steps.

"You have not eaten a thing. Get back here and eat something or you will become sick again. I don't know what you were suffering from last night, but I do not wish a relapse."

Harry sat back down, trying to fight off the tears, but one fell onto the table. Harry wiped it quickly from his face, and picked up the milk again, his hand shaking slightly. He felt sick to his stomach, his muscles ached still even after the potion Remus had given him before his father had gotten home. He took a sip from the milk and knew instantly that it had been a mistake, his stomach churned and revolted against him, and before he could get up and run for the bathroom the milk came back up.

Severus cringed, and then cleaned the mess up. "Harry, go back to bed. I will be in with a calming draught for your stomach in a few moments."

Harry shuffled off to his room, and climbed back into the bed, kicking off his slippers as he did. He wanted to tell his father what he had done, but then he would have been hurt and then Harry would have to go live in an orphanage. Harry could not wrap his seven year old mind around the complexity of what he had done, all he knew was his father was safe.

Severus walked into the room just as Harry made it back to the door.

"Where do you think you are going?"

"Umm ... I feel a lot better really," Harry stammered out.

"Regardless of how you think you feel, you just threw up all over my breakfast, that I would say is a sure sign that you are not feeling as well as you would have me believe."

Harry looked as if he were going to protest, but halted when Severus pointed to the bed. Once Harry was in it again Severus pulled up the covers and felt his head.

"You have a slight fever no doubt from just now emptying your stomach. I would love to sit at home today but I have to go and speak to Dumbledore. Should you require anything ask Lucy, and if anything goes wrong firecall me at the Headmaster's office."

Harry waited till his father closed the door and then buried his face in the pillow and cried. He wasn't crying because Severus was leaving, he was crying from the continuous ache that wouldn't seem to go away. Not long after Harry was exhausted, and into an exhausted sleep he fell.

Severus spent three hours talking to Dumbledore and telling him of all the things that had happened. When he had gotten to the part of how he had to kill the muggle he wept.

Severus told Dumbledore how he had miraculously recovered from the Dark Lord's curse only moments after he had let up on it. Dumbledore had no explanation for it either. Both pondered if he was in fact losing strength but neither could be certain as of yet. Severus stood up and turned to Albus.

"I am tired Albus, and Harry was not feeling well earlier. I am going home to check on him and then fall into my bed and try to sleep for three days."

The sound of Severus apparating outside sent Lucy to the door.

"Master Severus sir, Master Harry was calling for you earlier but when I went in to check on him he was asleep."

Severus walked past the house elf and went straight to Harry's room. When he got to the bed, he glanced down at Harry who was curled into a ball, his face buried in the pillow. Severus wondered how all thoughts of everything else could fly out the window as soon as he laid eyes on him. When his whole world was crumbling around him, the one thing that kept him going was the little boy asleep in the bed. Placing a kiss upon his brow Severus turned and walked out, leaving the door ajar in case Harry awoke again.

Harry tossed and turned, the images of the people dying, screaming, as they ran only to fall dead seconds later. He saw their bloody faces, eyes clawed out by their own hands in their delusions. He wanted to run away, to turn away and not see them anymore and then the most horrifying image of all came into view.

Harry had always been frightened of the man with red eyes. Something told him that this man wanted to hurt him, and Harry shivered underneath his blankets. Soon the image became more real with various men in dark robes sending sparks from their wands, and then the muggles falling down, some burned, some grotesquely mangled. It was then that Harry saw his father kneeling before the man with red eyes. He called out to him to run away not realizing that it was all apart of his dream.

Harry watched as his father writhed in pain from the curse, screaming at the end, but the man did not stop. Over and over he cast the spell until his father made no sound at all, biting his tongue until he tasted blood. This is when Harry awoke from his dream, panting, head soaked in sweat, and muscles aching. He slipped his feet over the side of the bed, and tiptoed quietly out of the room.

When Harry got to his father's room he was grateful that the door had been left open enough for him to slip through. He only made it halfway across the room before he stopped. Harry realized that if he woke his father up and told him he had a bad dream that his father would possibly send him back to his room, tuck him in again, and then leave him there alone. Harry didn't want to be alone right now he was scared. Venturing closer to the bed, Harry could see his father hadn't even heard him come in. He wanted to crawl into the bed and go back to sleep, but his father's earlier mood made him rethink that idea. Harry didn't want to make him angry, but his childlike mind could not fathom going back to his room at this point. Harry decided he would just lay down on the floor. The covers from the bed hung down about six inches past the floor, and Harry curled up inside them as best he could.

When morning came Severus did not notice. It was well past ten when Severus rolled over and decided he had spent enough time in bed. He knew that Harry had been ill the day before and he wanted to check on him. As he laid in the bed he listened for Harry's laugh or for Lucy in the kitchen, but all he heard was silence. Slipping his feet over the bed, Severus went to stand and that is when he noticed there was something underneath his feet. Grabbing his wand from underneath his pillow, Severus aimed it at the floor and pulled the covers onto the bed. When he did Harry started to shiver even more.

"Harry?" Severus called softly. When he got no reply back he knelt down next to the boy and placed his hand on his forehead, and found it was not hot with fever but cold to the touch.

"Harry!" Severus yelled, bringing Lucy running into the room to see what her Master wished.

Severus picked up Harry and he opened his eyes.

"Dad?" he said, his voice sounding groggy. "I'm cold Dad."

Severus forgot all about Lucy standing in the doorway and pulled back his covers on the bed. After laying Harry down he pulled the covers up to his chin and that was when Harry started to shiver. Lucy came into the room with an extra blanket and Severus placed a warming charm on it and wrapped it around Harry, tucking it in underneath him.

"Why in Merlin's name were you asleep on my floor?" he asked, thinking Harry was still half asleep, and not really expecting an answer.

"Had a bad dream, didn't want to wake you up," Harry mumbled before rolling into a ball, tugging the covers around him.

Severus shook his head. Had he been that unapproachable yesterday? He had planned on brewing a potion all day but now that would have to wait. He sat back down on the end of the bed until he was sure Harry was once again asleep, and then left to get a bite of lunch. He was sure that Harry was not sick, but after spending the night on the cold floor there was no telling what kind of shape he would be in once he woke up. After eating a sandwich , Severus returned to his room. Harry seemed to have the right idea, and after all his plans had been to sleep all day. Severus kicked his own slippers off and laid down on the bed next to Harry. Soon both were asleep, neither of them having any dreams.

A/N: See you next Thurs. with Chp. 28 (One Accident After Another) 


	28. One Accident After Another

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 28

Severus awoke very late. He opened his eyes expecting to see the sun, but instead he was met with total darkness. Turning his head slightly he read the numbers on the grandfather clock. It was nearly four in the morning, and Severus couldn't believe he had slept so long. Rolling over he placed a hand on Harry's head, and saw that the boy was neither hot or cold. Relieved Severus gently eased out of the bed, and went into the kitchens.

Severus stretched, and felt better than he had in months. This must be what it felt like to actually get a good nights sleep, however you procured it. Severus walked into the kitchen and put on a kettle for some tea. He was sure to be quiet for he didn't want Lucy to waken and interrupt the solitude. Once his tea was ready he sat there sipping it and staring out the window. Something about the darkness of night had always scared him as a child, but now he felt a sense of calm.

Severus knew he had classes to teach today, but perhaps he would get Lucy to prepare Harry's favorite dish for dinner. Maybe that would bring back Harry's appetite. His cup now empty, Severus stood up and went into the bathroom to take a long bath. He turned on the water as hot as he dared and added the cinnamon scent into his bath. He then sank deep beneath the water of the tub and laid his head against the back of it. The water felt wonderful, and Severus did not wish to ever get out. On the other side of the door, Harry snuggled deeper into the covers, and relaxed.

Harry did not waken when it was time for breakfast, nor when his father kissed him atop the head before he left for work. Harry did not wake up till he heard the clattering of the bowls as Lucy made lunch.

Opening his eyes he realized that all the pain from the day before was now all but gone, and that he felt hungry enough to eat a bear. Quickly he clambered out of the bed, and went to wash up, and get dressed, and within minutes had flopped himself down at the table as Lucy brought out the chicken soup and crisps.

"Master Severus said for Lucy to make you soup for lunch so Lucy is doing what she is told." the house elf explained, as Harry looked at the soup as if wanting something else.

Sighing, he picked up his spoon and realized he did in fact enjoy the soup, and crumbled all of his crisps into it and stirred it up. The soup felt good going down, and after no hint of it coming back up, Harry tucked in.

Severus sat at the table with the other teachers, occasionally glaring at one of the Hufflepuffs as he ate. He was so preoccupied with glaring at them he forgot to cool the soup before placing the spoon in his mouth. Severus dropped it immediately, the soup scorching is tongue, but the feeling disappeared as fast as it had come, and he went about eating, only after applying the cooling charm. At home however, Harry's own spoon fell into his bowl with a clatter.

"How could the last bite burn my tongue?" he thought. Not really caring Harry pushed himself back from the table and went to color in the book Severus had bought him. He colored the picture of the dragon first, making the scales green and the wings bright red. Harry even drew flames coming from the dragon's mouth as the picture didn't have any and then he went to color another.

Severus sat watching the first years potion class, with a relentless glare. The students were Gryfinndors and of course easily distracted. It didn't help matters that the Weasley twins were in the class. Severus knew that one if not both of them would try something before the end of class, for it never failed. They seemed almost immune to his looks of death, well, either immune or too dense to care.

Severus was peering into Fred Weasley's cauldron when he began to rant.

"The potion was supposed to be a bright yellow Mr. Weasley, but I see your lack of reading skills has produced a green sludge instead."

Severus was about to clear the substance away when it started to bubble and froth, and in one loud pop the contents of the cauldron grew into a giant bubble, lifting from the cauldron itself. Severus wasted no time in placing a shielding charm around the room, but he was not quick enough to place one on himself before the bubble burst.

Severus fell backward from the blast, knocking over two rows of desks before he came to a halt underneath one of them. He went to get up, but placing weight on his arm, made him cry out in sudden pain. Severus rolled his eyes, just what he needed a fractured wrist, but when he went to stand again there was no pain. Severus thought it was perhaps the way he had turned it, and went about lecturing Fred Weasley on his idiotic behavior, and how he would surely kill them all if he continued in Potions.

Harry was sitting on the couch reading a book when the pain hit his arm, sending the book falling to the floor. Harry didn't want to cry out, but he could not help it.

"Is Master Harry all right? Does he need Lucy to get Master Severus?"

"No!" Harry yelled, "I'm fine Lucy," he said through gritted teeth. "I just got tangled up in the blanket and fell off the couch," Harry said, to explain why he was now on his knees on the floor.

"If Master Harry is sure, then Lucy will be getting back to the cooking."

Harry waited for Lucy to walk away before he let the tears flow down his face from the pain. It felt as if his arm had been banged in the door. If his father found out Harry knew he would be in a lot of trouble, well, that and then his father would reverse the spell. Harry feared that more than anything. Wiping the tears from his face he cradled his injured arm to him, and walked down the hall.

Harry knew his father had pain relieving potions in his bathroom, for Harry had sat and watched him brewing them down in the labs. Harry had taken them a couple times when he had a stomach ache, and his father took them for his migraines, so Harry thought they couldn't really hurt him. Taking one of the potions bottles Harry downed the contents and immediately felt some relief. His arm still ached, and it was slightly swollen, but now Harry was able to tolerate it.

Knowing he didn't wish to be around Lucy lest she figure out anything Harry went into his room, and pulled his favorite book off the nightstand. His father read from it from time to time, and Harry even though he knew the entire story loved it. Harry opened the book to the second chapter and started reading, but by the third chapter he was feeling drowsy. Pulling the blanket up over him, Harry laid his head on his pillow, the book propped up in front of him. It was not long before the tug of sleep won out and Harry was lost in his dreams.

A/N: I know it was short but I shall see you next Thursday with Chp 29 ( I Didn't Mean To) 


	29. I Didn't Mean To

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 29 ( I Didn't Mean To)

Severus finished out his day at Hogwarts and flooed straight home. His head was throbbing, and his patience gone. All Severus wanted to do was eat, and then go straight to bed. When he stepped out of the floo in his sitting room he could see Harry's crayons and books laying about the floor, and Lucy busy in the kitchens. He had told Harry time and time again about picking up his things when he was done with them. Severus was about to go and look for Harry so he could clean up his mess, when Lucy announced dinner was ready.

Severus sat down in his chair while Lucy began placing the food on the table, but after ten minutes had gone by and still no Harry, Severus started to wonder.

"Lucy, where is Harry?"

Lucy refilled Severus' coffee cup, "Master Harry is in his room sleeping. Would you like Lucy to go and wake him?"

"No, that will be all Lucy," Severus announced, getting up from his chair. How could the boy be sleeping in the middle of the day. Perhaps some chores were in order to occupy his mind, or a bit of assigned reading. By the time Severus got to the door he was fuming at the child. Slinging open the door he saw Harry curled up with the book he read him each night and some of his anger waned.

Walking over to the bed, Severus reached out and removed the book from his grasp, and then shook Harry's shoulder.

"Wake up Harry, it is time for dinner."

Harry tried to fight off the sleep, but it was a losing battle it seemed, mumbling he answered his father.

"Not hungry ... tired Dad. I want to go back to sleep."

"You will get up this instant, and march yourself to the table. I will not have you falling ill because you skipped meals," Severus sternly said, while yanking the covers away.

Harry sat straight up in the bed, rubbing sleep from his eyes, and fled into the other room. Once seated he rubbed his arm a bit. It was still swollen the tiniest bit, and a red mark had started to appear on it. Before his father got to the table Harry quickly pushed his sleeve back down, and grabbed up his fork.

"I would have you finish everything on your plate young man, and then clean up the mess you left in the sitting room."

"Yes sir," Harry replied, looking down at his plate as his father scooped a few things on it.

Harry wasn't really that hungry, but he knew his father's rule about cleaning your plate. Stabbing one of the potatoes he popped it into his mouth and chewed. Harry didn't even bother to chew half of his food and cleaned his plate in only ten minutes.

"May I be excused?"

"You may be excused to clean up your mess, and then you may read a bit before bed if you wish," Severus said.

"Can't I just go back to bed, I really am tired."

"Are you ill? Is there some reason you should be in bed before nine?"

Harry couldn't think of a reasonable answer, and finally shook his head no in defeat. He shuffled into the sitting room and started picking up the crayons. This was not hard at all, but when he tried to grasp the books, his arm seemed to give way, and they went falling from his hand back to the floor.

Severus had finished his own meal and entered the sitting room, cup of tea in hand. He sat down in the chair and closed his eyes, trying to fight the migraine that was attacking him.

Over and over Harry tried to pick up the books, but each time his arm gave way, and the books slid back to the floor. He didn't think of picking it up with his other hand, the thought never occurring to him, he just went about using the hand he was accustomed to, and each time failing in the task.

The fourth time he picked the books up he made it to his feet, biting his tongue against the pain. He made his way carefully around the coffee table, but just as he passed Severus' chair the books fell from his hands again, and to the floor. Harry froze in his place.

"Why, are you tormenting me tonight?" Severus said, coming out of his chair towards Harry.

"Is it because I won't let you go to bed? Is it for some other reason?" Severus yelled at Harry.

Harry blinked, his eyes going wide. His knees began to shake, and he almost wet himself in fear, but no explanation would come.

"I asked you a question Harry," Severus spat, grabbing Harry by the arm, so that Harry was facing him.

Harry's reaction to the pain was to yell out in agony and fall to the floor, clutching his arm to him.

Severus stood stunned. He hadn't meant to frighten the boy that bad, and surely he did not hurt him, but the look of pain in Harry's face made him think otherwise. Shocked at his own actions, Severus knelt down beside Harry and gently lifted the arm Harry was holding. Severus pulled back Harry's sleeve and stared down at the red mark on Harry's arm, and the tears on Harry's face.

"Harry ... I didn't mean to harm you son, I hope you believe me."

"You didn't hurt me Dad," Harry told him, but Severus thought the boy trying to put on a brave front.

"Come, let me put something on that."

Severus led Harry down the hall to his room and sat him down on the bed. He went into the bathroom and emerged seconds later with the healing balm he kept. Severus took Harry's arm and began rubbing the balm in circles over the red mark, and yet it still didn't go away. Puzzled, Severus rubbed even more balm onto the arm, and yet the red mark still remained.

"This should be working. I don't know why it isn't," he said to Harry.

"Really Dad it is fine," Harry replied, trying to ease his arm out of his father's reach.

Severus sat on the bed thinking, and then it came to him. No, he couldn't have, could he? Severus' brow furrowed in thought. Could he in his anger, have broken Harry's arm? There was only one way to find out.

"Harry I need you to flex your fingers for me."

Harry didn't know why his father made such a strange request, but he extended his fingers as much as he could before the pain became to sharp. It was not until Severus grabbed one and pulled it straight that Harry yelped in pain.

Severus dropped Harry's finger like it had burned him. He knew the truth then, that Harry's arm was indeed broken. While not broken in two, it was definitely broken. Severus felt a sense of shame wash over him. He had hurt his son, not meaning to, but the end result was Harry was in pain from his actions.

"Harry ... I am so sorry. I didn't mean to," Severus choked out, before standing up and walking back into his bathroom. When he returned Harry noticed his face looked red, as if he had been crying, but no tears were on his face. Severus leaned down in front of Harry, and handed him the cup of Skelegrow.

"This will help mend it, one glass should do."

Harry took the cup and smelled it. It smelt of old socks, and feet, and he did not wish to drink it.

"Trust me, it is not the best smelling stuff, but it will help you."

Harry trusted his father about potions above all else, so with one big gulp he swallowed what was in the cup and then fought off the urge to vomit. Harry took big breaths trying to keep from being sick, and once the urge passed he felt very sleepy. He did not lay his head down though, but instead swung his legs over the side of the bed.

"Where do you think you are going?" Severus asked.

"I have to go clean up my mess in the sitting room," Harry mumbled.

"You will do no such thing. Lucy can clean up the mess this one time, you will be going to bed.

Harry laid back on the pillows, laying his arm carefully beside him. He was so tired, so sleepy, and soon his eyes drifted shut. Severus' own head was throbbing, but one look at the red arm and he sat down on the edge of the bed. The guilt of it was killing him, and yet Harry had acted as if it were all right. Severus' own father had often abused him, then came back later to tell Severus he didn't mean any of it. Many broken bones, and several bruises later Severus vowed never to harm his child in this manner, and yet Harry was hurt, and he was the cause.

Severus wanted to close his eyes, and yet he couldn't bring himself to lay beside Harry, in fear of rolling over on his arm. Severus did not want to leave his side, so he laid down on the end of the bed, so he would be there should Harry wake up.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chp 30 (Where does your loyalty lie?) 


	30. Where does your loyalty lie?

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

A/N/N: I hope you all have an enjoyable Thanksgiving!

Chapter 30 (Where does your loyalty lie)

After six hours of tossing a turning Severus woke up. Harry was still asleep, and his arm was tucked close to him, so Severus assumed it was feeling much better. As quietly as he could he crept out of the room and into the kitchen. After making sure Lucy would have a fresh pot of coffee ready, Severus headed to take a long hot shower.

Once his shower was over Severus felt a bit more human. He peeked in on Harry and was about to head to Hogwarts when an owl came fluttering in through the window. Severus looked at the owl and knew right away that it belonged to Lucius. With nimble fingers he removed the letter, but the owl seemed to be waiting for a reply.

Severus opened the parchment, to find Lucius' jumbled script inside. What was more disturbing was the fact that Lucius wanted to speak with Severus. The letter had asked Severus to meet with him today at lunch. Severus was livid, for Lucius knew he was to be at Hogwarts today. To leave out during the school day would not go over well with any of the teachers, and his students would surely blow up the Potion's lab if he did not return before the start of the next class.

Begrudgingly Severus sent word to Lucius that he would meet with him. Severus knew the ramifications of not showing up, as he would seem suspicious. Grumbling Severus tucked the note to the owl's leg and watched as it flew away. He waited to see if Harry would wake up before he left but the boy did not, and Severus was running late. After leaving explicit directions to Lucy to send for him if Harry needed him Severus flooed to Hogwarts.

Severus mulled about his morning classes in a rather foul mood. One, he didn't want to be there at all, preferring to be at home with Harry, and two, he was not looking forward to lunch with Lucius. Once the bell signaling lunch rang, Severus dismissed his class, and made his way to the front door.

He had almost made it out the door when he stopped.

"Severus, a word if you please."

Only Albus could have caught him before he left, only he could cause Severus to feel like a child underneath his gaze.

"Albus, I am going to be late. Can this not wait?"

"Severus, I only wanted to tell you to be careful. Going to meet someone as unsavory as Lucius, one can never be too cautious."

Severus merely nodded his head in understanding before walking out the door towards the apparition point. He never could figure out how Albus always knew everything, but he was glad someone knew his whereabouts should anything go wrong. Severus finally reached the edge of the Dark Forest and with a pop he was gone.

When Severus apparated into the front yard of Malfoy Manor, he noticed the new rose bushes out front, and the house elf slaving away pruning them. Severus pushed open the gate and walked up the path, but before he could even knock the door opened, and Lucius stood before him.

"Severus, running a little late are we?"

Severus pushed past Lucius and walked into the sitting room. "You know very well it is not easy to get away from Dumbledore in the middle of a teaching day, and while we are at it opening your own doors these days Lucius? I thought such tasks were beneath you."

"I sent the house elf out to do the rose bushes so we could have a little privacy. True, house elves are bound to their masters, but the one I have is very quick to mention when he thinks I may be wrong."

Severus' eyebrows rose into his hairline at this.

"Do not look at me like that Severus. You know very well that house elves are hard to come by and Dobby has been in this family for three generations. He will do as he is told, or he will punish himself for it, I would just rather not have to deal with him now."

"Lucius, get on with whatever you called me here for. I have classes to teach, and I must be back before the start of the next one."

"Patience Severus. I called you here to tell you some wonderful news. I am going to our Master next week, and inform him that Draco is ready to come to the meetings. True, he is not old enough to join the ranks, but why should he miss out on everything else. It would be wise of you to bring Harry along."

"That is the most inane idea I have ever heard. Why would I bring Harry to witness such things at his age?"

"A loyal servant would be honored to bring his son. You are loyal aren't you Severus?"

"How dare you question my loyalty!" Severus shouted. "I have served the Dark Lord since I was of age, and Harry will as well, but not until he reaches the age to join. I will not have his childhood stolen from him."

"As you wish it Severus, but Draco will be going whether you chose to send Harry or not."

"I will be going now, before you tell me anymore of your ideas. Good day Lucius," and with that Severus slammed the door behind him and left Malfoy Manor.

Severus mumbled all the way back to Hogwarts castle. He didn't notice the second year until he ran into him, causing the child to go tumbling to the floor.

"Sorry, Professor Snape. I should watch where I am going," the second year stuttered before running off down the hall.

Severus went not to his dungeons, but straight to Dumbledore's office. Once the spiral staircase stopped moving he knocked loudly on the door, and then entered without being invited in.

"Severus, to what do I owe the pleasure of this unannounced visit?"

Severus paced the floor as he told Dumbledore all about is meeting with Lucius, and when he was done he flopped down in the chair, as if all the air had been let out of him.

"I can't let Harry go to the meetings, it would crush him."

Severus, did not mention to Albus that he had already taken Harry, and occluded the fact. He knew for a fact he would be at the end of Albus Dumbledore's wand if he ever found that little fact out. Sighing he placed his head in his hands.

"Severus, you know as well as I that having Harry anywhere near Voldemort, is a quick way to end his life. He would be dead if Voldemort ever suspected of who he truly was."

"Albus, then what am I to do?"

"You will go and do as you have always done, Severus, you will deceive them and tell them what they need to hear to insure your safety, and that of Harry."

Severus nodded his head and stood. Dumbledore didn't understand Lucius Malfoy like he did. The man was nothing if he wasn't persuasive in the eyes of Voldemort. Severus on some level feared him, and always had for the nature of his heart was just as black as the vile creature he served so willingly.

Severus finished up his day in much of a trancelike state. Sure, he gave detentions away, but none with him for he wished to get home, back to Harry, back to where life was simple, and the woes of his life stood still if even for only a few moments. He was still feeling rather down when he walked through the door, but the sight of Harry chasing Lucy through the sitting room brought a smile to his face.

"What is it we have here?" Severus spoke from the open doorway, as he shut the door behind him.

Harry and Lucy immediately came to a halt in front of the couch, and Lucy looked almost frightened.

"Master Harry was wanting someone to play with, and Lucy is to be keeping Master Harry happy, so Lucy is playing."

Harry stood, not moving, not even flinching, but as he saw the corners of his father's mouth curl into a smile he took off running and launched himself at Severus.

"How was your day Dad?"

"My day young man was horrible. How could I enjoy a day when I have not seen you at all. Do you feel much better now?"

Harry shook his arm as if to show his father that it was healed. "Can we go and eat now? Lucy made fish and chips."

Severus sat down at the table and soon Harry was telling him all about the new game of hide and seek. Severus did not tell Harry it was far from being a new game, but rather laughed out loud when Harry mentioned how Lucy could not find him when he decided to hide in the shower. Severus watched in amazement as Harry covered his fish in ketchup to the point that it was hard to figure out where the fish was underneath it. He said nothing, as he watched Harry eagerly eating it, as he was glad to see Harry's appetite back. It wasn't until dinner was over, and dessert as well that Severus left Harry's sight.

"I am going to shower. Harry why don't you go and color for awhile."

Severus waited till Harry grabbed his coloring books before he left for his room. Once he was there he shrugged off his robe, laying it across the chair and slipping his shoes from his feet, he went to take a long shower.

Severus came out of the shower, drying his hair as he did, and found Harry sitting on his bed, feet dangling over the side, parchment in his hand.

"Harry, what do you have there?"

"This came today by some owl. I didn't open it as it had your name on it."

Severus looked down at the parchment and took it from Harry's hand, unrolling it as he did. It was as Severus had expected. The letter was from Lucius, explaining how he would divulge to Voldemort of how Severus did not wish to bring Harry along. Lucius also explained that nothing but a blood traitor would refuse his son this honor, and he expected to see them both at the next meeting.

"Was there anything else Harry?"

"You know Dad the owl that came here was kind of creepy. It flew right up to me and kept staring at me for the longest time, until Lucy swatted at it with the broom, and then it took off out the window."

Severus heart began to race, and he sat down on the edge of the bed before his knees gave out. Lucius' bird was a spy, and always had been, he should have known, he should have thought of it, but he hadn't. Severus' mind whirled with a thousand thoughts, all of which were thinking of some way to lie his way out of the whole thing with Lucius."

"Dad, is there something wrong?" Harry asked, his face wrinkling up in worry.

Severus looked down at Harry, and saw his son, his little boy, the one he loved more than anything in the world, and knew what he must do. Severus made up his mind then and there, he would have to kill Lucius and soon.

"Nothing to worry about Harry, but how would you like to eat lunch with me for a few days in the Headmaster's office?"

Harry for the second time launched himself at his father, and this time Severus held on tightly, afraid to let go just yet. After the first yawn, he sent Harry off to bed, but after three hours of tossing and turning Severus found himself standing by Harry's bed. He didn't want to spend another night sleeping in the chair, so he carefully leaned over and picked Harry up, toting him back to his own bed.

Once Harry was tucked back in Severus closed his eyes, and curled up to sleep, one hand on Harry, one hand on his wand beneath his pillow. Damn Lucius Malfoy for making him feel so insecure in his own house.

See you next Thursday with Chapter 31 (The Cold Vastness of Death) 


	31. The Cold Vastness of Death

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 31 (The Cold Vastness of Death)

The next few days Severus was anything but rested. He spent everyday at school wondering what Lucius was up to, and every night woken at the slightest noise. He had never been one to worry, leaving his fate to just that, fate.

It was on the third day of eating with Albus that Severus looked even more nervous. As he sipped his tea his mind drifted in an out of the conversation and soon Harry was poking him on the shoulder.

"Dad, didn't you hear what Professor Dumbledore asked you?"

Severus had the decency to look shamed at ignoring the obvious question directed to him.

"I am sorry Albus. What were you saying?"

Dumbledore placed his cup and saucer on the desk, and peered over at Severus, trying to read his face.

"I asked my dear boy what if any news have you heard about what we discussed earlier in the week?"

"I haven't heard anything," Severus said, placing his own cup on the desk and standing up, he began to pace the floor as he spoke.

"Here it has been three days and he is not one to sit idly by, no, he is one who will stop at nothing to see my demise. He would love nothing more than to eradicate me and everyone related to me from the gene pool, as if we never existed."

"Why Severus? You and Lucius seemed to get along so well as students."

Severus noticed Harry wasn't even trying to hide the fact that he was listening to their every word. Knowing it was better not to hide everything from him, even at his age Severus explained.

"Lucius took me under his wing when I first came to Hogwarts, but much like the others it was only because my family was pureblood, nothing more. There was no love there, no brotherly bond to speak of, only bloodlines. As we grew older I saw Lucius for what he was, a tyrant after only more money and power, and pushing aside anyone who got in his way of obtaining either. The Ravenclaw in fifth year was only the beginning Albus. He would go out into muggle London and hunt Muggles for sport, he found it a game, it sickened me."

"Why then did you not find other friends? Why stay so close to Lucius, and participate in his activities?"

Severus stopped his pacing and snorted, "Other friends? What friends are these Albus? Would that be Remus or perhaps Sirius, or James? They never wanted my friendship, although I did try to befriend them, and what was the result, me being ridiculed in front of the entire third year class. At least Lucius excepted the parts of me that others found appalling, the sallow skin, the large nose. These were not features of James' inner circle of friends."

Dumbledore's face did not have its usual smile any longer, and he came around the desk to face Severus.

"Should Harry be hearing all of this Severus? He is but a child."

Severus turned around and stared first at Harry who was sitting in his chair, his lunch forgotten, and then to Albus.

"Is it better to exclude him from the facts, or would you have me let him go through life blindly about the kinds of people who would harm him?"

"Severus Snape! you know I would never let anyone or anything harm Harry."

"But you would have me shield him?" Severus said, pulling Harry into his grasp, as if holding onto him somehow would make everything all right again.

"Severus," Albus said, placing what he hoped was a comforting hand on Severus' shoulder. "Look at him, he is only seven years old. How can he possibly understand all that is expected of him, of how evil the world is wizarding and otherwise? He can't Severus, he is only a little boy, who thinks you are unstoppable."

Severus knew Albus was right. Harry had seemed so mature at times, but then Severus had not known what a normal childhood was. Severus was about to admit to Albus that he was correct when Lucy came tumbling out of the fireplace.

"Master Severus, someone is in the house, and you told Lucy to come and let you know should anyone enter while you are not there."

Severus' face paled even further. "Albus keep Harry here, I shall return in a moment."

Dumbledore crossed the room to stand by Harry as Severus departed via the floo.

"Don't worry Harry your father will be all right," Albus told him, hoping his words were not false.

"Will you stay here? I have to go and see if Professor McGonagall will take his afternoon class. I won't be but a moment, have another cookie until I return."

Dumbledore left out of the room, but Harry did not reach for another cookie, he sat rigid in the chair, his stomach queasy as he stared at the fireplace his father had just left through.

Severus stepped out of the fireplace, wand drawn and already he could hear someone in his study. He didn't want the intruder to know he was there so he crept down the hall, and carefully opened the door. It came as no surprise to him to find Lucius Malfoy rifling through his papers in his desk, and he stood in the doorway as he spoke.

"Going through my things like a common thief I see. Come now Lucius is this not beneath you. Don't you usually send your house elf for such things?"

Lucius Malfoy turned, his wand drawn to find himself already at wand point. This did not seem to startle him at all, and with a quick flip of his hair he placed a smirking smile on his face.

"Ahhh, Severus. My house elf refused to come. The blasted thing kept muttering about morals and such nonsense. Though he is paying a high price for this at the moment."

"Cut the conversation Lucius! Why are you here, in my home?"

"Now we are getting somewhere Severus," Lucius said, making his way around the desk, in his hand Harry's adoption papers.

"You see I kept asking myself why you as one of the Dark Lord's right hand men would not jump at the chance to bring your son. I also had to ask myself Severus why I never see you teaching him any of the Dark Arts that you knew by his age."

Severus made sure to school his features, not revealing his shock at the things Lucius was presuming, while moving steadily closer to him.

"Do not tell me you came here to validate whom is the most treacherous of the two of us Lucius as you have long since owned that title. What do you really wish as I tire of your games."

"Such words from the father of Harry Potter, Severus."

Severus paled and aimed his wand straight at Lucius, his other hand shaking just the slightest.

"I see this information doesn't seem to shock you. I wondered all these things Severus and I have found the proof tonight. Really Severus, a half blood shall be the reason for your death. I thought you a better wizard than that."

Severus straightened at that comment. "You don't know me at all Lucius, you never did."

"What was there to know Severus? You were a sniveling first year and I showed you the way to power. I gave you something to strive for and you became part of his inner circle and this is how you repay me? I made you my son's godfather, and now you betray me for what?"

"You never gave me anything at all Lucius. I earned everything I got, and all of it without your help. You will not take my son from me, but I will take you from yours."

Lucius stood to his full height, and was still a couple inches shorter than Severus. "You would kill me Severus? You would shed my blood for Potter, who has kept our Dark Lord from prospering as he should?"

Severus gripped his wand, pointing it at Lucius' head. "Your Dark Lord Lucius not mine. You want to know how I feel about you, well, I loathe you and all those like you. I go out of my way to derail every plan that I can, and I do it all for Harry, my son."

"If that is how you feel Severus then I have no qualms about this."

Severus never heard the curse but he felt the impact of it as it sent him flying backwards into the chair, and back at Hogwarts Harry felt it too.

Harry had been standing there staring at the fireplace, willing his father to come back through it when the pain hit him. It was like all the air had been knocked out of him and Harry hit the floor, gasping.

Holding his now certainly broken arm, Harry started to panic. He wanted the Headmaster but didn't know where he was. Knowing he was the only one who could help Harry fled out of the room to find him.

"Lucius, is that the best you have?" Severus smirked, getting up from the floor and cursing Lucius before the man could shield himself properly.

Severus' curse hit him squarely in the chest burning away the fabric of his shirt and leaving behind a bright red mark on his chest, the flesh blistering.

Lucius grimaced in pain but his wand was still in his hand, and with it he sent the curse flying. Severus managed to put up a shield, but it wavered underneath the constant curses sent by Lucius and soon it failed and the many curses hit him at once, sending Severus to his knees.

Harry had made it out of Dumbledore's office and down the staircase but now he was standing in the middle of the vast hall wondering which way to go. It was then that the curses hit him, and Harry fell to the floor screaming in agony, his whole body twitching."

"Lucius, I have had enough of this. It is time you were removed once and for all!" Severus yelled the curse flying from his wand, even as he sat on the floor.

The curse hit Lucius, and sent him hurtling back in a stream of red light. His scream was loud and Severus moved in to finish him off, but in his clouded thoughts Severus forgot something important, Lucius Malfoy was used to pain, just as he was from the Dark Lord. Severus had his wand leveled ready to end Lucius' life, when he heard the words, he dreaded to hear.

The Avada Kedavra hit Severus, and his body hit the floor with a resounding thud, his eyes open in a look of horror. Lucius crawled over to him, and peered into Severus' face, and only then staggered over to the floo, content with the fact that Severus Snape was dead.

Everyone came out of the Great Hall from eating lunch, going back to their dorms to collect their books for the next class of the day. No one however got any further than the small boy laying in the middle of the hallway, curled into a ball, screaming in pain.

Dumbledore pushed students to the side, followed by McGonagall and Hagrid. On the floor lay Harry, and the Slytherin's were beside themselves snickering as everyone else was in shock.

"Harry! Dumbledore called to the boy, as Harry's body continued to twist in pain.

"Get him to his feet," McGonagall advised, but before Dumbledore could touch Harry his mouth began to ooze blood from the corners.

"Don't touch him!" Poppy Pomfrey screamed, running towards them. "He could be cursed!"

All of the students took a step back in fear and to allow the mediwitch through.

"What is it Poppy? What is wrong with him?" McGonagall asked.

"He looks to have been cursed, several curses to be exact. His arm is broken, his heart beating three times faster than it should."

"We should move him then to the hospital wing," Dumbledore suggested.

"He can't be moved right now. The slightest movement could cause irreversible damage."

The four of them scanned Harry for ways to rid his body of the curses when he sat up his body arching, his broken arm, dangling at a grotesque angle. His eyes opened wide, and the blood curdling scream sent waves of fear through them all. Dumbledore reached for him before he fell but pulled his hands back when the green light encompassed Harry.

Harry saw his father fall, and wanted to help him, but his own body was suddenly slammed with the full effects of the unforgivable. He could see the Headmaster and McGonagall staring down at him, but he couldn't speak, his voice gone. Harry expected incredible pain, but it never came. He could feel himself fighting for air as his heartbeat slowed down, but soon his heart stopped beating and Harry drew his last breath.

McGonagall burst into screams and tears, the students horrified to see their stern teacher so beside herself with grief. Dumbledore sat down on the floor, and pulled Harry into his lap, cradling his head, tears streaming down his face. He sat staring into those emerald eyes, ones that used to hold the innocence of childhood, now staring back at him from the cold vastness of death.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 32 (He is Only Seven) Do not kill me for the cliffhanger! 


	32. He Is Only Seven

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 32 (He is Only Seven)

Severus Snape lay on the floor blinking in surprise. Only moments before he had felt the curse rip through every organ in his body, and now he laid on the floor feeling as if it had never happened. Severus didn't question his glorious second chance but instead jumped to his feet, knowing he had to get to Harry.

His feet were a bit shaky, having just been cursed over and over, but his mind raced with thoughts of what Lucius was doing right now. Staggering until he got his bearings Severus went over to the fireplace, and threw in the floo powder.

Severus stepped out of the floo in Dumbledore's office but Albus was not there. Perhaps, he thought Albus had taken Harry to see one of the other teachers. Severus made his way to the door, but stopped when his foot stepped on something.

Severus looked down to see a teacup, broken on the floor and his heart began to thump wildly in his chest. Albus Dumbledore was nothing if he was not tidy, and the obvious lack of either him or Harry made Severus race to the door flinging it open.

The moving staircase did not move fast enough and Severus took the stairs two at a time, stumbling over his tattered robes as he did. When he finally reached the landing Severus stepped out, but it was then that he realized he didn't know where Albus might have taken Harry. Knowing the Headmaster probably took Harry down to the Great Hall he rounded the hallway towards it when he stopped.

Students and teachers alike where crowded into the hallway, and Severus could hear a lot of them crying. Severus' immediate thought was Harry and he rushed over as fast as his trembling legs would allow, pushing aside students and teachers. Severus saw Dumbledore sitting on the floor, but that was not what surprised him most of all. What made Severus sink to his knees was that Dumbledore was holding Harry in his arms, a very unmoving Harry.

Severus knelt down beside the Headmaster and pulled Harry from him. Harry's face was ashen, his arms hanging loosely at his side, and the blood had already started to congeal on his cheek.

"Albus, how?"

"I do not know Severus, I am sorry, truly I am."

Severus sat on the floor and wept, not just tears, but gut wrenching sobs escaped him as he cradled Harry in his lap. His screams of why echoed off the stone walls of the castle sending many first years running from the scene, and the other students stood too mortified to move.

"Minerva, if you will please round the students up into the Great Hall and keep them there until I return," Dumbledore said.

McGonagall rounded up the students as Dumbledore led the distraught Severus to the hospital wing, Harry in his arms.

"Lay him on the bed Severus."

Severus did so sitting on the side of the bed, wiping the blood from his face as he did, and stroking the hair on his head. He even tucked the covers up around him.

"Severus, what happened when you went home?"

Severus told Dumbledore what transpired between Lucius and himself, but he never took his gaze off Harry.

"I have lost him, I have lost my son over this Albus."

Dumbledore came and laid his hand on Severus' shoulder. "Severus all may not be lost just yet."

"What do you mean Albus! He is dead, not just asleep, but dead!" Severus screamed.

"My child, Harry is still alive. I can feel it now, and I would not tell you this unless I was sure. He has survived the killing curse before Severus, he may survive it again."

"How do you know Albus? How can you tell?"

Dumbledore pulled his wand from his robe and ran it over Harry muttering strange words in Latin that Severus did not understand. This went on for several minutes before he finally put his wand away.

"It is as I suspected after you told me what happened. Harry has placed an empathy spell on himself. When Lucius cursed you, he was in truth cursing Harry."

Severus sat his mouth agape in horror, as Dumbledore explained further.

"Since it was you Lucius cursed and not Harry directly he may yet pull through this, only time will tell."

Severus looked away from Dumbledore and back to Harry. "He is only seven Albus, just a baby really, and I have taken his very life from him. How can I ever forgive myself," Severus said, feeling a new wave of tears rolling down his face.

"It was not you who did this Severus, do not blame yourself. Lucius Malfoy is to blame."

Severus stared into the face that only yesterday had greeted him with a hug. The eyes that used to light up everytime Severus would read to him at night. Lucius Malfoy had taken all of that from him, and Lucius Malfoy would pay dearly for it.

Severus tucked the covers up to Harry chin, and stood up, wiping the tears from his face as he did.

"Albus, watch over Harry, I have something I have to do."

"Severus, do not do anything in haste that you will regret later," Dumbledore pleaded.

Severus turned around his face radiating anger. "I will not do anything I regret. For a long time I have wished to kill Lucius Malfoy, and tonight I will get that wish. He will die for what he has done and I will feel no regret in doing it."

Severus didn't listen to anymore of what was said to him. He turned on his heel and marched out of the hospital wing and down the steps. He had almost gotten to the front door of the castle when he saw Hagrid still sitting in the middle of the floor. Severus had often bad mouthed the giant, and yet the man was sobbing over Harry. Severus felt his heart clinch in his chest, but he had not the time to console him now. He would speak to Hagrid later. Placing his hand on the door he opened it and hurried down to the apparition point, and with a pop he was gone.

Severus apparated just outside of Malfoy Manor and went to the door. He didn't bother to knock, but instead flung the door open, his wand drawn as he did.

"Severus, Merlin what happened to you?" Narcissa Malfoy said from the foyer.

"I have no time to explain Narcissa. Where is Lucius?"

"He went to gather up Crabbe and Goyle, something about a meeting he was going to call with the Dark Lord."

"Thank you Narcissa. I would ask that you not mention you had seen me, but I can't really take that chance," and with that Severus yelled "Obliviate!" and closed the door behind him.

Severus knew where they would be meeting, the same place that they always met. He apparated just outside the woods, and snuck through the forest, avoiding the Death Eaters. He crept right up till he was but a few yards from Lucius, close enough that he could hear him gloating to the others.

"Tonight I will take Severus' place as the Dark Lord's right hand man. No more being second best for me."

"What do you have planned Lucius?" Goyle asked aloud.

"It is something once revealed that will have you all green with envy, but I shall not speak of it just yet, no I will savor the moment for awhile longer."

Severus wanted to leap from behind the tree and kill Lucius with his bear hands. He wanted to avenge Harry, but he knew it was not the right time, so he waited. For over an hour Severus hid until the last of the Death Eaters had arrived, and that is when he started to move to be a bit closer. He walked right up behind one of the Death Eaters in the back and stood, unnoticed by any of them.

Voldemort made his way into the area, the scowl on his face threatening imminent pain for anyone and everyone. After taking his seat, he called Lucius to him.

"Lucius, why have you called me here, and your answer should please me for I am in no mood for trivial matters."

Lucius bowed and kissed the hem of Voldemort's robes before rising again to his feet.

"My Lord I have come bearing news that I think you will find most fitting."

"What is this news you have brought me Lucius?"

Lucius stood a smile on his face and Severus stepped from his hiding spot. Lucius never saw him, not until Severus' wand was pointed at him. " Severus!"he screamed, and before the shock of seeing the dead man standing before him wore off, Severus spoke the spell.

"Avadra Kedavra!" Severus yelled, and watched Lucius Malfoy fall dead at the Dark Lord's feet.

"Severuss, you will explain what you have done!" Voldemort hissed.

Severus came up and bowed before the Dark Lord, and then rose to stare him straight in the face, occluding his mind as he did.

"Lucius is a traitor my Lord. He came to my home today and tried to kill me. It was his intention to overthrow you, and to take what he thought was rightfully his. I have taken his life and I must say I am overjoyed that the bastard is dead."

Severus waited for retribution from Voldemort for his actions, but Voldemort simply stared at him. It was then that Severus felt the Dark Lord probing his mind, looking to see if he told the truth, and Severus erected the walls to keep out all he did not wish known.

"Severusss, I see your loathing, your hatred for Lucius. I feel and see nothing but hatred an anger, this pleases me. You have done well to rid me of this traitor."

Voldemort looked to the rest of the Death Eaters all standing in the circle.

"This is a loyal servant. Severus has killed the blood traitor who has wished to overtake me, and yet I see some of Lucius' closest friends who told me nothing. You shall pay for your silence tonight."

The curses and hexes lasted for a long time, and Severus stood beside him, the dead form of Lucius Malfoy at his feet his only comfort. It seemed like hours when in fact it was only minutes, but Severus' thoughts were with Harry, and getting back to him. When the Dark Lord released them Severus walked to the edge of the woods, before taking off running to the apparation point. He wanted to get back to Harry, he wanted to hold his son one more time, hoping above all else it would not be the last time.

A/N: See you Next week with Chapter 33 (Your Life is not Worth Mine) 


	33. Your Life is not Worth Mine

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 33 (Your Life is not Worth Mine)

Severus apparated back to the edge of the Forbidden Forest, and ran towards Hogwarts. His mind had only one thought, Harry. He pushed open the front doors and found Hagrid still sitting on the floor just as he had been when he had left him. Again Severus' heart went out to the half giant, but he had no time, not now.

As he passed Hagrid he heard him sobbing, and even Severus in his own race to get to Harry could not pass him by without saying something. When he neared Hagrid no words would come however, and he found himself placing a hand upon his shoulder, the only sign of comfort he could give. He lingered there for a minute, hoping he had somehow helped but then he took off in the direction of the hospital ward.

Severus entered the room quite out of breath, and strode quickly to his son's side. Harry still looked so pale, so lifeless lying there on the bed. Severus blinked a couple of times, hoping maybe he would suddenly see Harry as he had that morning smiling at him, but alas it was not to be. The only thing Severus saw was the viselike grip death had on his son.

Albus stood on the other side of Harry's bed, watching, waiting as if for some clue to tell him something. He stroked Harry's head, and took his small hand in his.

"I did not know Severus. Had I only noticed the spell beforehand."

Severus head was bowed to hide his tears, but Albus Dumbledore could not be fooled and lifted the chin to meet his gaze.

"Why would Harry do such a thing? Why would he perform such a spell, and furthermore how did he?"

"Harry is a remarkable child, one we will learn many things from. I do not have the answer you seek Severus, only one knows the answer."

Albus left the room, and then Severus was alone in his misery. Harry although before him, did not feel alive. His hands were cold to the touch, his eyes closed, his father's tears unseen. There was no bedtime story tonight, no I love you Dad, before going to sleep. Tonight there was only silence, an eerie silence that threatened to choke Severus.

Severus did not move, did not stir from his seat, even at the urging of Albus to get some rest. He would not leave his son. He would be there when he wakened, if he wakened from this. A thousand thoughts ran through his mind in the hours of the darkness. How he had chosen to follow one that could lead to this he did not know. How Harry had changed him completely. Severus knew he no longer wished for the solitude of being alone, nor did he ever really want it. His youth had been spent in torment, friendless except for Lucius who had only used him, and Severus became bitter, uncaring to all who knew him.

All these things combined had led him astray, until that day Harry had come into his life. Now Severus rushed home each day to share in what new things Harry had done, or achieved. Milestones, Albus had called them when Severus showed him Harry's first tooth that had fallen out, but Severus called them something more. He called them precious moments, that neither man nor monster could take from him. These were the thoughts he held closely to him as he waited for some sign of life.

It was as the sun broke through the clouds and shined into the window that Severus felt Harry's hand move beneath his. He jumped from the chair, knocking it to the floor in his haste.

"Harry? can you hear me son?"

Harry did not answer back, the only sound in the room was of Severus' heartbeat racing.

"Harry, it is Dad. Can you open your eyes for me?"

Harry could hear his father's pleading voice but his body ached. He wanted to cry out to his father, to tell him he needed one of his potions, but his mouth was dry, unable to utter a single word. Harry did the only thing he could, he moved his hand slightly to let his father know he heard him.

Severus called for Madame Pomfrey, and the mediwitch came running to the bedside.

"Harry moved, he moved. He is alive!" Severus said, picking up Pomfrey and twirling her around before setting her back on her feet again. Severus then sat back down as if he had not just scared Poppy Pomfrey half out of her wits, and took Harry's hand in his again, waiting for another sign.

Both Albus and Minerva came in and checked on Harry, but the boy made no other moves to show he was coming around. Dumbledore assured Severus that Harry would waken, given time, and then they would see the extent of his mental state. Severus blanched at that, but he could not deny that Harry could possibly be rendered unstable after having the Killing curse placed on him. Severus waited all day long, taking his meals at Harry's bedside, and only getting up to use the loo.

It was late in the night, and Severus was looking quite haggard himself, eyes dark and red from crying, and his clothing crumpled from having slept in the chair again. Harry could hear someone talking, someone talking to him, and he wanted to answer, wanted to leave the dark place where he had been for too long. It was cold in this place, and he was scared.

With much effort Harry strained to open his eyes, and after several minutes he managed to open just one, and he could see his father mumbling something to a house elf. Harry wanted to scream from the highest tower in Hogwarts; his father was alive. His voice however did not want to cooperate and Harry found it hurt quite a bit to speak. What came out was more of a whimper than a word, but it brought his father to him.

"Harry!" he yelled, taking his son in his arms and holding him. Severus was overjoyed. His son was awake.

Harry tried to speak, but there was simply no moisture left in his mouth. Severus saw his struggle and lifted the glass of water to his lips and let some of it slid down his throat. When he placed the cup on the table again, Harry nodded his head in thanks.

"Harry, son, can you tell me why you would do such a terrible thing? Why would you be so foolish as to cast an Empathy spell?"

Albus and Minerva came through the door just in time to hear Harry response.

"To save you Dad, so they wouldn't take me away to the orphanage," Harry rasped out. A coughing fit started then and Harry pointed to the glass of water again, and this time he gulped the water down.

Minerva and Albus excused themselves to give Severus some time alone with Harry, and Poppy told them she would be back in a few minutes to check Harry over.

Severus sat in the chair, the words soaking in, and it was a minute or two before he trusted himself to speak.

"Harry, my life is not worth yours. What you did was foolish and you could have died."

Harry stared at his father, his brow wrinkled as if he were thinking. Severus thought maybe he had been too harsh with his words and regretted them. He went to speak, but Harry beat him to it.

"Why would I want to live with anyone else? What good is living if you are dead?" Harry then seemed to come to the conclusion that he was in trouble and his small frame began to tremble.

"I'm sorry Dad, I didn't mean to do something so bad, but I couldn't let them hurt you anymore, I just couldn't."

Harry whole body now shook with sobs, but his body was so dehydrated no tears fell from his eyes. He clutched the sheets to him, and lowered his head.

Severus was stunned. His whole life he had waited for someone to love him just the way he was. Someone who didn't mind his snarky attitude, or his obsession with potions late into the night. All he ever wanted was for someone to love him for him, and now he had found out the person who did, who loved him unconditionally was Harry. His son had spoken the words of someone ten times his age in wisdom, and yet he was only seven.

Staring at Harry Severus' last attempt at being strong faded and his knees gave way sending him to the floor. There Severus sat till he felt the small hand atop his head, and he turned to stare into the eyes of his son. Gathering him up in his arms he laid Harry back down on the bed, and soon Harry was asleep again curled up in his father's lap. It was only then that Severus allowed his eyes to close, for it was only then he felt secure in the fact that his son was all right.

A/N: See you next week with Chapter 34 Going Home 


	34. Going Home

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 34 (Going Home)

Harry stayed in the hospital wing for three more days, Madame Pomfrey and everyone else fussing about him. He didn't want to stay there. He missed his own bed, his stuffed animals, and Lucy.

He was so happy on the day he was released that he jumped from the bed and ran out the door, forgetting he was dressed only in a hospital gown. Harry soon came back to find his father grinning from ear to ear, and Harry's face reddened when he saw Madame Pomfrey staring at him too.

There were last minute instructions, and then Severus led Harry over to the floo and within minutes they were home. Before Harry even had time to wipe the soot off himself Lucy knocked him over in her glee to see him.

"Master Harry! Lucy is so happy to be seeing you well again. Master Severus was so worried, but Lucy was telling him that you were strong and that you would be home soon."

Harry turned to glance over at his father. "You were worried?"

Severus slapped his hand to his forehead. "Of course I was worried. You nearly died over some foolhardy spell that hasn't been used in five hundred years."

Severus saw Harry's face fall, and he took a deep breath. "Go put your things away and then come in here so that we can have a talk."

Harry did as he was told and when he returned to the sitting room he found a fire roaring in the fireplace and his father sitting on the couch. Severus motioned for Harry to come and sit beside him, and Harry did, curling up into his father's lap. Severus did not wish to chastise the child, but he had been so scared, so terrified that his son was dead. He could not ever let it happen again.

"Harry, what you did was very dangerous, do you realize this?"

Severus waited for Harry to acknowledge him, but Harry only stared at him. Severus tried again this time taking a different approach.

"Harry, you must never do anything else without me telling you it is all right."

Harry's face lit up, and he shook his head yes, but Severus knew the child did not fully understand the ramifications of what he had done. Severus wanted nothing more than to wrap his arms around his son, but he knew that he must make Harry understand. Severus closed his eyes for a mere second and dreaded what he must do next, but it was the only way.

"You must never do anything like that ever again, do you understand me?" he yelled. "You must do only the things I have told you to do and nothing else, for anything else could end up killing you. Do you know how close you came to dying? Do you even realize that had you died you would never have seen me again?"

That was all it had taken for Harry to break down into sobs. He flung himself towards Severus' open arms begging him not to leave him, promising anything to keep his father.

"I promise Dad, I won't do anything without you telling me to," Harry choked out, his sobs now making him heave.

Severus knew Harry was sorry for what he had done, but he only hoped he would never repeat it again. He couldn't explain to a seven year old the fear he had felt. He didn't think Harry could comprehend that. Resting his own head upon Harry's Severus closed his eyes and thanked the world that his son was in his arms.

"Come now, no more of this blubbering. Lucy has prepared dinner for us, and if I am not mistaken it is your favorite."

Severus and Harry sat down to dinner, but Harry's appetite left more food on his plate than Severus would have liked.

"Are you not hungry?"

Harry shook his head no, "My stomach is still queasy a bit."

Severus sighed. The child had not eaten in days, and he was already small for his age.

"Sit there and finish your milk. I have to go and prepare something to help you sleep tonight. Once you are done you may go and lay down if you wish."

Severus stood up from his chair and walked away from the table, hurrying his stride along, not wanting to leave Harry for too long. Harry sat in his chair staring at the glass of milk in front of him. The thought of drinking it made his stomach churn.

Picking it up Harry took a small sip to see if it would make him sick, and when it didn't he took another, this one much larger than the last. Instantly he regretted it, as the rumble of his stomach alerted him that what little he had eaten was coming back up. Harry wanted to run to the trash can in the kitchen, but his father had told him to stay and finish his milk and not to get up until then. Tears pricked at his eyes as he soiled the floor beside his chair, but he did not get up.

It had been over an hour and now Harry was growing sleepy, his eyes drooping as he tried to keep them open.

"Would Master Harry like Lucy to turn down his bed for him?"

Harry thanked Lucy, but refused once again to get up. He would not disobey his father, not again. His head was growing heavier, it seemed as if it were twice its size and Harry was having trouble sitting up straight in the chair. Finally his battle with sleep was over and Harry curled up in the chair and went to sleep.

Severus brewed the Dreamless Sleep potion making sure to use half the required amounts of everything. He didn't think Harry could take a full dose after all he had been through. Once he decanted it into the vial and turned off the heat under the cauldron he checked the time.

Severus stared at the clock, his mouth dropping open. He had been in the lab for over two hours. He was sure Harry would be asleep in his bed by then, and went down the hall to check there first.

When he opened the door he found the bed still made, though the covers were turned down. Thinking perhaps Harry had gone to the loo, he knocked softly on the door and called to him. When he got no answer he carefully peeked in, and again found that Harry was not there. Severus' heart skipped a beat, where was Harry?

Severus left the room and checked his own room before quickening his steps to the kitchen. He expected to find Harry sitting perhaps talking to Lucy, time forgotten in his zeal to be home, but it was the pungent odor of bile that alerted him when he walked into the room.

Severus could see that Harry had been sick all over the floor beside the table, but what broke his heart was the sight of Harry curled in a ball asleep in the chair. Brandishing his wand Severus cleaned up the mess, and lifted Harry up from the chair.

"I didn't leave the table Dad," Harry mumbled still half asleep.

Severus shook his head, and carried Harry to his room, removing his shoes before tucking him in under the covers. He went to leave but Harry sat straight up in the bed. It was not a smart move as Harry's head started to swim with the too quick movement and he groaned as he laid back down.

"Don't go Dad. I have bad dreams."

"Harry, dreams are not real they can't hurt you. Get some sleep," Severus said leaning over and kissing Harry on the head.

Severus went to his own room and quickly undressed for bed. Once his night clothes were on he gratefully slid underneath the covers, awaiting the blissful sleep he so desired. Before his eyes could close though he heard the creak of his door opening and the sound of small steps coming towards his bed. When he turned his head he saw a pair of green eyes staring back at him, tear filled eyes.

Leaning over he picked Harry up and settled him in the covers next to him. Once he saw that Harry's breathing evened out, noting to Severus he was asleep. Severus rolled over and felt the familiar tug of sleep himself. Just before he drifted off though a small hand wrapped itself around his neck, and Severus held onto it as his eyes closed to dream.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 35 (Too literally) 


	35. Too literally

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 35 (Too literally)

Severus watched for the next couple of months as Harry became one of the most disciplined children he had ever seen. It was a proud moment each time someone complimented him on Harry's manners when they were out, but Severus noticed Harry was not the same as he had been, something was different.

Harry birthday had come and gone, and Harry had once again shown great manners to his guests, even allowing Ron to play with his toys before he got the chance, but it was when Harry came to him one night that Severus truly began to wonder what was wrong with him.

Sure, Harry appeared to everyone else as a happy boy, but Severus knew something was strange when he ate his broccoli even though Severus could hear him retching it up twenty minutes later.

It was as Severus sat down at the table for dinner that evening that he truly began to suspect. Harry had again cleaned his plate, and was sitting quietly at the table, hands folded.

"Lucy has found some amazing oranges for us, and I thought it would be a nice treat for dessert instead of something overly sweet. Lucy's head snapped around at hearing this.

"Master Severus, Lucy got the oranges for you, not for Master Harry." Lucy was about to say something else but Harry interrupted her.

"Lucy it is fine. I will eat the oranges just like Dad said."

Severus smiled to his son. No one could ask for a better child than he had. He was so proud of Harry, words could not even come close to explaining it.

Harry shoved each of the orange slices in his mouth and tried to chew them as little as possible while shooting what he hoped were pleasing smiles to both his father and Lucy. The oranges burned his throat as they went down, and once his plate was finished Harry asked to be excused.

Severus told Harry he could go and play in his room, or whatever he wished until bed, and Harry pushed his chair back, making sure to hurry along his way to his room. It was not until he closed the door to his room that Harry took off running to the bathroom where he leaned heavily on the toilet and retched up the oranges.

Severus sat back in his chair, his dinner making him quite content. Lucy on the other hand was fuming and slammed his cup of coffee down on the table in front of him.

"Is there something you wish to tell me Lucy?" Severus asked, more than a bit perturbed at the sudden glare the house elf sent him.

"Lucy is not saying anything, as Lucy is only a house elf."

Severus was intrigued now and asked again the question he wished to know.

"Have I somehow treated you unfairly, or is there some other reason that you are glaring at me now?"

Lucy bowed her head. "Lucy shall go and throw herself down the stairs for glaring at her master."

Severus jumped from his chair at that response. "I do not wish you to harm yourself, I only want to know what I have done to deserve such a look, and you will tell me now."

Lucy again tried to cover up the contempt in her voice as she spoke. "You gave Master Harry oranges for dessert."

Severus threw up his hands in submission. "And just why would that garner such a look?"

"Master Harry is allergic to oranges!" Lucy yelled at him, her bony hands on her hips.

Severus' face fell, but it only took a second for his mind to remember that Harry was allergic. "Why didn't he remind me about it?" he said aloud, not really expecting an answer.

"Because Master Harry is like Lucy, he is to be doing what he is told to do without question."

Severus rolled his eyes and headed towards Harry's room. Severus knew he had been told of Harry's allergy last time the boy had drank some orange juice when they were out. Harry had then broken out in a rash, and that had only been a small amount. Severus realized then, standing at Harry's bedroom door that Harry had eaten a whole orange at dinner, and he flung the door open to the sounds of Harry retching.

When he stepped into the bathroom Harry was leaning back, his head against the marble tiled wall, a sheen of sweat covering his face.

Severus knelt down beside him and saw that Harry was breathing in and out far too rapidly. He placed his finger beneath Harry's chin and pulled his head up so that he could look into his eyes, but Harry's eyes were wide with fear. Harry started to stand and clean himself up when his knees gave way, and he found himself being caught in his father's arms. Severus picked up Harry and toted him over to the bed and laid him down, removing his shirt as he did.

Once Harry's shirt was off Severus could see Harry's chest moving up and down, so fast that the child would so pass out if he did not slow his breathing.

"Harry calm down," Severus whispered to him, and Harry at once tried to still his movements.

Severus told Harry to open his mouth so he could look inside for swelling. Severus took his wand and cast Lumos so that he could see better, but what he saw was scary. The walls of Harry's throat were closing together, leaving only a small space for air to circulate through. Severus finished looking and told Harry he could close his mouth again. Harry's eyes began to water, but he did not make a sound.

Over and over he gasped for the much needed air to flow into his lungs, but it wouldn't come. Severus noticed with wide eyes that Harry's lips were turning a light shade of blue and jumped up to go and get the potion to help him. He turned to run down the hall, but it was the small hand that grabbed his robe forcefully that stopped him.

"Harry I must get the potion!" Severus screamed, his own fear at seeing Harry this way making his voice crack.

Harry didn't say anything, he simply let go of the robes, his hand falling back onto the bed. Severus went to leave but before he could make it to the door the gurgling noises coming from the bed made him stop dead in his tracks. Turning his head Severus saw Harry sitting up in bed, his hand at his throat, his lips now almost completely blue.

Severus ran back to the bed screaming for Lucy as he did. The house elf entered the room and stood waiting by the bed.

"Go and get me the yellow potion in the lab, fourth one over on the bottom shelf and hurry!"

Lucy left with a pop, and Severus pulled at Harry's hands, trying to pry them from his throat, but the boy's eyes were starting to roll back in his head even as Severus tried to.

Harry stared at his father, tears streaming down his face, the words he wanted to say stuck in his still closing throat. The only thing he could do was stare into his father's eyes to try and tell him that he was sorry, but even that struggle was becoming to much and soon Harry could feel them slipping closed no matter how he fought it.

"Harry! Fight it, hang on son," Severus pleaded, but Harry's arms were growing limp as the terrified look on his face turned to one of release.

Again Severus watched as Harry's eyes rolled into the back of his head, and his chest stopped moving. Severus placed a hand over Harry's mouth hoping to feel even the slightest of air, but he felt nothing. Fear griping him he grabbed Harry and began to shake him.

"Breathe!" he commanded his limp son, but there was no response, and then Severus began to curse Lucy.

"Lucy either get in here or you will find yourself with clothes!" he yelled and in seconds there was a pop, and Lucy was standing beside him, the vial in hand. Severus took it, his hand shaking slightly and tilted Harry's head back, prying his mouth open, and then he waited.

The sound of the first intake of breath was music to his ears and he pulled Harry to him, holding him tightly, afraid somehow that he would once again become the lifeless thing that laid in the bed before.

Once Harry was breathing again in a normal pattern Severus propped him up on the bed and sat down beside him.

"Harry, why did you not remind me you were allergic to oranges?"

Harry stared at his father, his heart thumping in his chest, afraid to disappoint him. "I didn't tell you because you are my father, and you know best. I was only trying to behave like you asked. I am sorry that I worried you."

Severus' mouth fell open. He suddenly realized that the night he found Harry sleeping in the chair, the oranges, all of it had been because of his talk with Harry. The child had been doing exactly what he was told without question, even to the point of causing himself pain and misery, all because his father told him so.

"For the love of Merlin Harry. Just because I am an adult and your father does not mean I am always right. You must never do anything that causes you pain, do you understand?"

Harry nodded his head that he did, but Severus knew there would more than likely be many more conversations such as this in the future. Dumbledore had told him once before that children took things too literally sometimes, but he had thought the old man quite barmy at the time, and flung the idea aside, now he knew Albus Dumbledore was nothing if not well versed in the mannerisms of children.

After making sure Harry was securely tucked in Severus kicked off his shoes, and slid onto the bed too.

"You realize I am only sleeping here tonight as to make sure you do nothing else foolish," he rebuked the smiling child.

"Of course Dad," Harry said smirking at his father.

Severus smirked back before whispering to the now half asleep Harry. "Go to sleep, I will be here watching over you."

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 36 (Hogsmeade Day) 


	36. Hogsmeade Day

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 36 (Hogsmeade Day)

Severus watched Harry for the next few days, to make sure he was feeling better, with no lasting effects from the oranges. Harry seemed to be doing much better, though Severus still wondered about his mental state. Often he found Harry sitting in the chair and the child did not move until Severus expressly told him to.

Severus was sitting down to dinner when he noticed Harry picking at his vegetables again, shoving them around his plate.

"You know I will still see them even if you do hide them under your mashed potatoes."

Harry quickly scooped up the asparagus and put the spoonful in his mouth, closing it with what appeared to be great pains.

Severus jumped up from his chair, slapping Harry on the back so hard the asparagus flew from his mouth.

"Dear Merlin child! I did not mean you had to eat it. I was only jesting with you."

Severus heart was racing then, as he could not for the life of him recall if Harry had ever eaten asparagus, and whether he was allergic to it or not.

"I think tomorrow we shall be visiting Madame Pomfrey, and then perhaps we shall sneak off for a special treat to Hogsmeade."

Harry didn't really relish going to Madame Pomfrey, but he did want to spend the day in Hogsmeade with his father so he agreed.

"Why do I have to go and visit Madame Pomfrey, I feel fine."

"Because I do not wish to constantly be slapping food from your mouth. I think it is high time we find out everything you are allergic to."

Harry finished off his pumpkin juice and got up from the table, following his father into the study. After curling up in his favorite chair he turned to stare at his father who was now reading one of his favorite Potion books.

"Dad, is there anything special about tomorrow, and will I have to wear that silly glamour again?"

Severus put down his book, placing it on the table beside him. The look on his face was one of seriousness.

"Harry, I have by good information that Draco is missing his father."

"That git, he misses that horrible man, who tried to kill you, but why?"

"Whether Lucius was a bad man or not, he was still Draco's father, and now he has no male figure in his life. Would it bother you for us to spend the day with him?"

Harry sat mulling the idea over and over, when Severus spoke again.

"Is it our safety that worries you?"

Harry cast his eyes down, not wanting to meet his father's gaze. It was true he was afraid.

Severus stood and went to kneel in front of Harry. "I shall have on a glamour as not to alert anyone of who I am. We shall not spend the entire day with Draco, for I want to spend some time with my son."

Harry smiled at hearing these words, and flung his arms around his father's neck. They sat together Severus reading his Potion's book and explaining to Harry from time to time what ingredients did what. Tomorrow would be a day out and about, just spent enjoying the day, and each one of them secretly looked forward to it.

The next morning Harry heard his father calling to him, but no matter how much he wanted to go, he couldn't make himself crawl from underneath the cool sheets.

"Harold James Potter! Get out of that bed this instant! We are running late," Severus yelled from the end of the bed.

Harry moaned but crawled out of the bed, and stood there swaying on his feet as his eyes were still closed half asleep.

"I'm ready to go."

Severus burst out laughing. "Unless you wish to parade around Hogsmeade in your knickers I suggest you get dressed first. We shall be having breakfast there if you hurry."

Harry got dressed reluctantly and walked into the sitting room where his father was waiting, his brown hair, hazel eyed father.

"Dad you look odd."

"Do you mean to say that they way I look is not appealing?" Severus said, staring down at Harry."

"No, I didn't mean that at all. As a matter of a fact forget I said anything at all. Come on let's go, I'm hungry." 

Severus and Harry flooed straight to Hogsmeade, and Severus led Harry to a little cafe down the street. After sitting down their menus were brought to them, and Severus ordered pancakes and coffee.

"What will you be having young man?" the waitress asked Harry.

"I want pancakes too, and some bacon, and eggs, and I think I want some oatmeal as well."

"Are you sure you don't want anything else?" Severus said sarcastically.

"You are right Dad. I will also have a glass of milk if you please."

The waitress laughed and headed off to place their order with the cook, and Severus took that time to explain to Harry the plan for the day.

"We are going to the apothecary as I need to replenish my potion supplies, and that is where we are meeting Draco. We can spend the day however you wish. We shall depart from Draco, after lunch if you wish, and then you and I can go and do a few things together."

Severus stopped speaking as his and Harry's food showed up then, the waitress looking burdened carrying all of Harry's. Severus pulled his wand out and gave the poor witch a hand and levitated the plates to the table. Harry dug in immediately making quick work of his bacon and then moving on to his eggs and finally his pancakes. Severus sat back and watched in amazement. He didn't understand where Harry put it all. When he looked at Harry he saw a boy that looked no more than six years old though he was all of eight now, and yet he ate as if he were Hagrid.

"Come Harry it is time we were off."

Harry followed his father out of the cafe and down the street to the apothecary. The entered and instantly the pungent odors made Harry scrunch up his face in disgust.

"Why must the ingredients always smell so horrid?"

Severus smirked, "So that the potions children have to take will taste bad of course. I must gather some supplies, why don't you wait by the door for Draco."

Harry gladly went to stand by the door, enjoying the fresh air when a new patron came in, but soon it was a small blond boy that opened the door.

Harry noticed Draco was not smiling, his face taking on the same look his father's did when Harry had disobeyed him.

"Draco!" Harry called to the boy as he looked around.

"Harry!" Draco called back walking towards Harry, a smile now coming to his face. "Where is your father?"

"He is by the counter collecting up ingredients he will need."

"I do not see him," Draco told him, and he did not notice him still when Severus walked right up to Harry and placed his hand on his shoulder.

"You would do well to remove your hand sir. His father shall not like you touching him," Draco said, pulling a wand from his robes, and pointing it at the man he thought a stranger.

Severus smiled at first and then grimaced when he realized Draco did not truly know who he was. "It is I Draco," he said, and watched as Draco's wand lowered.

"Come we will leave here before we gather anymore attention to ourselves, and later you can explain what you are doing with a wand young man."

Draco explained to Severus that the wand was one his father had given to him right before he died, and that no matter what he didn't have the heart to toss it away.

"Normally Draco I would take the wand from you for you are underage, but if you promise not to use it unless under dire circumstances then I will not take it."

Draco agreed and they spent the next hour in the bookstore, Harry choosing a Quidditch book to look at with Draco, while Severus perused the Potion tomes.

"You know how to use a wand?" Harry whispered to Draco when Severus walked around the corner.

Draco rolled his eyes. "You truly are ignorant aren't you? My father has been teaching me spells since I was six. Watch this," Draco said, taking out his wand and doing a small series of swishes his eyes turned to a marvelous shade of purple.

"Wow! That was bloody brilliant!" Harry exclaimed.

"Young man what was that foul language that just came from your mouth?" Severus said walking up behind Draco.

Draco quickly ran his hand over his face and his eyes returned back to the actual shade, and Harry was left looking very embarrassed.

"Err, nothing Dad. I didn't mean to say it."

Draco was relieved that Harry had not told on him, but he could see Severus would be lecturing Harry later on the uses of soap for such language.

"I would hope not. Gather your things, we are finished here. Where would the two of you like to go next?"

"The Quidditch Store!" both of them yelled together.

"Sweet Merlin, haven't you looked at enough Quidditch books while you were here. Must you drag me into the store with numerous children who will no doubt be chattering away as if they were a bunch of old women?"

"No!" came the reply again in unison.

Severus put his hand to his head in a fake swoon, and motioned them out the door. "Very well, if I must endure this then lead the way."

An hour later Severus' patience was gone. Two young boys had fought over a cleaning kit in front of him, the kit ripping in two pieces before the argument was over. The pieces flew through the air, one hitting Severus in the head, and that was the final straw. Grabbing both Harry and Draco he marched them both out of them store and into the street.

"The next time you wish to go and look in that store, I will be waiting outside. Those children are uncivilized."

After seeing that he would garner no sympathy from either boy, he pointed toward the cafe and motioned for them head inside. The same waitress came back to the table, and again complimented Severus on his two well behaved sons. Severus made no move to correct her, and that made Draco very happy.

When the food arrived Harry again pushed his around the plate, eating only half of it. Severus let a small smile cross his face and then he turned to Draco.

"How are things going at home Draco?"

Draco stiffened at the mention of his home, and lowered his gaze to his plate, suddenly finding his soup very interesting. "Everything is fine at home. Why do you ask?"

Severus put his fork down and stared at Draco till the boy had no other option but to meet his gaze.

"I asked because I wish to know. Now tell me how are things at home?"

Draco sighed, "Mother has taken to leaving for a couple of days at a time, other than that she speaks to me rarely. I basically have the run of the house now. I mean I am the Man of the house anyway, at least to the house elves I am."

"You know Draco, if you would like Harry and I can come over now and then to keep you company when your mother is gone. I am afraid your mother does not wish to see me otherwise." Draco's face fell at the mention of his mother. "I just have to pay the check and we can go. I won't be but a minute."

Harry noticed Draco's mood change. "Draco what is it? There is something you didn't tell Dad isn't there?"

Draco nodded, "Mother often feels I am the reason father is now gone."

"That isn't true!" Harry exclaimed.

"Sshhh Severus will hear you. Promise me Harry that you will not tell anyone, especially Severus."

Harry agreed he would keep Draco's secret. Severus came to the table and noticed that both boys grew quiet the second he approached.

"You wouldn't be plotting anything now are you?"

"Of course not Dad," Harry said, placing his most innocent smile on his face.

"Very well, It is time Draco got home, and I am sure Lucy will have dinner waiting for us as well. Come Draco we will walk you back to the Apothecary."

Severus and Harry watched as Draco flooed back to Malfoy Manor and then Severus turned back to Harry.

"We still have a couple of hours if you would like to go somewhere else."

Harry shook his head no, and grabbed his father around the waist, hugging him tightly. "Can we go home and eat dinner there, and then maybe you could read me a story?"

Severus didn't know what had come over Harry so suddenly, but he liked the idea of going home and enjoying a night there.

Leaning down, he scooped Harry up in his arms, "Come, let us go home."

Harry was just glad his father had forgotten to go to Madame Pomfrey's.

A/N: See you next week with Chapter 37 (Visiting Draco) 


	37. Visiting Draco

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 37 (Visiting Draco)

Harry and Severus spent the next two days together, just enjoying spending time with one another, but Monday morning an owl came flying through the window as they were eating their breakfast, and landed on Severus' shoulder.

Severus took the note from its beak and the owl jumped off into his plate, taking the bacon that was sitting on it.

"Is that from Draco?"

Severus rubbed the bridge of his nose, and shooed the owl from his plate. "Yes, Draco says his mother will not be home tonight and asked if we would like to come over."

"So are we going?"

"Would you enjoy going?"

Harry sat for a minute, his finger tapping the table. "You know I like Draco, even though he sometimes acts very odd. He acts so grown up all the time."

Severus sighed, "I am afraid that comes from being raised by Lucius. He always thought that childish tendencies should be squashed quickly, and he wasted no time I am afraid in teaching Draco the Dark Arts."

Harry dropped his fork. "Why don't you teach me any Dark Arts? And why does Draco have a wand? I want a wand too."

Severus' stare was so icy that Harry looked away, regretting what he said instantly.

"I chose to let you have a childhood instead of demanding that you become an adult at eight. As for a wand young man, we have discussed that you will not be getting one till you get your Hogwarts letter.

"Yes sir, but are we going to Draco's tonight?"

Severus crossed his arms over his chest. "I have to teach today, but if you wish we will go tonight and spend some time with Draco. I warn you though Harry, should any of Lucius' friends show up we shall have to either hide or depart quickly. I am afraid they are still not happy about his early demise."

Harry agreed he would do as his father asked, and when Severus left for school Harry went to collect some things he and Draco could play with.

"Lucy, do you think Draco would play exploding snap with me? Dad doesn't really like to play, says it gives him headaches."

Lucy came into the room wringing her hands on her tea towel. "Lucy should not be saying so, but Dobby the Malfoy's house elf says Draco is not playing many games. Dobby is saying that Master Malfoy makes him study and learn spells."

Harry put the exploding snap game in his pocket and a few books and finally he got down his wizard chess set that Severus had gotten him. Harry wasn't very good at it, but he still enjoyed playing.

After Harry had gathered everything he wanted to take he waited in the sitting room for his father. Two hours later Harry awoke to someone rubbing the hair off his face.

"I must have fallen asleep," Harry smiled sheepishly to his father.

"It seems someone just needed a nap. It will do you good, as we may be there quite late. I would not like to go before Draco has gone to bed for the night."

Severus and Harry flooed straight to Malfoy Manor, and Draco was there to greet them when they stepped out of the fireplace.

"Can I take your coats?

Harry and Severus handed Draco their coats and he went to hang them up.

"You can have a seat, I am going to check on dinner. I will send Dobby in with some refreshments."

Harry tugged on Severus' sleeve. "See Dad he sounds like a grown up."

Severus' response was cut off as Dobby popped into the room, carrying a tray with tea and biscuits. After setting the tray down. Dobby went to leave, but his huge eyes stared right at Harry.

Harry was more than a bit startled when Dobby ran over to him and started kissing his hand, before bowing down at Harry's feet.

"Ummm Dad, what is the house elf doing?" Harry asked, crawling into his father's lap, to get away from the overly excited house elf.

Severus stood, and grabbed Dobby by the back of the neck. "Explain what and why you are hopping around here like some kind of half wit."

"Dobby is very pleased to be serving Harry Potter sir. Harry Potter defeated he Who Must Not Be Named."

Severus grabbed Dobby by is throat, and shoved him away, pulling his wand as he did.

"Dad, what are you doing? Dobby is innocent!" Harry screamed, jumping in front of the house elf.

"Harry, he knows who you are; that could be very dangerous. He must be obliviated at once."

"Please Dad. Dobby won't tell anyone. Will you Dobby?"

Dobby stood before them eyes wide in fright. Harry motioned for Dobby to come closer.

"Sit down here beside me Dobby, and tell my father you won't tell anyone." When Dobby made no move to come near Harry, he pulled him over to him. "Here Dobby sit down beside me." Harry handed Dobby a cup of the tea, but Dobby burst into tears.

"Harry Potter is a kind wizard. Dobby has never met a kind wizard before," he wailed.

"Do you see son. He must be obliviated at once."

Severus was about to raise his wand again when Draco came through the door.

"Dobby what are you doing sitting down? We have guests to attend to!" he yelled, and Dobby was on his feet in seconds.

"Dobby is going to make sure everything is nice for the guests. Dobby did not mean to displease Master Malfoy."

Dobby left with a pop and Draco grimaced. "It is so hard to find a decent house elf these days, but I can't get rid of him, he is the only one we have left. The others I gave clothes to as they would not listen to a thing I said once father died."

The three of them sat down to dinner, Harry staring at the strange things on his plate, but not wanting to ask what they were. Curiosity won out in the end and he stared up at his father who was eating the strange things.

"What is this?"

"Those are snails in white wine sauce if my taste buds are correct." Severus could see Harry turning a shade of green even as he said it, and quickly informed Harry he did not have to eat them if he didn't wish to.

"You will however eat all of your vegetables."

"Draco are you all right to stay here by yourself?" Severus asked.

"Sure, I am here lots of times by myself. It doesn't bother me in the slightest."

"You and Harry run along and play. I am going to go and strengthen the wards on the house for my own peace of mind."

Harry led Draco into the sitting room and pulled the game of exploding snap from his pocket. They played for over an hour till Harry's fingers were raw from holding on to his cards too long.

"You know I think Dad would love you to stay at our house, but he said he didn't think your mother would like the idea very much."

"Why should my mother's feelings matter, you don't see her here right now do you?"

Harry didn't know what to say. He hadn't meant to make Draco angry with him, but he was saved by his father coming back through the door.

"Harry is correct. Your mother would not release you into my custody, I have asked her as much. She claims to love you, and need you here with her. You are safer here Draco, can you understand that?"

"Sure, I am fine anyway. I have the whole manor to myself."

Severus didn't say anything else as he sat reading the paper in one of the chairs by the fire. Harry and Draco each with a copy of the Quidditch books Harry had brought. They all sat there drinking tea until it was quite late. When Severus did look up he found both boys fast asleep, books fallen to the floor.

As carefully as he could Severus lifted Draco off the couch and toted him up the stairs. Draco woke halfway up and found himself being carried by Severus.

"I'm no baby I can walk," blushing as he scrambled out of Severus' arms.

Severus walked with him to his room and waited for Draco to get dressed. Draco reappeared from the bathroom in his pajamas and crawled into the bed.

"I have placed the extra wards on the manor so you should be safe, but if you need me for any reason, floo me straight away. I do believe Harry had a long talk with Dobby about making sure you were safe as well."

Standing up Severus walked to the door and turned around. "Fire call me if necessary." Draco nodded he understood, and Severus walked out closing the door behind him.

Severus made his way back down the hall, and to the sitting room where Harry was still fast asleep. He stood for a moment staring down at Harry. To Severus he looked so small, so fragile, and so small he looked no more than five or six. Leaning over Severus pushed the stray hair from Harry's face.

"Harry, wake up it is time to go."

Harry mumbled something incoherent, which made Severus chuckle. "Come on now it is time we were heading home."

Harry rubbed his eyes, but didn't open them. Holding his arms out, he reverted into infantile behavior.

"Will you carry me Dad, I am tired."

"Very well, if you insist."

Severus picked up Harry, who immediately wrapped his arms around his neck and laid his head on his shoulder. These were the moments that made parenthood worth everything. Severus placed a small kiss on the top of Harry's head, before grabbing a handful of floo powder. After throwing it in, he wrapped his own arms around Harry, holding him tightly to him before calling out Snape Manor, and then he was gone.

Severus never saw the blond haired boy sitting at the top of the stairs watching him, nor did he see the tears running down his face. Draco stood up and walked back to his room once the green flames of the fireplace died down. He lit the lamp beside his bed and crawled under the covers, whispering to himself.

"If Harry wasn't his son, then he would be able to take me in. Severus would then be tucking me in at night, and telling me bedtime stories, but I am stuck here with her, and she doesn't love me at all." Draco laid there until he cried himself to sleep, but his dreams were no better. In his dreams he was the person looking in through the glass to the happy family of one Severus Snape.

A/N: See you next week with Chapter 38 (You are not Safe Here) 


	38. You are not Safe Here

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 38 (You are Not Safe Here)

Harry spent more and more time with Draco, even going there while Severus was at work, unbeknownst to him. Draco had shown Harry his broomstick, and they took turns flying it in the backyard. It was on one particular day that Draco and Harry were playing that the doorbell rang and when Draco opened it he came face to face with a very irate Severus Snape.

"Is Harry here?" he demanded.

Draco couldn't find his tongue to answer, mumbling incoherently.

Severus took Draco by the arm and began shaking him, and it was only then that Draco noticed the look of fear in his eyes.

"How could you? How could you endanger Harry like this? I trusted you to be a friend to him, and you have put him in mortal danger. Answer me Draco! Where is Harry?"

Draco's chin started to tremble then, "I didn't place him in mortal danger! Harry and I have been sitting here all day, and nothing has happened." Draco was now staring back at Severus, his eyes gleaming in a matter of fact way.

Taking Draco by the collar. Severus picked him up off the floor, his feet now dangling, but his face mere inches from the eyes of Severus.

"No danger you say? What if one of your father's friends had shown up? What do you suppose they would have done in retaliation for your father's death? What limb do you think they would have ripped from his body first, what Unforgivable would they have used Draco? You were never safe, not while in the confines of this house."

Severus dropped Draco then as Harry came from out of the kitchen, a bowl of something in his hand. Harry dropped the bowl when he saw his father, knowing he had been caught, and watched as his father made it to where he was standing in three strides.

"I guess I am in trouble aren't I?"

Severus leaned down to be eye level with Harry and glared at him making Harry shake in fear. Severus opened his mouth to let loose another lecture, but the tears rolling down Harry's face stopped him cold. Did Harry fear him?

"We shall tak about your punishment when we get home. Say good bye to Draco now as we are leaving."

Harry wandered over to Draco who was still sitting in the same place Severus had dropped him. "Sorry Draco," he offered to the boy who was staring blankly at him, but Draco said nothing in return.

Severus walked past Draco, and leaned down to speak to him. "I thought you would know better Draco. I am very disappointed in you, but we shall speak of this later when tempers are not so high."

Draco watched as Harry and Severus left. The memory of the only man who had ever shown him kindness, telling him what a disappointment he was repeating in his head. Draco screamed aloud, stomping his feet, throwing anything within reach. "Why is it him! It should be me he is taking home, not Harry, and it would be me if he wasn't around!"

Draco laid on the floor, shooing away Dobby when he asked if there was anything he could get him. Narcissa didn't come home that night, and Draco wallowed in his own misery on the floor, his eight year old mind not understanding.

Harry felt terrible. Draco had looked so sad when he left, and the lecture his father had given him had not comforted Harry at all. Severus had told Harry he couldn't visit Draco unless he was with him. As Harry laid in his bed the next morning Severus came in to tell him good bye before leaving for Hogwarts.

"Harry, I am leaving now. Remember what we talked about last night."

"I will Dad."

Severus came over and sat on the edge of the bed, taking Harry's hand in his. "I hope you know why I had to be so strict on this manner. It is simply not safe for you to be there all alone."

Harry nodded that he understood even though he truly did not.

Severus paused just inside the doorway. "Lucy must go out for a bit this afternoon to get some supplies for the house. Stay here and do not answer the door."

With that Severus left for Hogwarts. Harry got up and got dressed. Lucy had made him breakfast and Harry sat down to a stack of pancakes larger than he was. After finishing only two he excused himself to go and read for awhile, but that soon grew boring. He missed playing with Draco. Sitting alone in the house was no fun.

Sighing for the fourth time, Harry got up to go and get his toy wizards and dragons to play with; but when he went to his room to collect them they were not there.

"Lucy have you seen my toy wizards?" Harry called from his room, still looking under the bed.

"Lucy, has been cleaning Master Harry's room and she is not finding his wizards."

Harry searched for the next twenty minutes and had left no corner unturned. It was only then that he realized the only place he could have left them were at Draco's. Harry sat down in a huff on his bed. He had promised his dad he wouldn't go there alone, but he really wanted his things back. Knowing he couldn't do anything about it, Harry went into the sitting room to draw.

At half past one Lucy informed Harry that she would be going, and reminded him not to let anyone in while she was away.

"Lucy is not going to be long, and then Lucy will be back to fix dinner."

Harry watched Lucy leave with a pop, and then he did feel alone. Drawing no longer held his attention, and soon Harry found himself wishing more and more he had his toys back to stage battles. As Harry walked over to sit down in the chair, his eyes saw something that scared him so badly he began screaming as he backed away.

Draco laughed at the sight before him, as he stepped from the fireplace. "Come on Harry, surely you have seen someone firecall before."

Harry stopped yelling and stared at Draco, "Don't ever do that again!"

Draco grinned from ear to ear. "Look I only came to see if you wanted to come over today. I mean I know Severus said you couldn't, but it is not like he is here."

Harry shook his head, "Dad said I couldn't go there without him anymore."

Draco's face fell then. "How about if you come over and just get your wizards? I found them yesterday after you left."

The mention of his favorite toys sparked Harry's interest.

"Dad said I couldn't go," he huffed.

Draco came up and put his arm around Harry. "It is not like you are going to stay. You are going just to collect your toys and then come right back, five minutes at the most."

Harry tried to weigh the pros and cons of it, but the pleading look in Draco's eyes had him relenting. "All right but just five minutes. Lucy will be back soon, and I better be here or she will go straight to my Dad."

Draco reassured Harry he would be right back and tossed the floo powder in for him. Once Harry disappeared in the whirl of green flames, Draco face broke out into a huge smile. Yes, Harry would return but not the Harry they all knew, and with another batch of floo powder he followed Harry to put in order the plan he had come up with.

A/N: See you next week with Chp 39 (Deceptions) 


	39. Deceptions

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 39 (Deceptions)

Harry stepped from the fireplace into Draco's sitting room, and began at once looking around for his toys. Harry didn't want to be caught, anymore than he wished to be lectured or possibly punished this time for disobeying his father.

"So where are they?"

Draco stepped to Harry's side, brushing the soot off of his cloak. "They are upstairs in my room. Follow me and I can show you my new Quidditch book really quick."

Harry followed Draco to the stairs and down the hallway, and didn't stop till he reached Draco's room. Once inside of it Harry began frantically trying to find his toys.

"Draco don't just stand there tell me where they are!"

"Don't worry so much Harry. Do you honestly think your father would punish you even if he did come home and find you not there?"

"I would rather not find out, so why don't you stop leaning on the door and help me."

Harry opened the drawer beside the bed, and inside were his toy wizards and he let out a sigh of relief. "Nevermind Draco I found them myself. Now I can go back home, before Lucy or Dad figure out I am even missing."

Harry hadn't seen Draco pull his wand, but when he turned around holding his prized toys he came face to face with it.

"What are you doing? Move, I have to get back home," Harry said, fear rising in him, as he stared at Draco's now pale face.

"I'm afraid you won't be going home ... not your home anyway."

"Are you mental Draco? Put that wand down too, Dad said you aren't old enough to have a wand."

"My father gave me this wand a long time ago and with it many lessons on curses. Harry I am sorry, but you have what I have always wanted. Severus will never love me because he has you, so you have to stay here."

Harry realized he was not going home, and tried to push past Draco but he only made it as far as the door before the stunner hit him, sending his toys falling to the floor. Harry wanted to move, to say something but even though his mouth was moving no words were coming out.

Draco walked over to where Harry lay on the floor and picked up the toys, placing them in the pocket of his cloak. "I am sorry Harry. I don't have anything against you, but I have always wanted a father who actually wanted me. Do not anger my mother for she can be just as bad as my father," and with that Draco pulled the wand again from his cloak.

Harry lay on the floor screaming for Draco to help him, but in the end he watched Draco walk towards the door. Tears were now streaming down Harry's face and a small hope that it was a joke flickered into his mind, when Draco paused.

"I have placed a charm on you so that to everyone else you will appear to be me. The stunner won't last much longer, but in case you get any ideas my father charmed the floo to only work for our family. I have also instructed the house elves to not listen to me if I tell them I am Harry. I really wish things could be different Harry. I didn't want to have to hurt you this way."

Harry watched as Draco placed another charm on himself, and soon Harry was staring at a carbon copy of himself, with one missing detail. Draco didn't know about his scar. It didn't matter though as Draco was leaving him there, alone.

Draco popped out of the fireplace in Snape Manor and looked around. He had beaten Lucy back by only mere minutes as the house elf popped in just seconds after he took his cloak off.

"Why is Master Harry wearing different clothes? Did Master Harry soil his others? Does he need Lucy to be washing them?"

Draco never spoke to his own house elves, except to give orders. "I am not in need of your help right now Lucy, but thank you."

The words were foreign sounding even to him, but Lucy went on preparing dinner and Draco breathed a sigh of relief. His stomach was twisting in knots, and he felt as if he might be sick. Draco although cruel had not wanted to harm Harry, and he knew deep down that Harry would suffer like never before for what he had done.

Harry twisted back and forth on the floor but he couldn't break the stunner Draco had thrown at him. Harry had even called for his father, but of course Severus had never come. It was several hours later when Harry could finally move his arms, and then he could move his legs. He jumped up on shaky feet, and wobbled, but someone caught him before he fell back down.

"Dobby, what are you doing here?"

"Dobby, was seeing what was done to Harry Potter. Dobby is knowing Master Malfoy is a bad Master, but Dobby cannot be disobeying his orders."

"Then why are you helping me?"

Dobby ran over to the table and started beating his head on it, until Harry snatched the house elf away from the sharp corner of the table, leading him to the side of the bed. Harry took the pillowcase off the pillow and held it to Dobby's head.

"Is that better? You really shouldn't hurt yourself like that you know."

Dobby burst into tears, "Harry Potter is a wonderful wizard, and Dobby is a very bad house elf. I have spoken bad about my Master and therefore had to punish myself."

"Can you help me get out of here Dobby? I want to go home."

Dobby's huge brown eyes filled with tears and soon the house elf was sobbing so loud Harry had to cover his ears. "Dobby, would love to help Harry Potter sir, but Dobby is bound to obey his master and therefore cannot help you. Dobby feels most aggrieved about this. I will go and throw myself down the stairs for my penance."

Harry tried to stop him, running from the room. Just as his hand touched the house elf's it was too late, and the little house elf was tumbling head over feet down the stairs. Harry screamed and ran down the stairs two at a time, kneeling beside Dobby who was now sitting up. "Does it hurt?" he asked, looking at Dobby's arm which hung at an odd angle. Just then the door opened and Narcissa Malfoy walked or better yet stumbled in.

"What are you doing there?" as she pointed to Dobby on the floor.

Dobby jumped to his feet cradling his arm to his body. "Dobby is a bad elf, and Dobby will be getting Mistress Malfoy one of her tonics right away."

"Wait! you can't go anywhere. Look, his arm is broken, can't you see that?"Harry yelled.

Narcissa wobbled over to where Harry, no Draco stood and slapped him hard across the face.

"The house elf obviously knows his place and so should you. When have you ever cared what the house elves did, as long as they waited on you hand over foot? I also don't like your tone."

Harry stood, his arms crossed in defiance. "What about Dobby!" he insisted.

Narcissa grabbed him by the top of his hair and started walking towards the stairs. "The house elf will do as he is told, and next time he will watch his step. You young man will go upstairs, as you are giving me a headache."

"I am not giving you the headache," Harry spat at her. "It is probably the fire whiskey I smell on your breath. You smell like one of the hobos that lie about the street corners."

Harry never saw the backhand coming till he found himself on the floor, staring up at Narcissa.

"How dare you speak to me that way. You may have gotten away with a lot of things from your father, but he isn't here now and you will respect me Draco."

Harry jumped to his feet, the rage at being tricked by Draco coming back to him now. "I am not Draco, I am Harry and I want to go home now!"

Narcissa began laughing at him, holding onto the banister to keep from falling flat on her face. "You are no more Harry than I am Molly Weasley. Get up to your room."

"I am so Harry, and when Severus finds out that you hit me he will not be pleased, in fact he will probably hex you into next week."

Narcissa stopped laughing then as she grabbed Harry by his arm and marched him into the middle of the room. "I can see now that you still have that damn stubborn streak in you. I would have thought it died along with your father, but I see a lesson in respect is in order."

Narcissa pulled her wand out and suddenly Harry could feel his stomach churning. It was on fire, his arms were on fire, and he never registered he had fallen to the floor.

"You see your father was not a total bastard. He did teach me a few curses should men happen to want to take advantage of me. You would do well to remember who I am, and you will obey me without question."

Harry tried to stand, but his knees gave out, and he went crumbling to the floor, crying out as he did so.

"Oh, get up. You act as if you have never been cursed before, and I haven't the time nor the patience to deal with you today. Get up to your room and if I so much as hear one peep out of you, trust me, you will regret it."

Harry crawled back up the stairs, not knowing what he was supposed to do. It took him over twenty minutes to get back to Draco's room, and then he fell into the doorway. It was only six o'clock and already he was beaten and bruised.

Draco had already rifled through all of Harry's things and wondered how in the world Harry survived with so little. With nothing else to do Draco went and sat down in the sitting room and waited for Severus to come home. He had often seen Harry and Severus playing games, and Severus read to Harry before bed sometimes. He waited for almost an hour before the fireplace lit up and out stepped Severus wearing his teaching robes. After discarding them on the rack he stared down at Draco.

"I would have thought you would be in the kitchen helping Lucy with dinner."

Draco laughed hysterically, "Why in Merlin's name would I do that?"

"Because you enjoy it. You have even begged me to let you help her, even though I told you it was not proper."

Draco gulped. Even though he appeared to everyone else as Harry, he had a lot to learn about Harry it seemed. The thought of doing any menial labor made him sick to his stomach, but he knew Harry liked it so he nodded his head.

"I will go and see if Lucy needs any help."

Severus smiled at the disappearing dark head of Harry, if he only knew the blond boy underneath the glamour he would be horrified.

Dinner went about without incident until Draco pushed his plate away, glaring at the broccoli on it.

"Is there something wrong with your dinner Harry?"

"I am not eating that?" he said, pointing to the broccoli.

Severus wrinkled his brow, and quirked his eyebrows. "Why would that be, you are the one who pleaded that we have it. Are you feeling well?"

Draco realized he had made another mistake and pulled the plate towards him, hoping he would not heave the broccoli. Taking the fork he placed a huge helping into his mouth and began to chew, an instantly regretted it. His eyes started to tear up, as he fought back the urge to vomit, and only didn't by sheer will.

"Enough of this," Severus stated. "You look positively ill. Perhaps you should make an early night of it. Go and get ready for bed, and I will come in there in a few moments."

Draco gladly pushed away from the table and almost ran into Harry's room. After closing the door he breathed a sigh of relief. It was going to be hard to impersonate Harry, especially since he liked so many things Draco hated, from the house elves to broccoli. After grimacing at the pajamas with dragons on them, Draco crawled into bed, and found that at least Harry's bed was as comfortable as his, but Draco flung the stuffed dragon laying on it to the floor.

Severus sat at the table wondering about his son's strange behavior. It was not like Harry, but then again maybe the child was going through what Molly called a phase. Severus hoped not, as he was not known for his tolerance of such things. Putting down his own fork he walked into Harry's room to find him laying in bed, and it warmed him to see that at least the boy still smiled at the sight of him.

Walking around the side Severus leaned down and picked up the stuffed dragon, tucking it in the covers beside Harry, and pulling the covers up to his chin. "How about a small story tonight?"

Harry's face lit up and Severus sat down with the book they had been reading, and four pages later he found Harry had fallen asleep. Kissing him lightly on the head, he noxed the light in the room, leaving the door slightly open, but elsewhere the real Harry laid in a similar bed crying himself to sleep, wishing his father would come and find him.

A/N: See you next week with Chp. 40 (Something not quite right) 


	40. Something Not Quite Right

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 40 (Something not quite right)

As morning peaked over the treetops Draco stirred in his bed. He had slept beautifully the night before, relishing he did not have to fear waking to find any number of things bizarre, and odd going on around him. He pulled the covers back up around his chin and snuggled deep within the covers, closing his eyes to drift back to sleep when the door popped open.

"It is time to be waking Master Harry."

Draco growled, "I am not getting up, I am having a lie in."

"Master Severus says he expects you at the table in five minutes so you would want to be waking up now."

Draco glared at the house elf, throwing his pillow in her direction, before getting up and tossing on Harry's robe. He didn't go directly to breakfast, but instead went to shower, taking his time underneath the warmth of the water. When he finally did arrive to the table Severus was glaring at him, one of those glares he reserved for his students and Draco gulped.

"Just what kept you from coming to breakfast when I sent for you?"

"I was taking a shower, I didn't think it was a problem," Draco retorted. He regretted the words as soon as they flew from his mouth.

Severus stood grabbing his teaching robes. "I expect such things to come from Draco's mouth but not my son's. You were the one I had to drag kicking and screaming to bathe last week. Get dressed you are coming to Hogwarts today with me and I will not tolerate waiting Harry."

Draco ran to get dressed. He had only been to Hogwarts once before with Lucius, and he marveled at all of it. His father had been in Slytherin as all good purebloods should be, and Severus was the Head of Slytherin house. Draco couldn't wait to get there and he was dressed and standing by the floo in only five minutes time.

Draco felt Severus pull him close, and wondered why as he had flooed hundreds of times, but he had to keep telling himself he was not supposed to be Draco, he was supposed to be Harry. Grabbing onto Severus' robes, Draco held on tight as they whirled past grate after grate and finally landed in the Headmaster's office.

Meanwhile ...

Harry woke up his head about to fall off it felt like. He didn't want to get up at all, relishing the feeling of the silk sheets, but it was the incessant tugging on the duvet that had him opening his eyes.

"Master Harry, Mistress says you must be waking."

"She can sod off for all I care, and go tell her I am not Draco. I am getting out of here today, and I am telling my Dad everything."

Dobby began beating his head on the bedpost at this proclamation, and did not stop until Harry grabbed him by the back of his tea towel. "What are you doing?"

"Dobby is knowing the truth, but Dobby is bound not to tell of it."

"You don't have to tell anything Dobby, but can't you at least help me get out of here. Can't I floo out or can't you apparate me out?"

"Dobby is not being allowed to help at all. Master Malfoy made sure to tell Dobby if he did that Dobby would find out the shame of being set free."

Harry threw his hands up in the air and then covered his face with them, as the tears began to fall again. "I have to get back to my Dad, somehow, even if I must convince that old bat to believe me."

Harry slung his legs over the bed and grabbed the robe sitting on the bedpost. Slipping it on he went to find Narcissa to try and convince her he was not Draco. Halfway down the hall, the smell of the bacon made Harry's stomach growl, and he hurried his step. Since he hadn't eaten the night before he was starving, and the sight of the huge plates of food on the table made his eyes go wide.

"Stop gawking like some kind of lunatic," Narcissa admonished, "And for Merlin's sake why have you come to this table looking like that. You know you are to shower and dress before breakfast, or there will be no breakfast."

"But I am hungry," Harry whined.

"Then I suggest you hurry up before I have the house elves clear it away."

Harry ran back to Draco's room and showered quickly, throwing on an outfit from Draco's drawer and then hurrying back down the stairs two at a time, to see the house elves clearing all the food from the table but one single piece of bacon and a spoonful of eggs.

"Hey! What about me eating?"

"Next time you will get up and come to the table dressed and ready. Now go up to your room and stay there for the rest of the day for your impudence."

"I will not, I haven't done anything, and I am hungry."

"If your father were alive you would find yourself beaten within a inch of your life for such sass. I will not tolerate this Draco, and you know this."

Harry was seething now and he couldn't stop the tears that were falling down his face, as he screamed at Narcissa. "I am not Draco. I told you I am Harry, and when my Dad hears what you have done to me he will send you right to Azkaban prison forever!"

Harry again felt the sharp sting of being slapped. "I told you to stop this nonsense about being Harry."

"If you would just go and get Severus we could straighten this all out."

Narcissa's face went pale, and when she next spoke Harry could hear the venom in her words. "I would not ask that man for anything ever again. He killed your father. How could you even utter his name in this house? You will learn to respect the dead Draco, and if I have to be the one to teach you then so be it."

Harry stood defiantly, arms crossed again, glaring at Narcissa as she spoke to Dobby. The house elf disappeared with a pop.

"I will tell you one last time, get to your room and stay there!" Narcissa yelled, and Harry yelled right back at her.

"I told you I am not going anywhere but home! You are not my mother, and I don't have to listen to you."

It was this instant Dobby reappeared with the strap. "As I said Draco, if you will not obey me, then I will teach you to curb that impertinence."

Harry never felt anything so horrible as he did when the blows rained down upon him. He screamed he was Harry till his voice was hoarse, and even then Narcissa kept lashing him with the strap. Harry was so glad when she stopped he couldn't bring himself to argue any further, but he also couldn't stand.

"Get him out of my sight Dobby. I have never seen a more ungrateful child, and I will not be talked to in such a manner. Lock his room, and no one is to give him anything to eat till dinnertime, am I clear?"

Dobby shook his head, his big ears bobbing back and forth. "Very well, go and put him in his room to think about is attitude."

Dobby apparated Harry to his room and placed him on the bed. He watched with tears in his eyes as Harry groaned, but Dobby knew better than to help him. He was just about to apparate back downstairs, when he pulled the single piece of bacon from behind his tea towel. Carefully he laid it on the table and with a pop he was gone.

Harry laid on the bed, and silently prayed his Dad would somehow figure out it was Draco and come for him. As carefully as he could Harry curled under the covers and tried not to move too much for every inch of his back, and bottom felt on fire. For the second time in twenty four hours Harry cried himself to sleep.

Draco and Severus stepped from the fire, Severus flicking his wand to remove any soot from their clothing. Draco stared around at the Headmaster's office in wonder. His father had always told him Dumbledore was an old fool, who stood against the Dark Lord and therefore he should die, but Draco was amazed. Severus went to the chair and sat down to wait while Draco walked around the room touching this thing and that, until his eyes came to rest upon Fawkes.

Draco sucked in his breath at the sight of the magnificent phoenix, and walked over to touch it. Fawkes let out a screech before taking off from its perch, and out of Draco's grasp. This was the moment Albus Dumbledore stepped into the room.

"Severus so good to see you joining me for a spot of tea before classes today. It is rare we have such treats, and Harry I see you have come with your father today too."

Draco nodded his head, and took the seat beside Severus, but he noticed that the Headmaster never took his eyes off of him. Even as Draco sipped his tea and the grown ups talked Dumbledore would take a glance in his direction, and when Severus went to stand, Dumbledore stopped him.

"Harry, you seem different today. Is there anything you wish to discuss?"

Draco quickly composed himself before he turned to face Dumbledore, "No, Headmaster I guess I am just a little bit sleepy."

Dumbledore kept staring at the boy, not knowing what was off, but knowing that Harry did not seem himself. He watched until the door closed behind them, and then he sat behind his desk. For the first time in over fifty years Albus Dumbledore had an eerie feeling that something was not right.

A/N: See you next week with Chp 41 ( I am not Draco) 


	41. I am not Draco

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 41 (I am not Draco)

With a curious gaze, Dumbledore watched the boy he had come to think of so fondly. His attention was drawn away as Severus spoke to him.

"Albus, can you watch Harry during third period Potions. The last time he had a run in with those boys they were less than civilized."

Albus waved Severus off and watched as he hugged Harry goodbye, promising to meet him for lunch.

"Tea, Harry?" Dumbledore offered.

Draco took the cup of steaming tea and sipped at it, relishing the warmth of it as it had been a chilly morning. He was even glad for the horrid jumper he had on, though it was not something he would normally wear.

Albus excused himself for a moment and Draco took the time to get up and look around at all of the things he had seen when he came in. There were several silver things, each different in shape and size, all quite lovely. What drew Draco's attention the most was the phoenix sitting on the perch. Draco had never seen a phoenix, and his urge to touch the bird brought about nasty repercussions.

Draco had walked as slowly as he could toward the bird and then reached out his hand and stroked the feathers. Fawkes jumped from his perch, squawking and pecking at him. Draco drew back his hand, but not before the beak of the phoenix had drawn blood. This was the moment Dumbledore decided to return.

"I don't know what is wrong with your bird, but it has drawn blood."

Dumbledore came from around his desk, taking Draco's hand in his and looking from it to Fawkes, who was now on the other side of the room. "Funny how this has happened."

"I don't see anything funny about it."

"I see, well, considering you are one of the few people that Fawkes will let pet him, I find it very peculiar indeed. In fact, the first time you entered my office Fawkes flew to you straight away, and now he seems not to want to be near you. Can you explain this, Harry?"

Draco shook his head. He suddenly wanted to be anywhere but in the Headmaster's office. He was saved from answering anymore questions when the door popped open and Minerva McGonagall stepped in.

"Albus, I am afraid Peeves is terrorizing a group of second years and has them cornered in the fourth floor corridor. He is insisting that it be you who comes."

Draco sat as still as he could, hoping the witch would leave and not speak to him. He hated her kind most of all, pureblood, and yet his father had told him of how she loved the muggleborns and how she still hailed Harry Potter. It sickened Draco, and when she enveloped him in a hug he could not help but flinch.

Draco was thankful that she didn't seem to notice, but in fact Minerva had noticed and, after telling Draco that his father was looking for him, she closed the door.

"Albus, is something wrong with Harry?"

"What do you mean, Minerva?"

"Perhaps it is just me, but I could have sworn he flinched when I hugged him, and I get the sense he would rather be anywhere but here right now."

Dumbledore began to stroke his beard and then stared up at the witch he had grown to confide in. "That doesn't seem like our Harry. I shall speak to Severus later."

Nothing more was said and the two of them parted ways, McGonagall going to her next class and Dumbledore sitting back in his chair, many thoughts running through his mind.

Meanwhile ...

Harry sat up on the bed, his back hurting from the insane Narcissa. More than anything he wanted to go home, but right now he knew he needed something to eat, as he was starving. Carefully he opened the door to Draco's room and, after seeing no one downstairs, he crept down and into the kitchen. Before he could peek around the corner of the kitchen Dobby jumped out from behind the door toting a plate full of sausage.

"Good morning, Harry Potter, sir. Can Dobby get you something to eat?"

"Dobby, if you can call me Harry when we are alone, then why can't you help me to tell them I am not Draco?"

Dobby hung his head, almost dropping the plate of sausage when he did. "Master Malfoy has forbidden me to say your name aloud to anyone but you while he is not here. He gave me many rules that day, but Dobby is a good house elf and he remembers them all."

Harry silenced when he heard someone coming into the kitchen and saw it was Narcissa looking worse for the wear, but apparently sober now. She made no attempt at conversation until after she had drained her cup of coffee. It was then she took in the shabby appearance of the boy sitting at the table and sighed.

"Did we not speak of you coming to this table clean and looking like a young gentleman. Why do you look like you slept in your clothes. In fact, aren't those the same clothes you had on yesterday?"

Harry dropped the piece of sausage he had been eating then, the taste of it seeming to turn his stomach. "Don't you recall, Narcissa? Don't you remember beating me last night? That is why I have on the same clothes, you twit. I fell asleep in them!"

Narcissa pushed back her chair and was standing over Harry in two steps. "How dare you call me by my first name. What has gotten into you lately, Draco? I have tried to be lenient with you, but enough is enough. You will stop with this foolish nonsense about being Harry."

Harry threw back his chair, sending it to the floor as he stood. His breathing was coming in angry short gasps now as he tried to hold in both his tears and his anger.

"You want to know why I keep saying it? I say it because it is true! I am not Draco! He is with Severus, and he left me here with you. I think he got the better end of the deal, as my father is great and you are not. I want to leave now!"

"Draco! How dare you speak to me in that tone!"

"I am not Draco! Don't call me that!"

Narcissa grabbed Harry by the hair of the head and dragged him towards the pantry. "If your father were here he would teach you how to speak to your mother, and you would not be acting like this. I think you need to be taught a lesson about who is in charge in this house, and it is not you."

Narcissa opened the pantry door, and Harry could see stairs leading down into a dark, smelly basement. Harry didn't have time to cling to the doorway before he was pushed inside. His fists beat on the door till they were scratched and bloody, and still no one came. Harry sank down on the steps of the cellar and sighed. Now is hands hurt, along with his back. He was cold and hungry and his father was probably somewhere right now having lunch with Draco. This thought alone burned into Harry's mind, and he began beating on the door again, this time not stopping till the door swung open, hitting him squarely in the head and sending him falling down the stairs.

He landed at the bottom of the stairs, his wrist bent at an odd angle, his eyes closed. Harry did not see the house elf pop into the room, nor did he feel the sparse blanket that was thrown over him, for Harry was unconscious. At least in this state he was still Harry.

A/N: See you next week with Chp 42 Guilt Ridden when Draco feels he has to come clean, but will they believe him? 


	42. Guilt Ridden

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 42 (Guilt Ridden)

Draco ate in silence as the Headmaster kept glancing in his direction. He did it so often that Severus finally saw it and questioned him. "Albus, why have you spent the majority of this meal staring at my son?"

Dumbledore rubbed his beard, seemingly lost in thought. "Something today has bothered me." Albus preceded to tell Severus how Fawkes had reacted to Harry and then how he felt something was not right about the whole situation.

Severus stood up from his seat, his lunch forgotten. He looked down at Harry, who by this time looked positively ill. "You have made Harry uncomfortable, and for what? Feelings you are having? Something your bird senses in the air? I will not stand by and watch you interrogate me or my son over some idle thoughts."

Dumbledore stood then, the twinkle in his eyes gone as he rounded the desk. "It was my intuition that brought you to me that night long ago. It was then that you trusted me with your very life, and I am telling you now that something is not right, Severus."

Severus rubbed his head, pinching the bridge of his nose. "I do not know what you are feeling, Albus, but I simply do not wish to hear about what-ifs. If you find anything substantial then let me know, otherwise I think I will go home early today."

Severus collected up Draco and flooed straight home. He told Draco he was going to lay down for awhile, and Draco, not knowing what else to do, went into the sitting room and flopped down on the couch. He sat there for the longest time, the guilt eating away at him, so long in fact that he didn't notice Severus coming back into the room.

"I couldn't sleep, so I thought we could do with a day out. Would you like that, just you and I?"

Draco merely nodded his head, not trusting his voice not to betray him. Severus called the house elves to pack them a picnic lunch and then he and Draco headed out to the lake by the house.

After placing the blanket down under a cypress tree, Severus put the basket down and laid out sandwiches and pumpkin juice. "Well, Harry, is there anything you wanted to talk to me about?"

Harry swallowed the bite he had taken and stared up at Severus, but he didn't see accusing eyes when he saw him. "Nothing really, why, is there something you wanted to talk about?"

Severus studied the child in front of him, his child. "Harry, I wanted to tell you why I spoke to Draco so harshly the other day. I couldn't explain it at the time, but after thinking about it I feel you should know."

"You don't have to tell me, Dad, I won't mind," Draco said, his hunger gone now, replaced by guilt.

Severus pulled Draco closer, sitting him next to him, placing an arm around his shoulders.

"You are far from being a grown up, but I feel you should know. I was harsh with Draco, but it was not done because I was necessarily angry. I was scared, Harry. I came home and you were gone and I did not know where you were, and my thoughts feared the Dark Lord had taken you somehow."

"Why would you think that?"

"Harry, the Dark Lord wants nothing more than to get his hands on you."

Draco gulped hearing this. He knew his father disapproved of muggles and half bloods, but Harry was a pureblood wasn't he, the same as he was, and his father would have killed him.

"So why were you so angry then?"

Severus stared out over the lake, the ripples as the wind caught the water soothing him somehow. "I grew angry because I love you and to lose you would kill me inside. I have known Draco since even before I knew about you. I have watched him grow into a fine young boy, but he is troubled, and I fear he will follow in Lucius' steps unless someone shows him they care. I wanted to care for him. I wanted to love him, but Lucius didn't want Draco learning anything but the cold reality of hate. If I could, Harry, I would take Draco in today, but his mother forbids it, and I think he would, too."

Draco's eyes grew tear filled. "He wouldn't hate the idea, honest."

Severus peered down at his son, who had tears streaming down his face. "How would you know, Harry? Has he spoken about it to you?"

Draco shook his head, knowing he was close to blowing his cover. "No, Dad, I just think Draco would love to come and live with us, but I don't know if it is possible now."

"Why don't you think so?"

"I think Draco might hate me is all. He would never want to live here as long as I am here."

Severus then did something unexpected, his face broke into a smile. "I have enough love in me for both of you."

Draco smiled, but it turned again to a frown. "Honestly, Dad, I don't think Draco would ever want to live here."

Severus pulled Draco into his lap, wrapping his cloak around Draco's shoulders when the wind picked up.

"All that matters is that I have you, and if I can help Draco, as well, then my heart will be lightened."

Harry was not enjoying a lovely picnic outside. When he had opened his eyes all he could see was one small sliver of light coming from underneath the door. Everytime he moved his wrist sent searing pain through his arm, but Harry was not going to let it stop him. Swiping at the tears on his face, he walked back up the stairs and began beating on the door with his other hand, screaming to be released, but no one came.

An hour later, quite hoarse from yelling and his body spent, Harry sat down on the bottom step. It was not just dark in the cellar but also cold, and the thin blanket given to him by the house elf barely covered his arms. He was alone, with a lunatic who he couldn't convince that he was not Draco.

Everytime Harry thought of how Draco stunned him he grew angry, but then he remembered Draco's last words of how sorry he was. Harry didn't think Draco was sorry at all. The gush of tears that Harry had been trying to hold back overcame him and he sobbed, not just small sobs, but ones that turned into wails of despair for the situation he was in.

Over and over Harry yelled for his Dad, but his cries drifted off into the dark crevices of the cellar, heard by no one but the mice that dwelled within it. He cried until no more tears would come and his throat was parched. He had no water, no food, and no heat. He was a prisoner, someone they would not find till he was long gone, he thought. Harry pulled a broken chair over and laid down in it, cradling his wrist to him, and fell into a troubled, an exhausted sleep.

A/N: Oops. I was wrong Next Thusday meet me for Chp. 53 Finite Incantatum 


	43. Finite Incantatum

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 43 (Finite Incantatum)

The next morning Harry saw a harsh bright light as the door was opened and he lifted his head with hope. That hope was soon shattered as Narcissa appeared in the doorway.

"I am going out for a bit. When I come back, if you can act civilized and cease with these inane thoughts, I will release you." With that she closed the door again and Harry was cast back into the darkness.

He sat there for several minutes before Dobby appeared beside him, holding a plate of food.

"Dobby is thinking Harry Potter is hungry so Dobby is bringing him food."

Harry stared at the plate of food and pushed it back towards the house elf. "Sorry, Dobby, but I can't eat right now."

"Is there anything that Dobby can be getting Harry Potter?"

Harry grew angry with that question. "All I want is to go home, so unless you can get me out of here then there is nothing you can do for me!"

Dobby began backing away then, twisting his hands on his tea towel. "I am sorry, Dobby, I am not angry with you. Here, have a seat beside me, you can at least keep me company."

Harry's act of kindness sent the house elf into another hysterical fit of tears. After five minutes of hearing how great he was, Harry told Dobby he was tired and wanted to go to sleep. Dobby left him, promising to bring him some lunch, but Harry didn't want any food. He wanted his father. "Dad ... please come for me," he whispered.

Draco woke up to someone staring at him. The fear of his own father doing the same thing had him jerking back in fear.

Severus laughed at the boy. "Surely a father can wake his son without scaring him to death."

Draco blushed, but he couldn't help asking the question. "When I woke up you were staring at me, why?"

Severus sighed, but smiled. "I often watch you sleep. I come in here from time to time to check on you in the night and go to leave, but the sight of you looking so peaceful has me staying each time. I am sorry if I scared you."

"No, it's all right," Draco said, taking the offered plate of food from Severus.

"You know I wonder if Draco is eating well? I overheard someone saying Narcissa was in Knockturn Alley speaking about having to punish him for spouting off nonsense. She never was one to have a light touch with the boy."

Draco put the fork back down his appetite gone. "Did she say what she had done to Draco?"

Severus' face grew rather grim then. "I would not like to think of it. I have seen the way Lucius handles Draco, and I could have killed him many times over for it. Let us hope Narcissa is more lenient. Now eat up I have something I wish to show you once you have showered and dressed."

Draco waited for Severus to leave before he flushed the remains of his breakfast down the loo. He couldn't eat thinking about Harry and what his Narcissa was doing to him. Draco knew the way his mother hurt him when she got angry. He wouldn't wish that on his worst enemy, and Harry had been a friend. The guilt of it all was gnawing away at his insides. He didn't know if he could take much more of it.

Turning off the shower Draco stepped out and got dressed in the same red jumper as the day before, now freshly washed and folded in his drawer. Before he would have balked at the idea of wearing something homemade, but now he loved it for it was made with love, something he both missed and treasured.

Harry had slept off and on a few minutes at a time. It had not been a comfortable sleep, though, as his wrist was far from all right and the rest of him was feeling achy. His head now hurt, and each time he sneezed it would send him into a coughing spell. When the door opened again he half expected to see Dobby, but instead it was Narcissa standing there again.

"If you can act civilized then you may come out."

Harry didn't care anymore. He was too cold to argue at this point, so he slowly climbed the stairs, the light hurting his eyes.

"You will sit here and have your meal, as I will be resting on the couch. Do not bother me for my head is throbbing and I wish not to be disturbed for any reason. If you want something, call for one of the house elves."

"The only thing I want they won't give me," Harry mumbled.

"What?"

"Nothing," Harry quickly said, waiting for Narcissa to leave. Once she was gone he sat down in the chair in the kitchen and fell immediately to sleep.

Two hours later Harry awoke to find his plate of food gone and the house very quiet. He carefully tiptoed to the kitchen door and peered out only to see Narcissa laying on the couch asleep. This was his chance. If he was going to try an escape it had to be now.

Harry searched all around the kitchen. He found several knives, but his father had forbidden him to touch them at home so he left them where they were. After going through every drawer in the kitchen all he had come up with was a corkscrew and a fork.

Harry sat down in front of the door using his good arm and tried to pick the lock, but after twenty minutes he was tired and the lock was as sealed as ever. Growing more and more frustrated Harry sat down on the floor with a thump, pulling his knees up to him.

He was cold and hungry and tired and all he wanted to do was go home. His father would always tuck him in when he felt ill and give him a potion. Then when Harry would wake up he would find his Dad asleep in the chair beside the bed, making sure he was all right.

Harry smiled just thinking about his father, and that is when his despair turned to anger. Standing up he looked to make sure Narcissa was still asleep and he headed for the sitting room.

"Where is Harry Potter going?" Dobby asked, standing in front of the doorway.

"I am leaving, Dobby, now move."

"Dobby cannot be letting Harry Potter try to leave. Dobby is supposed to obey Master Malfoy but Dobby doesn't wish to see Harry Potter harmed anymore."

"Sorry, Dobby," Harry said before pushing past the house elf and walking into the sitting room.

Meanwhile ...

Draco finished getting dressed, running his fingers over the outline of the H on the jumper. His guilt was becoming too much.

"Harry, hurry up, I have something I wish to give you," Severus called from the other room.

Draco trudged into the room, planting a smile on his face. "What is it, Dad?"

Severus led Draco the couch, sitting him down and then pulling two packages from behind him in the chair. "I think you are old enough now to have these."

Draco wondered what was in the boxes, but he did not ask, waiting for Severus to continue.

Severus cleared his throat and then opened the first box handing Draco a beautiful wand. "This was your mother's. I found it laying next to her and took it before the Aurors arrived. You still may not use it, but I thought you would like to keep it as something that was hers."

Draco choked down the lump in his throat. He didn't want the wand. It was Harry's mothers and she had died. He didn't deserve it, Harry did. Severus was about to open the other box and Draco felt the tears pooling in his eyes as he did.

"This," Severus said, pulling the ring from he box was your Great Grandfather's from what I understand. It has been passed down from father to son for generations now, and I think the time has come for it to be passed down to you."

Severus reached for Draco's finger to place the ring on it, but Draco snatched his hand back as if the ring burned him. Severus looked up alarmed to see tears streaming down his face, a face with a look of horror on it.

"I can't take it anymore!" Draco screamed.

Severus was on his feet in a second, trying to calm Draco. "Harry, what is it? Is something wrong? Are you in some kind of pain?"

"I'm not Harry!" Draco yelled, backing away. "I am Draco, Harry is at my house, and I have been here."

Severus' face grew red with anger. "Harry, stop this at once and tell me what is wrong."

Draco didn't know what else to do so he snatched the wand from the table and pointed it at himself.

"Harry what are you doing?" Severus said, walking towards him, arm outstretched to stop him.

"I'm sorry, Severus, really I am."

Before Severus could get to him he heard the spell uttered, "Finite Incantatum!" and before him stood Draco Malfoy.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chp 44 (The End of Fear) 


	44. The End of Fear

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 44 (The End of Fear)

Harry had almost made it to the fireplace when Narcissa grabbed him by his wrist and sent him to his knees screaming in pain.

"Just where do you think you are going young man?"

Harry gritted his teeth, standing though the room spun as he did. "I hate you! I am leaving here and you can't stop me!"

Narcissa's face grew beet red in anger and she wrenched Harry back around, bringing him face to face with her. She was so close now Harry could smell the liquor on her breath, could see her bloodshot eyes glaring at him, and those eyes promised him one thing, pain.

"What do you mean I can't stop you, I am your mother!"

Harry pulled his arm, trying to free himself from her grasp. "You are not my mother, she is dead, and I hate you. Do you hear me I hate you, and I hated Lucius! He was nothing but a Death Eater who killed people for no reason, and I am glad he is dead!"

Harry felt the slap to his face before he realized another was on its way. Narcissa was now screaming at him, but Harry couldn't seem to bring her into focus. His glasses had flown of his face after the second blow, and now all he could see was a blurry vision in front of him. Twisting through the pain he scrambled away from Narcissa long enough to grab his glasses and place them back on, and that is when he saw her coming towards him, her wand raised.

Harry wanted to run but his legs would not cooperate, and he stood frozen in horror as the first curse hit him. Instantly he was thrown to the floor, his head throbbing as it was as if a thousand hammers were pounding into his brain. The only thing he could hear was Narcissa as she screamed. Something had finally snapped in her, and Harry knew it.

"I have tried Draco. I gave you time to grieve, and yet you still have all of the same arrogance that your father had. What did it get him? All it got him was death! You disappoint me Draco and if I have to teach you a lesson so you will learn respect then that is what I will do."

Over and over the curses were thrown. None of them Unforgivables, but at this point they might as well have been. Harry's wrist no longer hurt as all feeling to his arm was gone. His legs jerked with each and every spasm of pain.

Meanwhile ...

What in Merlin's name is going on here?" Severus said, rounding the table, and walking toward Draco. "Where is Harry, and what are you doing here?"

Draco gulped down the vomit threatening to come up, but he could not force himself to speak.

"I said what are you doing here Draco?"

Draco dared to look up and he saw not anger, but fear in Severus' eyes. "I placed a glamour on him. He is at Malfoy Manor."

"Why! For the love of Merlin why would you do such a thing?"

Draco's pride was hurt now and he shouted out, "I did it because I wanted to live here with you! Harry has you, but I don't have anyone!"

"You have your mother Draco," Severus said, while putting on his shoes.

"My mother! Ha! She is just as bad as my father, only she hides her lies a bit better. She is without any morals, she has hurt me more times than my father ever dared to hurt me, and all in the name of love. If that is love I don't want any part of it."

Severus' face paled, as he grabbed Draco by the arm and pushed him towards the fireplace.

Harry felt as if his whole body was broken. He had begged for her to stop, but he refused to call her Mother, and she continued hexing him. Just as he didn't think he could stay conscious any longer he heard the whoosh of the fireplace, and out of it stepped his father.

Severus had his wand drawn, as he stepped through, aimed at Narcissa Malfoy and what appeared to all eyes as Draco on the floor.

"You will release my son at once Narcissa!" he demanded.

"This," Narcissa said, pulling Harry up by his hair. "This is my son Severus and I will deal with him anyway I see fit."

Draco tried to hide behind the black robes of Severus, but Severus snatched him forward. "This is your son Narcissa, that is Harry you are holding, and you will let him go this instant!"

Narcissa stared from Draco to Harry who looked like Draco. Back and forth she stared never releasing her grip on Harry. "You are lying! This is some trick isn't it!"

Harry tried to wrench free from her hand, but he didn't have the strength, and all that he managed was a pitiful whimper when she tightened her grip. This enraged Severus for his son was in pain and with a wave of his wand, the glamour ended and the boy half standing, half kneeling at Narcissa's side looked right at him.

"Dad, help me," Harry pleaded, his hands looking ten times smaller from where Severus stood.

Severus was now pointing his wand at Narcissa, " I said release him Narcissa. I do not want to have to hurt you."

"Hurt me? You have already hurt me Severus Snape. You killed my husband, and it seems you have taken my son as well. He doesn't want to be near me. Look at him, he hides behind you, cowering from his own mother like I am some kind of monster. Well, Severus I shall take from you what you took from me. Blood spilled for blood spilled is a fair trade off wouldn't you say?"

Severus inched closer, all the while keeping his wand pointed at the now insane looking Narcissa. "Don't do anything you will regret. If you kill him, then you in turn will be killed, you must know this."

Severus watched as Narcissa grabbed Harry by his throat, pulling him from the floor." I will regret nothing Severus. All that I have loved is either gone, or looks at me with hatred. Look at my son, he neither loves me nor wants to be anywhere near me. You have turned him against me!"

Draco stepped from behind Severus then, tears streaming down his face. "He didn't turn me against you. It was you! All I ever wanted from you was love, but you couldn't give that to me. You stayed gone for days at a time leaving me here with Father. You left me to be beaten, to be ridiculed for the slightest thing, and why. Wait, don't tell me because I know. You left me because the liquor was more important than I was, always has been hasn't it Mother?"

Harry was now gasping for air, his hands trying to pry Narcissa's fingers from his throat. He turned his head slightly and Severus saw those emerald eyes staring back at him. The same eyes that were so full of happiness, that they had glittered before, now were begging him to help.

"I do not want to do this Narcissa but you leave me no other choice."

Severus raised his wand to stun Narcissa but she dropped Harry suddenly and turned her own wand on Harry.

"I will kill him, you know this don't you Severus? You have seen me take a muggle child and wrench its neck until we heard the snap of it. You will stand back, or you will see him die here and now."

Severus knew Narcissa would kill Harry regardless, it was only a matter of time. He lowered his wand for a second, and watched the sly smile come over her face.

"Lucius always said you were without the guts to be a true servant to the Dark Lord. He said you would fall for those who were lesser beings, like that Lily Potter. She was the filth of the wizarding world and yet you took up for her. See now what a true servant can do. See how I will kill this child with no remorse for my actions."

Narcissa raised her wand, "Avada ..." but that was all she said as her eyes no longer saw, no longer could she hurt anyone for Severus Snape had ended her life.

The second Narcissa fell dead Severus rushed to Harry's side. The boy was bruised, his wrist hanging at an odd angle, and his skin white as a ghost. As carefully as he could manage he gathered Harry up in his arms, and started walking towards the fireplace. Halfway there though he stopped and turned to see Draco still standing there, staring at his mother, but not shedding even a tear in the midst of her death. "Come Draco," he said, waiting for the child to follow. Once Draco stepped into the floo, Severus called out Snape Manor, and with a burst of green flame they were gone.

Severus rushed out of the fireplace, and laid Harry on the couch. His wounds were extensive and he had no idea what all had been done to the boy. He had thought of taking him to Pomfrey but knew if Harry woke up in a strange place after all that had happened he would be traumatized.

Gently Severus picked up his wrist and Harry cried out from the pain. Severus transfigured a sling from one of the couch cushions and placed the wrist in it, and then looked Harry over. He found numerous bruises on his abdomen, and a couple of welts along his back.

"Merlin did she beat you?"

Harry didn't answer, but Draco who had been sitting in the chair spoke up. "She is not one to hold back when punishing. She will hit you with whatever is within her grasp at the time, no matter what it is."

Severus shook his head, "Lucy!" he called and suddenly the house elf was at his side. "I am going to my labs to get some potions for Harry. You will stay here with him and call me if he needs anything at all."

"Lucy is a good elf, and will be doing as Master Snape asks, but Lucy is wanting to know about the other one, the bad one," she said, pointing to Draco.

"You shall watch him as well. Call me if either of them need anything."

Lucy nodded and Severus knew Harry was in good hands for the few minutes he would be gone.

For the next few minutes Severus prepared a potion for mending bones, and for cuts and bruises, but his mind kept drifting away. Not only to Harry, but to why Draco would do such a thing. Deep down he knew, and each time he looked into the haunted blue eyes he saw even more clearly. Draco had never been shown love, a gentle hand, or given praise for anything short of treachery. He envied Harry, and took what he wanted in the only way he was ever taught, by force. Severus knew he would have to speak with Draco about everything, and there was the matter of where he would be staying as well, but none of that mattered now.

Severus took the stairs two at a time heading back up to the sitting room.

"Lucy is watching them, but they is falling asleep."

"Thank you Lucy. Could you go and make me a cup of tea?" With a pop Lucy was gone, and Severus sat down on the couch next to Harry. Harry was fighting the sleep. He seemed scared even, so Severus soothed him by rubbing his back until the shivers stopped. Only then did Severus give him the potion, laying him back down, as his eyes drifted closed.

After rubbing healing ointment on the bruises he pulled the blanket up to cover Harry, and lit a fire in the fireplace. It was then he chanced a look over at Draco. He too had fallen asleep, curled up in the chair, and suddenly he was nothing more than the nine year old he was.

Lucy appeared with the tea, and Severus sipped at it while watching over both boys. Afraid to wake either of them he levitated both of them to Harry's room. After transfiguring a bed for Draco he put Harry in his. Severus couldn't bear to leave Harry's side so he pulled up a chair to the edge of the bed and sat down. He stared first to Draco and then to Harry. Here were two little boys in pain, one physical, one mental. Placing one arm across Harry Severus let his eyes close in sleep.

A/N: See you next Thursday with Chapter 45 (What will become of him?) 


	45. What Will Become of Him

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

Chapter 45 (What will become of him?)

Severus heard the distinct sound of his fireplace admitting someone into his home and jumped from where he was sitting, his wand drawn as he raced into the sitting room. When he entered the sitting room he came face to face with not only Albus Dumbledore but also Minerva who had both of their wands drawn on him before he could blink an eye.

"Severus, is all well here?" the Headmaster asked aloud, never lowering his wand.

"Everything is fine Albus why do you ask, and why have you come here in the middle of the night?"

"We have both been discussing things, and when Dobby appeared outside the gates of Hogwarts we grew worried."

Severus put his wand away and sank down in the chair by the fire, Minerva and Albus joining him in the chairs opposite him. Without being told Lucy came into the room bringing three cups and a kettle of tea, and then disappeared with a pop.

"How much do you know?"

"Dobby was quite agitated, but we did gather as much that Narcissa Malfoy is dead. What happened Severus? Is Harry all right? Is he hurt?"

Severus could see they were both genuinely concerned, each one staring at him waiting for answers he was not truly ready to give. Taking a sip from the tea Severus looked to the door where Harry and Draco were sleeping.

Two hours, and three more cups of tea later Severus had told them the story, and now he felt drained, as he waited for their reactions, and he didn't have to wait for long.

"Severus! You killed her. I understand why but people will frown upon it, perhaps even try to send you away to Azkaban for this," Minerva exclaimed.

Severus flinched slightly at the mention of prison for what he had done. "I did it to save my son, and if they do not see that fact, then I really don't care at this point. Harry is safe, and that is all that matters."

"What of Draco, Severus? What will you do with him?" Dumbledore prodded.

"What is there to do with him Albus? On one hand he almost got my son killed, but on the other is he not also a victim of Lucius and Narcissa's cruel upbringing?"

"You can't possibly be saying you wish him anywhere near Harry." Minerva complained. "He is the very reason the child is harmed, and you brought him into your home. What if he tries again to harm him Severus? What will you do then?"

"What would you have me do Minerva? Yes, he tried to hurt Harry but he is nine years old. Should I gather him up to take with me to Azkaban?" Severus was tired. He had spent the earlier hours blaming himself as he watched over Harry, tending his wounds, and now to know all of it could have been in vain. It was too much, and Severus lowered his head into his hands.

Albus left his seat on the chair and placed what he hoped was a comforting hand on Severus' shoulder. "I will do all I can to help you. The circumstances must be brought to light, but I shall not let Harry be taken away to some orphanage. I will raise him if necessary."

All of them turned when they heard the hiccupped sob, and Harry running towards Severus.

"They can't take you away Dad. We can leave, you can take me far away where they could never find me. Tell me they won't take you away Dad, please."

Severus gathered the boy into his arms, noticing that he was slightly feverish, and that his wrist had come out of the sling. He wrapped his arms around him whispering comforting words into his ear till the sobs subsided a bit, before he pulled the tear stained face to meet his. "I will not leave you Harry, not now, not ever."

Albus and Minerva stood at hearing this. "I will go and try to resolve this Severus, but we must talk again about what to do with Mister Malfoy, and you may be called in for questioning along with Harry."

Both of them stood up, Minerva patting Harry before she followed Albus into the floo and disappeared, but Harry only buried his head deeper into the folds of his father's nightshirt. Once they were gone Severus picked Harry up sitting him down on the couch, and pulling a blanket off the back to cover him.

"Harry we need to talk. I need to know how you feel about all of this."

Harry lifted his eyes to meet those of his father. "Are they going to take you away?"

Severus mulled the question over before answering. "There will be an investigation, but I will not let them take me from you. As for Draco I do not know what will become of him."

Harry's eyes brimmed with a fresh set of tears at the mention of Draco's name. "Why did he do that Dad? Why would he hurt me like that and leave me there?"

Severus had no easy answers for Harry, so pulling the boy closer to him, he tried to explain.

"Harry, I don't think Draco really understands about family. His family has not been a very good role model. To him you had everything he was missing it seems, but to his true motives I can't really be sure. Are you willing to hear from him why he did it?"

Harry visibly shuddered. "Can I think about it?"

Severus pulled Harry closer, "You can think about it Harry, and I will not make you listen, but I do hope you will give him a chance to explain."

Harry didn't reply back, and Severus could see the boy was exhausted. "You really need a potion to keep that fever at bay, but I think it will pass with a good night's rest. I will take you back to your bed."

Harry didn't make a move to get up, so Severus leaned down to pick him up. "I don't want to go back to sleep in there."

Severus then understood Harry's fear. "Is it because of Draco?" Harry nodded his head yes in answer, and Severus sat back down.

"Would you feel better if you slept with me just for tonight?"

Harry launched himself at his father. "You are the best Dad ever," he said, laying his now throbbing head on his father's shoulder.

After Severus laid Harry down he could see the child scrunching his eyebrows up. "Dad, my head really hurts."

"Stay here and I will get a potion for you." Severus left and gathered the potion for Harry but stopped in the sitting room and called for Lucy. The house elf appeared in seconds.

"What can Lucy be doing for Master Snape?"

"I would like you to make sure Mister Malfoy does not leave his room tonight. Should he wander out of it I want you to come and get me immediately. Is that understood?"

"Oh yes Master Snape sir. Lucy will make sure he is not leaving his room."

Now satisfied that Lucy would let him know if Draco tried to leave Severus went back into his room to find Harry half asleep. "Here take this it will help with the pain," he said, handing the vial to Harry.

Harry took it in one gulp, not even flinching at the taste, and laid back down on the pillow. "I am so tired," came the groggy response.

Severus kicked off his slippers and crawled in beside Harry. After tucking the covers in around him Severus dared to close his own eyes in exhausted sleep again. It was the, "I love you Dad," whispered as Harry drifted off that put his mind at ease and placing one hand on his wand under the pillow Severus drifted off.

A/N: See you next week for the last chapter (A New Kind of Family) 


	46. A Different Kind of Family

Title: What Might Have Been

Summary: What might have been had Harry not gone to the Dursley's all those years ago, but instead been raised as a wizard.

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I just play with them.

A/N: This fic is AU, not canon. For this fic's purposes Voldemort will not stay near death.

A/N/N: A/N: Well this fic is over but a new fic shall take its place next Thursday! I hope to see you all there! The new fic shall be titled (For You I Will)

Chapter 46 ( A Different Kind of Family)

As the hours ticked by Harry had slept, but Draco Malfoy had been awake for hours, staring up at the ceiling, wondering what his fate would be. Draco heard the door swing open to his room and he heard the footsteps coming towards his bed, but he didn't dare look into the emerald eyes he knew would be staring at him.

Harry didn't say anything, for he didn't know what to say. Part of him was angry at Draco, angrier than he had ever been, but part of him wanted to know why Draco had done it.

Carefully as to not wake the boy Harry walked to the side of the bed and sat down. He was still feeling quite light headed even though he had slept for most of the night. He was startled almost to the point of screaming when Draco turned over to face him, and in that moment Harry didn't know whether to run or to stay.

"I guess you want to know why don't you?"

Harry didn't answer him, he didn't say anything at all for a couple of minutes, fighting with himself over whether to run to Severus or not. Surely his father would wake up, and once he found him not in the bed any longer he would come looking for him. Harry licked his lips, and asked the question. "Why would you leave me there when you knew she would hurt me?"

Draco's face fell, his eyes staring down at the covers. Harry thought Draco was avoiding his question and was about to get up and leave.

"No, stay. I owe you an explanation. Well, I really owe you more than that."

Harry sat back down, but the fear that crept up inside him did nothing to calm his already churning stomach. "So why?"

The question was a simple one but Draco still found his mouth so dry he had to swallow twice before he began.

"Listen Harry. I never meant to hurt you. I just wanted to have what you have, someone who cared about me."

"You used me to have a family? You already had a family Draco, why did you have to try and take mine?"

"You call what I have a family? My mother almost killed you, and my father would have had he been alive. Harry, my parents are not what you would call a family."

Harry leaned closer to the bed then, whispering as he talked. " She hurt me Draco, did she do that to you too?"

Draco didn't answer Harry, he couldn't as flashes of beatings flew through his mind. "Harry, I never meant for you to get hurt. I wasn't thinking when I left you there. Can you ever forgive me?"

Harry was about to answer when Lucy opened the door. "Master Malfoy, I is hearing you talking to someone." Lucy stared over at Harry who was now standing beside the bed, but the sudden movement had caused him to become woozy, and he had to grasp the bed to keep from falling. This was all it took for Lucy to run for Severus.

Severus was sleeping, his dreams filled with unease as he slumbered, and yet he felt someone tugging on his sleeve and he was awake, wand drawn in a flash, staring into the eyes of his house elf.

"What is it Lucy? Has Mister Malfoy tried to escape?"

Lucy was jumping up and down now, tugging on his sleeve as hard as she could. "Mister Malfoy is not leaving his room, but Master Harry is there, and he is not looking well."

Severus looked over to the pillow Harry had been asleep on when he had closed his eyes, the pillow was now empty and Severus jumped from the bed, knocking Lucy down as he ran past her.

As Severus ran down the hall one dreadful thought raced through his mind over and over. He knew it was a horrible thing to think, but he knew after everything Harry had been through that he would personally take Draco to Azkaban if he had laid one finger on his son.

Flinging open the door Severus saw Harry crumble to the floor beside the bed, but he also saw Draco clamber from the bed, to his side, trying to help him up.

"Stand away from Harry," Severus ordered from where he stood. Once Draco stepped away, Severus strode to Harry's side in three brisk steps, and gathered the boy up in his arms, placing him on the bed.

"Harry are you all right?" When Harry didn't answer right away Severus started prodding and poking him in various places making sure nothing was broken or bleeding, and after a couple moments he was satisfied.

"I'm all right Dad, I just don't feel too good."

"You should not be out of bed young man. You have suffered a great deal, and your body needs time to heal from all of it."

Severus ushered Draco out of the way, and sent Lucy to fetch a potion, while he tucked Harry securely under the covers. He wanted to take Harry back to his room but any movement seemed to make Harry nauseated.

Lucy returned in seconds with the potion and Severus helped Harry to sit up to take it. The first batch came right back up, but the second dose stayed down, and Harry fell back on the pillows exhausted again.

Severus then turned on Draco who had been standing behind him, next to the chair. "Did you do anything to him?" he snarled.

Draco backed up from the menacing look. "I didn't do anything, honest." When Severus showed no signs of believing him at all, Draco tried to choke back the tears that were coming.

"Do not try to pretend with me Draco for I have known you your whole life. You wish me to believe you but how can I now? You purposely left Harry to be harmed for your own selfish gain. My trust is not given lightly, and I am afraid you have taken the trust I had in you away."

Draco was now in tears, hiccupping as he tried to hold them back. "Does this mean you don't care about me now! Does this mean just because you have a son, you don't have time for me anymore?"

Severus grew angry then, his face becoming red with the strain of trying to hold down his voice. "I have cared for you since you were born, but how do you repay me, by harming my son? I was the one who took care of you when your father beat you when you were but five Draco. It was I who took you in for a week when they left the house, but you have done something I didn't think you capable of. What were you thinking Draco? What was going through your mind, when you left Harry there to suffer the same kind of fate?"

Draco dropped down in the chair, sobbing now. "Answer me Draco!" Severus yelled, causing Harry to waken.

"I don't know what I was thinking. I just ... I just wanted to have a family that didn't think of me as a burden. I just wanted someone to be proud of me, to care about me. I never wanted to hurt Harry, really I didn't." Draco pulled his knees up to him now and continued to cry, no longer able to stare into the eyes of a man who had meant the world to him.

Severus now sat down on the edge of the bed, staring between the son he loved more than life itself, and the boy who he had watched grow up. He would have done anything for Draco, and many times he had wanted to take him from Lucius and Narcissa, but he had never been able to find a way. Now he had the boy, but could he take the chance that he would not hurt Harry again? Could he live with himself if he brought Draco into his home, only to have him harm what he treasured more than anything else?"

Severus was drawn from his thoughts as Harry whimpered. "Harry are you in pain? Is it your wrist, your back, your stomach?"

Harry slowly shook his head, though he did feel badly. "What will we do with Draco?"

Severus looked back towards the chair, and the red rimmed eyes that stared motionless up at him now. "What do you suggest we do Harry? He has hurt you, and left you for dead only to try and take your place? Would you forgive him so easily, trust him even?"

Harry shook his head, but then stopped when the room began to spin and his head started to ache.

"Hush now Harry, we do not need to talk about this now, you are not well and you need time to heal."

Harry held his head as he shook it again. "No Dad, I have to tell you something."

Severus helped Harry to lay back down against the pillows. "What do you need to tell me that is so important?" he asked, while brushing the stray hair from Harry's face.

"Draco, he is just like me. You took me home when Voldemort killed my mom and dad, and now his parents are gone too. I know he hurt me Dad, and I am kind of scared to be alone with him, but I don't hate him. Can't we help him? Can't we show him that being bad is not good like you tell me?"

Severus Snape smiled down at his son. "You never cease to amaze me. Even though he has caused you so much pain, and hurt, you would have me forgive him?"

"Please Dad, everyone needs a second chance you said. Doesn't Draco?"

Severus sat for a second lost in the past. He recalled someone named Albus Dumbledore giving him a second chance when he didn't think he deserved it, maybe now it was time to give one of his own. "Harry, I have never been one that is forgiving. I do not know if I can," he admitted.

"Please try Dad. Draco doesn't have anyone else."

Severus stared at Draco who was now staring at Harry. He hadn't wanted the boy to come to harm, but he couldn't bring himself to trust him, not yet, possibly never, but he would give him the same chance he had been given. As he opened his mouth to tell Draco, he was cut off by Draco.

"You mean you want me to stay here with you Harry, even after all I have done to you?"

Harry scooted closer to his father then, his instincts making him fear Draco even then. "I don't trust you Draco, but I don't want you to be sent away. Maybe Dad can help you be good instead of bad."

Severus had seen and heard enough for one night. Conjuring a bed out of the chair he told Draco to lay down and get some sleep. "We will sort this out in the morning, for now Harry you feel quite warm, and I want you to close your eyes and go back to sleep."

Harry clutched his father's shirt then, "You won't leave me will you Dad?"

Severus kissed him lightly on the head, and then pulled the covers up, tucking them in around him. "I will not leave you Harry, not now, not ever."

"Goodnight Dad, I love you," Harry whispered before falling asleep.

Severus smiled as he watched Harry's breathing even out, "Goodnight Harry I love you too."

The next morning Albus Dumbledore returned to Snape Manor, and he and Severus sat down to a cup of tea in the sitting room, so that Severus could watch Harry's door should he need him.

"How is Harry doing Severus?"

"He is much better today, though his injuries still are not healed completely and he has a small fever, but I am sure that will break soon."

Dumbledore then asked what Severus dreaded most, "And what of Draco?"

Severus explained his plan to Dumbledore. It was something he had Harry had talked about early that morning when Harry had woken up, and Draco still slept. Severus at first had been adamant about refusing such a plan, but Harry's pleading had made him cave at the first sign of tears.

"Severus, are you sure this is such a good idea? You would have Draco Malfoy move in here, and adopt him as well, after what he has done? What about Harry? How will you keep him safe from this occurring again?"

Severus' face lit up with a smile, a rare sight on the Potion Master. "As a matter of fact it was Harry's idea. I can't say it will be easy Albus. I can't even say I treasure the idea fully myself, but Harry has assured me that Draco can be saved, and I believe my son."

Severus and Albus sat for a few more minutes sipping their tea, and talking about the final paperwork that would need to be done. There wouldn't be anyone to contest the adoption since both parents were dead, and all other relatives were leery about taking the boy in.

Two months went by and Harry healed from all his injuries. Draco's birthday was coming up, and the morning of the birthday he was presented with the adoption papers.

"Are you really sure? You mean it?" he said through tear filled eyes.

"Of course we mean it," Harry said, slapping him on the arm. "Now blow out the candles."

It had been a good birthday, and Draco and Harry grew closer and closer. It was however not until Harry's birthday that the biggest surprise of them all came.

After spending the day opening his gifts, and playing with them Harry was more than ready for bed. Severus led the way to his room where Harry had been sleeping for the past few months too scared to sleep alone in the room with Draco, but Harry stopped before going in.

"Can I sleep in my room tonight Dad?"

Severus knelt down so he was eye level with Harry. "Are you sure you feel safe doing so?"

Harry chewed his lip for a moment, but then he smiled. "I'm ten years old now Dad. I need to learn to sleep in my own room."

Severus hugged him and led him down the hall towards his room. Draco was already in bed, and he turned around startled when Harry and Severus walked in.

Severus waved his wand and soon Harry's old bed turned into two, and Harry ran over to his jumping beneath the covers. Severus walked over to Draco, and pulled the covers up, before turning to Harry. He sat down on the edge of the bed, and asked one more time.

"Harry are you sure you want to do this?"

Harry nodded his head yes, but motioned Severus to come closer. "I still can come in your room if I have a bad dream can't I?"

Severus chuckled and mussed Harry's hair up. "You may indeed. It is now time to sleep, but if you need me just call or come to my room."

Harry told him he would be fine. Severus stood in the doorway, staring at both boys. They had come a long way in the few short months they had been together. Draco no longer felt a need to show he was a part of the family, as he felt like he was a little more each day, and Harry seemed as if he were overcoming his fears.

Severus turned to leave the room, but he stopped when he heard Harry talking.

"I love you Dad," floated across the room.

Severus walked back over and placed a kiss first on Harry's head and then on Draco's. "I love you both. Get some sleep."

Severus walked back into the sitting room and had a seat. How he come to this? he thought. A year from now both of them would be going to Hogwarts. Would they be together, would they be apart? Severus realized that though they had come through many challenges, that they had so many more to face.

In another year he would be not only their father but their teacher. There would be homework, and if he knew his sons, detentions. He would surely go gray from the stress alone, but for now he was content to come home each day and just be a family, one that was different by all aspects of the word family, but one that was held together with the strongest bonds of love.

A/N: Well this fic is over but a new fic shall take its place next Thursday! I hope to see you all there! The new fic shall be titled (For You I Will) 


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